ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Hubie Househead Humps It

Updated on August 8, 2010
Hubie Househead humps it, rickzimmerman 2010
Hubie Househead humps it, rickzimmerman 2010

Don’t be concerned. I’ve now taken over control of your computer screen. You are about to visit the truly faraway planet of Dunnryte — where everything is, well . . . done right.

Politicians on Dunnryte sleep only with their spouses, and actually move their lips without lying. There is but one country and one national government on Dunnryte — no wars, invasions or missions accomplished or not accomplished — and that government is a government with a small ‘g’. Its mint’s printing presses print only what money is needed for revenue, and that money is promptly redeposited with the government without ever passing through citizens’ hands. There is thus no complaining about taxes or any government program, because neither taxes nor government programs exist.

Beer on Dunnryte not only makes you think you are more attractive, it actually makes you more attractive. Dunnryte pizza is a diet food, as is a bloomin’ onion, as well as all those silly cheesecakes of every variety. Since everyone on Dunnryte has sex about 14 times a day, there’s no urge for rape or date rape or peeping or creeping or any of the other distasteful things we earthlings do to one another in pursuit of the big ‘O’. It’s also no big deal if someone’s not interested in you on Dunnryte, ‘cause you’ll probably have sex with someone else any moment now, anyway.

Which brings us ‘round to Hubie. Hubie is a Househead, one of several species of ambulatory dwelling on Dunnryte. (There’s the Apartimentos, the Bungalumps, and the Coastal Condokleins, among others). If an area of Dunnryte happens to become ‘disadvantaged’, a bunch of really snappy Hubies hump it over there to gentrify the neighborhood. Too many foreclosures? Hubie humps it on down the road, to where the sprawl beckons. Urban renewal? Hubie and his pals will kindly step aside. Growing family? Hubie hooks up with Henrietta Househead, and bingo! — five bedrooms, four baths, closets to spare!

 I now return control of your computer screen to you . . .


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)