I need mercy of the Lord
I need the mercy of the Lord.
I already told you that there is a shift in my prayer now a days. And I
see some changes in my life. Earlier I used to pray to make me a
millionaire. I thought living a life of millionaire is the greatest
life. Now I love the giver than the gift. So I pray that God come and
live within me. While I praying this prayer, my inner being told me
that I am neither worthy to receive the Spirit of God nor worthy for
God to live within me.
Thant means I did a lot of sin in my life. I am not in a good shape for the Lord to come and live within me. There are lot of dirty things in my life. Thing which God detest. He is a pure God. He can live only in a pure heart. And I am here with a dirty heart and mind. My thoughts are dirty. My hand is dirty. My heart is dirty. I am completely unclean. I am covered with sin. (Sin means all kinds of sin, I am ashamed to list it out here) I am in a terrible state.
I don't know how I dare to ask God to come and live within me. I am just like a pig which love to roll around in the mud. I need to undergo a cleansing process. Washing, inside out, with high quality detergent. I doubt many of the stains would not go easily. It will take time and effort to make it clean and pure. One by one the events of sine come in to my thought.
From my childhood to till now I did countless sins. I started to steal coins from my mother for buying sweets. Then I took money from the pocket of my father. I picked mango in the way back from my school. The list goes on. I am ashamed to tell all the sins I did in my life. My ways were wrong. My intentions were wrong. Always I think about myself. I never thought about others.
I wish, if I could reverse my life, I would not do many sins which I did in my life. In short I am not worthy to receive the Holy Spirit. I am not worthy to ask God to come and live within me. Now it is up to God to cleanse me. He needs to more kind to me to clean me. I am sure He will show extraordinary kindness towards me. I remember Jesus shed his blood for my sins. Now I constantly praying My Lord, please cleanse me with the blood of your son Jesus. Just like Paul I could only say that "What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks to Jesus and his sacrifice. Through which I could go to my Lord.
I am praying to Lord. Lord please forgive my sins. Cleanse me. Make me clean and pure. Make me a vessel of you! Come and live within me. Give me a pure heart. Give me a heart which is worthy for you to dwell in.
My heart is heavy now. It will be heavy till it be cleansed by the blood of Jesus. I need Jesus and his love. I want Him to fill my heart with His love. I want the presence of my Lord in my heart. Nothing more than that. Nothing less than that.
I request all of you to pray for me. So that God have mercy upon me. God love me. God have mercy up on me. Cleanse me. Make me pure and holy.