ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Hard Lessons from the Golf Course on Raising Kids

Updated on March 30, 2012

Enjoy your round

I received a beautiful bunch of comments regarding my last article. One that was particularly thought provoking was “Easy for you to say, you’re retired.” That got me to thinking. Now that I’m officially an Abundant Old Soul, how could I help the young people who are just raising kids? Starting careers? Going through hard times? I was on the golf course, that’s what we Abundant Old Souls do…. and a lightning idea hit me. It wasn’t raining. I wasn’t holding a seven iron over my head. Here goes.

The harder you push, the harder it is. That relates to anything. Raising kids, job performance, marriage, goal setting…. name it. When I hold my driver really hard, squeezing the life out of it, that’s exactly what happens. I squeeze the life out of the energy contained in the work I am trying to perform. When I let go and let the energy happen, beautiful things take place. 220 plus drives, high arches, straight to the target hits. The harder you work. The harder you work. You think anyone will care that you stayed late to finish a project instead of making that date with your kids? Your lover? Guess again, sonny.

Over time, I learned that the harder I try to hold on, the harder the kids push away from me. My momma used to say “the first step your children take is a step away from you.” Guide. Encourage. Foster. Want to keep relationships strong? Be strong enough to let go. Even when it hurts like hell.

The faster you go, the less you enjoy. I think that should be tattooed on very parent, newlywed and first year teacher’s forehead. Tattoo it backwards. No bangs allowed. Then, every time a person looks in the mirror, they will read the tattoo and remember to slow down.

I taught school for 34 years. I couldn’t wait for summer. Then I couldn’t wait for retirement. Then retirement came. And went. During the last year of teaching I would often look out the window over a busy street filled with car noise, truck fumes and neighborhood chatter. It was only then I realized that I had the best job in the world. The best kids in the universe. The best life in the galaxy. It only took 34 years to figure that out. See, I’m a slow learner.

Diapers today, weddings tomorrow. It’s that fast. What’s the hurry? Love the journey. Enjoy the fried onion smell of sweaty kids. Close your eyes and see your kid walking away from you on their first day at kindergarten, while they hold a big kid’s hand. Want to trade a Tiffany diamond for that sight? You are poorer than you think.

I’m 80 yards from the green. Sand wedge or pitching wedge? My God, the weight of the world is on my shoulders! What the heck? Go for it and see where it takes you. Thinking is bad for your health! My kid doesn’t have the right shoes! My boss thinks I screwed up! What am I going to do about money?

I went through all that with deciding to retire. I am soo glad I worried soo much. Guess what? The sun came up. All without my help! The world is still here. Did you know that if the history of the planet earth was a calendar, all human history would take up about less than one day of time? That the United States would be in existence for about 2 minutes? How important are we, really? Next time you get shook up; ask yourself “What was the name of the man who built the stable Jesus was born in?”

Now I am on the green! Putting away!! If only I could putt out. My partner is such a better putter than I am. Want your partners Colon cancer? Want his wife’s nagging? How about taking his bills that can’t be paid. Get the point? The grass isn’t always greener on the other side of the green.

I haven’t said anything that you haven’t heard 400 times before. You won’t remember any of this twenty seconds after you read it. But maybe, just maybe, when your kid is crying and your spouse is whining and the bills are late and the grass needs to be cut, you’ll smell the coffee and know that the only thing you have on your side is time. The only thing you have to lose is time. Enjoy. Time.



    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      I love the golfing metaphors. So much can be learned on the golf course. The lessons are endless. Voted your hub up. From this hub and your profile, we have much in common.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)