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Loose Lips, Wagging Tongue, Words That Wound And The Aftermath

Updated on May 2, 2012

Gossip: Casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true.

Let's admit it, we all participate in gossip at some point in our lives. It can be something as innocent as relating a silly story that happened on a girls night out. Totally funny story that meant nothing yet once it's been retold the dynamics of what happened changes. A story that is retold has words added, some removed, some rearranged and what was once an innocent story takes on a whole new meaning.

Gossip begins at a very young age when one person complains about another person. It's innocent, someone is upset and needs someone to talk with and may even ask for advise. The problem is, it normally doesn't end their. The person that was confided in tells another friend and the snowball effect begins, the story becomes bigger and bigger each time it is related to someone else.

The saddest part in relationship to gossip is the impact it can have on a person's life, their reputation, their families, their professional life and their self esteem. Unfortunately when you choose to repeat something you were either told or overheard what you believe to be true may prove to be otherwise. Yet, the moment those words escape your lips and reach someone's ears the damage to another person has begun. It's been proven time and time again that the ignorance of repeating what you've heard isn't necessarily correct.

Peoples lives have changed because of gossip, others have lost their job because someone gossiped, reputations have been tainted because someone gossiped, friendships changed from gossip, families live life's of drama when there's gossip, those who chose to gossip have no idea and some of them don't care that they've changed someone's life based off the stories they've told that lacked the truth.

Of course media plays right into their hands because the majority of the magazine articles in the likes of US Weekly, Star Magazine, National Inquire, OK, In Touch Weekly, Globe and Pop Star are 99 % gossip, nothing in the published articles are confirmed yet take them to be truthful. We thrive on celebrity gossip. It's like we think if we know something we are part of their lives. I guess it's easier to be part of theirs then to retreat into our own.

What about the " water cooler " gossip. How many times have you related a work story based off something you heard that may or may not have been true? There are stories that when related to from one person to another will have words removed or added depending on how they want you to perceive what they are saying.

Throughout the years I've learned to believe half of what I hear and use my own judgement when assessing a situation. On more than one occasion relying on what I heard, basing my decisions or actions on the word of another created a few tense moments and rifts in relationships. Sadly you get to the point that believing certain individuals can be hard because of past experiences. You almost have to ignore what you hear because prior conversations were discovered to be inaccurate, bordering on dishonesty.

I've discovered that I also have to be careful with what I say, who is around and how it comes across. A simple statement, " He wouldn't cheat on his wife, now if you said he gambled I would believe that but cheat never " when repeated to the " he " in that statement was told I said he cheated on his wife. That was done on purpose to put a rift in our friendship. It did for a little while until I explained what happened and he and his wife realized that certain people were purposely trying to cause trouble.

My take on all of this is that, they have self esteem issues that cause them to create drama in someone else life because looking inward into that own issues is to painful a task. I feel sorry for them and hope someday they find their own happiness so they can leave everyone else alone.


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