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Centipede Joke: It Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

Updated on July 15, 2016
A Centipede
A Centipede

Have you heard the joke about the centipede?

The Centipede Joke
There is a story about a lonely man who wanted a useful pet to keep him company. He goes to the pet store hoping to find a pet that would not be much trouble to maintain. The pet store owner is very helpful about describing several pets for the man to consider. Then he remembers that not only would this pet be good company for the man, but it would be useful around the house as well. So the owner insists that a centipede was the most useful pet. He says the centipede could do laundry, vacuum, mop the floor, cook, wash dishes, and clean the entire house in a matter of minutes. Being convinced, the man buys the centipede, takes it home and soon discovers that everything the pet store owner said was true.

He gives the centipede several tasks. It vacuums the entire living room in one minute, mops the kitchen floor in 30 seconds, cooks dinner in one minute, washes the dishes in 30 seconds, and cleans the entire house from top to bottom in only three minutes. The centipede does a week's worth of laundry, folds the clothes and puts them away in less than two minutes. The man knew he had hit the jackpot by purchasing the centipede.

Since the man dreaded grocery shopping, he gives the centipede a list and sends him to the corner store expecting him to be back in a few minutes.

The man marvels at his clean house. He sits down to wait for the return of the centipede. However, he waits and waits and waits. The centipede does not return. Thinking something might have happened on the way to or from the store, the man opens the front door and sees the centipede sitting on the steps. The man yells, "I sent you to the corner grocery store five hours ago. Why are you still sitting here on the steps?"

"I'm going! "I'm going!" the centipede exclaims. "I'm going as soon as I tie up my shoes!"

Do you have a favorite joke?

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    • No_Clue profile image

      No_Clue 6 years ago

      Well now, that's a pretty cute joke!

    • sdy53 profile image

      sdy53 6 years ago

      HaHa...very funny. Even funnier if you don't explain why its funny :)

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 6 years ago from Richmond, VA

      Thanks, for the feedback. I think I will remove the explanation.

    • shannonleigh1976 profile image

      shannonleigh1976 6 years ago from Alpharetta, GA

      Fun! I've not heard that joke, and I enjoyed it! Thanks for the smile today!

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 6 years ago from Richmond, VA

      Thanks for your comment. I'm glad you liked the joke.

    • Time4Travel profile image

      Time4Travel 6 years ago from Canada

      Cute joke! I really enjoyed reading this one.

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 6 years ago from Richmond, VA

      This is one of my favorite jokes. It is nice and clean and one does not know what to expect until the very end!

    • profile image

      Sharejoy 6 years ago

      First time reading this one. Nice and clean, indeed. I must admit, it took me a minute to get it. :)

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 6 years ago from Richmond, VA

      Thanks for reading and responding. That is one of my favorites jokes.

    • Vonnavie Sanchez profile image

      Vonnavie Sanchez 5 years ago

      Good and funny joke, ha.. ha..ha

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 5 years ago from Richmond, VA

      Vonnavie, I am glad you like the joke.

    • profile image

      mohit 5 years ago

      i love your joke ... its spectacular !!

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 5 years ago from Richmond, VA

      mohit, thanks for liking the centipede joke.

    • daisydayz profile image

      Chantele Cross-Jones 4 years ago from Cardiff

      Lol! hehehehehehehe! I love it!

    • revmjm profile image
      Author

      Article Written By Margaret Minnicks 4 years ago from Richmond, VA

      Glad you enjoyed the centipede joke.

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