The First Step In Receiving Is To Desire
Most people settle for so little in life, a woman from church once told me when I was about thirteen. How can one settle for less when there is always more? “That’s easy for you to say,” I wanted to tell her, “when you are quite financially well off.” Remembering that advice years later made me sad, because I had believed her, and knew that part of me knew there was so much more in life for me, and I had the faith that I could find it. But I had gotten side-tracked like so many and lost in the briars and brambles along the way. I too, had settled for less for many years, often to the point of not even having enough money for rent or any spare change to buy an ice cream cone. Yes, those were pitiful days, and I often judged myself for letting myself get so desperate and to stoop so low as to be in such ruts.
“I want it all,” some songs and singers have professed. Entertainers like Madonna can be a bit intimidating to less secure folks, and when I used to hear someone like that make a “I want it all” statement, I both envied and admired them. How dare they demand so much from life and expect to get it when there is so much suffering and poverty in the world?” I would ask Sometimes. “How can they own half a dozen houses, tons of expensive, glamorous clothing, and have the money to do anything they want and be able to get a good night’s rest? Because they want it all,” I heard in my mind. They believe in their dreams enough, that they make them come true.
Now that was an interesting thought. I suddenly wondered if everyone has such capabilities and potential. Can we all have anything and everything we want? Well, maybe, Leslie told me one day, “if we believe in something enough, I think it can happen. Isn’t that what Jesus meant when he said, “if you tell the mountain to fall in the sea and you have no doubt in your heart, that it will happen? It was certainly interesting to have such conversations with Leslie about the unlimited potential we all possess, but I knew that material concerns were not the main priorities in my life. This “more” I was seeking involved so much more. And, yes, I admitted, that my prosperity and abundance was lacking, and that I definitely needed to improve my material lot so I could pursue other interests at leisure. I recalled one day finding a rare used book in a bookstore. It cost $4 dollars and I only had some spare change, and believe it or not, not a single dollar in the bank. “This is the pits,” I told a friend later. He offered to buy me the book, but when we went back it was gone. That incident bothered me a lot, and got me to thinking that there is something to be said about a having a certain amount of material abundance; at least enough to be comfortable. Did I have a lot to learn.