The Power of Compassion, Dreams And Our Goals
Today, March 22, 2010, I took out my two angel cards as I do each day. Today's cards were: Dreams and Compassion. I have found that most of the time I pick out cards that are appropriate and right on. I believe that so-called synchronicities are not at all so-called, but rather reveal deeper more magical and spiritual 'goings on' that are transpiring. The more
aware and open we are to God's and Destiny's little 'blessings' as I like to refer to signs, and synchronicities, the more frequently they tend to appear.
As I looked at the little angel image on the card I whispered the word 'compassion' several times. I thought about my friend Donnie who has been having a rough time not only with his health, and grieving over his friend who died last May, but he also has been beset by financial woes. I visit Donnie about once a month. He lives on a fixed SSI income, and due to poor health has not been able to work the past year after a bad fall damaged his right ankle a few months ago.
Although I am a very positive thinking person, I also am realistic and know that so-called bad things can happen to good people. Yes, I believe that on a higher level everything has meaning and I believe in karma and such metaphysical concepts. This, however, does not take away the element of love and compassion that should be the ruling factor in our lives.
Before I tell today's story about compassion and dreams I need to go back and set the story up by talking about how things were the first two weeks of March when I had planned to visit him. Donnie had emailed me on March 9th saying, I am sorry, Mike, but I don't have any money to go eat at the Golden Corral restaurant or to watch the movie, The Wolf man, we talked about going to see. A surge of sadness washed over me, and tears spilled from my eyes. What could be wrong? I know that Donnie gets his SSI check around the first of each month. He's usually good to go until around the last week of the month. Then I read his p.s. where he said that he had a couple of extra bills this month.
The ironic thing is that just a week before, I had to withdraw six-hundred from my savings account (leaving me a mere twenty-two dollars) to pay for my March rent. I always manage to have a couple thousand stashed away in my account, but for whatever reason/s in February the money just didn't come in like it usually does. And as we all know monthly bills still have to be paid. I am self-employed so do not bring in a weekly paycheck.
My heart was sad that I did not have any money to lend Donnie. At that point, he did not ask me. In response to his 'I am broke' words I told him that I still wanted to come up. I had a book signing fifteen miles away and he had agreed to drive me there and then come back and get me. He had asked me if I could toss in five or ten bucks for gas, and I said, of course I gladly will.
Looking back I see that this was all a test to see if I will stick with my writing dream that I've been pursuing for many years. It's a test to see if I'll sell out, like I did in my last lifetime, as an artist and give up on my dream. Yes, when the tests are strong, it's tempting to throw in the towel and call it quits. I've felt that way so many times, and still do at times. Yet, I believe in my heart and soul, that I have the strength, inner resources, talent and determination to complete in this life time what I failed in the last one. That, after all, is what keeps bringing us back. We have to complete what we did not finish before. The tests keep coming until we pass them each and everyone.
Don't you love all the little, medium and big or super dooper tests that Life and Destiny toss our way? They seem unending at times. So here I was down to twenty-two dollars to my name. But I do have one good thing going for me. I have excellent credit which means I have two credit cards I can use when I need to. After learning from the school of hard knocks many years ago that sometimes we have to start completely over, I went bankrupt and literally started over from rock bottom, slowly crawling my way out of the pit as I refer to it when we are at rock bottom.
Now I am very careful about using my credit cards. I was kind of shocked to look at my bank book and see that I was down to twenty-two dollars, and I had more bills to pay and more were coming in. If I were an ordinary person I'd probably have not gone to visit Donnie, and I may have even cancelled my book signing. But I'm a stickler to my word. If I say I'm going to be there, I will be there even if I have to crawl.
Sometimes I believe it is the willingness to pursue our dreams and our belief in them that can help prod the powers that be, the universe, and our guides to open doors of opportunity for us. One of my ground rules is that I do not go away for travel when I am about 'broke.' Of course, part of me knows that I am never broke. That I am a child of God/the universe, and my needs are always supplied. Yes, part of me knows, and such has turned out to be case since 1999 when I became self-employed full time.
From this experience I have learned that there was some deeper lesson for me to learn. I decided that all I could do was ride out the storm so to speak-this is spite of the fact that my inner child would be flipping and freaking out. I knew that he would be constantly yelling at me, telling me I'm an idiot to go away for three days when I virtually have 'no' money. Well, actually I had a ten dollar bill and two fives that I had stashed in my 'change envelop' in my backpack for change when people buy my book of poetry.
When I got that 'I am broke' email from Donnie on March 9th, naturally a big lump jumped in my throat, and I knew that I had scheduled the book signing three months ago. I sat down and said a little prayer. "Please God and spirit guides, give me just a little sign, or a bigger one, if I've earned it. I really do want to visit Donnie because I know how down he's been over Terry. He talks about dying and wanting to be with him so much, that I fear he may attempt to take his life. I need to be there for him.
I saw the image of an angel in my mind and I heard, "Life is a school with many tests, but many blessings and grace abound for the true and pure of heart whose intentions are noble, loving and compassionate."
"Thank you," I replied. "I am not thinking of myself and I know I always bounce back. I've been through this so many times in the past. It was a way of life for many years when I gave up my teaching career to pursue my dream to be a full-time writer and psychic."
The angel nodded her head. "This, we know, little one. You are such a monk at heart. You trust God to take care of you as your beloved St. Francis of Assisi did. And like brother, Francis, you periodically do a spiritual check-up just to test your faith and to remind yourself how much you do believe in God, your angels and your dreams. All is well," she said, then disappeared.
"God angels and dreams," I said softly. I thought of the nursery song ROW ROW YOUR BOAT life is but a dream. I thought of what she said about me being a monk. I really am detached to material things for the most part and even money, though I want to be attached enough so that I am able to manifest what I need. About ten minutes later the phone rang. A woman booked a reading. Five minutes later it rang again. I kid you not. Another lady booked a reading, both asking if I could fit them in today, which I could.
I thanked the angel and cried a few tears, being so humbled, and actually I laughed to think that a fifty-two year old man could feel so happy even when his bank account was low.
Well, I did not feel happy when it was down to twenty-two dollars. But also, I have learned to listen and watch for the signs that show us 'lessons' from soul and spirit are being imparted to us. The next day a client I had not heard from in a year booked a one hundred dollar reading. The next day March 11th, a lady booked a psychic party for two hours for Monday, March 15th. That was the icing on the cake. In the span of three days I went from twenty-two dollars to four hundred and fifty five. I know most people would think me nuts to trek off to visit Donnie with so little money to my name. But to me, I was a millionaire. I think of the old gospel song, "I'm a poor rich man." One line says, I know that I am poor but I got a lot more than many rich folks that I know."
By now I was actually able to have a little bit of fun with my guides and the universe. Before, my inner child had been all scared, nervous and worried since March 1st when I paid rent from my near last savings. He pounded me mentally and emotionally, fearing that I'll have to do a cash advance on a credit card and live off of it for a month or so. I confess that is a fear I have, but I watch and not let the FEAR grow too much, because that which we fear the most we can manifest. I know all about that as I teach the
'universal law of attraction.'
Friday morning I packed my things and said, "Come on, spirit, bring me on some more dough before I leave for Donnie's. Enough of this poverty mode. Bring on the dough please! I saw this smiley face and a voice said, "turn on your computer and check your emails. I did and there was a request for a regular client wanting to know if I could do an email reading today.
Yippee, horray," I exclaimed, and said, thank you spirit and my spirit guides.
I was planning to give Donnie ten dollars for gas money for taking me to the book signing. It's a fifteen mile drive and he was not only driving me there, he had offered to come and get me when the signing was done at seven p.m. This little voice said, "give Donnie fifteen dollars for gas. That will help him out a little. "But I'll be down to five bucks, I complained. "Never mind. It will come back to you."
"Easy for to say," I wanted to say. "you are a spirit guide who is dead. You can manifest anything you want by thought alone. Easy for you to tell me to give Donnie that fifteen bucks for gas which will make me almost broke."
However, my heart told me this was another test. I thought of Abraham whom God tested, to the point of asking him if he would even sacrifice his son Isaac. Isaac agreed and of course, he passed the test and did not have to kill his son. So I gave Donnie the fifteen dollars.
We had a wonderful time. We enjoyed our Golden Corral lunch, or maybe we over enjoyed it. I always eat too much at buffets and that is why I don't go but about once a month. Otherwise, porky would become my new name. I treated Donnie to the Wolf man movie with Anthony Hopkins (one of my favorite actors) playing the mean daddy wolf.
On Monday I came home and there was an email from Donnie asking if I could lend him fifty dollars until the first of April when he got his SSI check. My stomach churned and I gasped. Yes, I had some money coming in but my car payment was due, and my credit card payments were due, and my electricity, and cell phone were due. I just had enough to pay those bills. At least for the time being. If I had to I knew I could do a cash advance on my credit card, but something told me not to. Part of me was a little hurt that Donnie had the nerve to ask for money after I had practically given him my last dollar and had treated him. I felt a little taken advantage of, even though I could tell that it embarrassed him to have to ask for money.
Although I felt very sad, my spirit guide said, "another lesson here for both you and your friend." I wanted to shout at my spirit guide and tell her to kiss where the sun does not shine," as Dolly Parton used to say. But my heart said, Michael, if you learn this lesson, things will get easier.
Again, I wanted to say, yeah, easy for you to say, spirit guide, you are dead and don't have physical needs and bills to pay and need food to eat, etc. But my intuition told me to listen to my guide. I told Donnie I was so very sorry but I just did not have it. And I was still shocked that for the last few years I've had up to three thousand dollars in my saving account and Donnie never asked me to borrow money.
Again, let us remember, that things are seldom as they appear. When spirit wants us to learn a lesson, anything can happen. Any place. Any time. Any where. And yes, the lessons can even include involvement with money and bank accounts, or the lack thereof, I should say.
That Monday evening I worked my party. More readings followed and now my bills are caught up for April. Fortunately, for my good luck, fortune or karma I have some big psychic fairs, and events booked for April, May, June and August, along with my regular clients and new people who find me on my website, in the phone book and on the internet. Yes, it pays to advertise.
Back to this morning where I drew my two angel cards of Dream and Inspiration. This was exactly one week after Donnie had asked me to borrow the fifty dollars. When I took out my angel card that said "compassion", my guide said, Michael, Donnie is in bad shape now. He's extremely depressed and he has not a penny to his name until he gets his check the first of April. Now that you have more money, you can help a fellow soul in need." I heard the words of Jesus when he said, "in as much as you do this for the least of them (or some such words) you also do so unto me. "Okay," I said, "I'll send Donnie twenty dollars."
"Send him twenty-five," my guide said.
I was tempted to send him the fifty he originally asked for, but my guide said no. "Donnie needs to learn that you are not his bank and that he can't expect you to always bail him out. He could start depending upon you. But you can help him once in awhile when you can. One reason you don't have much extra money now is that you could fall into a trap of giving too much. You would do so out of compassion, but you also must allow others to learn their own lessons. And as you know from years of experience, there are lots of lessons involving money."
I thanked my guide and sent Donnie the twenty-five dollars. He was like a child on Christmas morning, so grateful. Later I ran some errands and standing on the corner was a beggar with the typical homeless sign saying No money. Homeless. I looked into his eyes, and felt such compassion. Yes, I know some people feel nothing but anger at beggars and some will say that the beggars are liars and many live in fancy homes and drive fancy cars from their begging money. Such can be true in certain cases, but I sense this was not the case with this beggar. I only had about .80 in change but I gave it to him and received the typical "God bless you!" words in gratitude.
Lessons. Lessons. Lessons. I kept hearing in my mind as I drove home. Perceptions. Perceptions. Perceptions. Many people would panic or downright freak out to live like I do. To trust the guides, God and the universe to provide for them. I understand where they are coming from, but that is not where some of we dreamers are coming from. I had a comfortable job with a nice salary for several years when I was a school teacher. I had benefits. I had health insurance. Teacher's retirement; the whole nine yards. Yet, my soul was shriveling and dying because my writing dream was neglected and put on the back burner. I was too busy making money and a good living and saving for a rainy day and retirement.
Seeing the beggar helped me to realize that we don't have the right to judge another soul. We don't know what they have to learn in this lifetime. I was told by a psychic that along with being a monk, in several lifetimes, I was also a Rothchild, and very wealthy in other lives. Such does not surprise me, as the books I've read, say that the soul goes through many different lifetimes for different needed learning experiences as part of its growth and evolution.
After I came home, still wishing I had had more money to give the beggar and Donnie, I looked about my apartment. I went in each room and blessed it and thanked God and my guides for my wonderful quiet apt. in this old Victorian townhouse. I have trees in the back yard. Squirrels and critters and birds chirp, sing and delight in the treats I give them. I have my many indoor plants, my many movies, DVD's and cassettes to enjoy. I have my library of wonderful books to read. I have food in the pantry and in the frig and my car will be paid off in four months.
I wanted to write, sing and shout my gratitude for what I do have.
Then I looked on the floor and saw my new book, Morning Coffee With God, that my publisher sent me last week. It was just a year ago on March 29th that my publisher called me and accepted it, after it had been rejected by several other publishers. Then I saw my book of love poetry, Dawn's Kiss, and thought of how much I'm enjoying working with the publisher's marketing specialist on promoting it. Then I thought about my new book God's Many Mansions, that my publisher for Morning Coffee With God, is currently reading, and my other book, Halfway To Heaven, they also agreed to read. I went to my file and located my new book, Love's Joyous Tearful Kiss, that my publisher of Dawn's Kiss is going to consider. I have written some two hundred and fifty poems for the new book, and am presently editing them.
I went into my office and saw my contract for the conference this June in Arkansas that my publisher is having. They are paying all my expenses plus paying me for the Speaker's Talk I will give. And at the speaker's dinner I will get to meet Lindsay Wagner, the bionic woman of the seventies, and Dannion Brinkely, the man who wrote the New York Times best seller, book, Saved By the Light, which was made into a TV movie. With so much going for me, how could I let sorrow and depression defeat me? Yet, I also realize that we are on the earth plane and it takes money to live, until we artists and writers begin earning enough money to pay our bills.
It's been a long haul since I dropped out of my ph.d. program in French literature in 1990 to pursue my writing and psychic dream. So many heartaches along the way. So many times when I didn't have a penny to my name. Yet, when I wrote I felt like a million bucks. And to think that after so many years, I'm finally getting somewhere made me cry. Because when I look into the eyes of the beggar, and my friend Donnie, who grieves his friend and often speaks of the desire to join him, I am humbled.
I wonder what is this 'love of life' or spark in me that has let me go on after enduring so much hardship and a horrible childhood which is detailed in Halfway to Heaven, along with the deep writings and poems, I was given by my guides as part of my healing journey.
I called my opera coach the other day, who is also like a second mother, and dear friend to me. I told her that sometimes I feel like giving up. She said, "No, Michael, you cannot do that. A real writer has to write. You are in your prime. This is the time for you to do your greatest work and to promote yourself. You have come so far. Don't even, for a moment, think to give up."
Her words made me feel better, for I am human, and sometimes I get very discouraged when 'weird' things happen that throw me off, and especially when my bank account dwindles. I begin to question if I'm doing the right thing. Then I have but to look at my old calendars the past eleven years since I became a full time psychic, and I see that I my bills always got paid. Maybe some were close, and a few may have been a few days later, but they were always paid.
I think of the many sacrifices I have made and I think of other writers, musicians, artists, and dreamers who have done likewise. I think of those who are too afraid to go out on a limb for their dreams and my heart goes out to them. I think of my dear friend and social worker, Gloria, who had a dream to be an writer. She would share her stories with me and they were wonderful. But because a teacher had told her when she was nine years old that she had absolutely no talent whatsoever, her ego was permanently wounded and she could never muster the courage to send a single story out.
I wanted to smack that teacher, and say how dare you tell a child such an awful thing. I think of where I read that some publisher told J.K. Rowling to get a day time job. I'm sure he has eaten those words many times over. I agree that the artistic life with all the ups and downs, highs, and lows, uncertainties and so forth are not for everybody. But like Janette said, "if you are a real writer, you have to write." My publisher said something to the effect that it becomes a compulsion. You would rather write than eat. And it's then when the universe will make it happen because you will have given it the energy it needs.
I looked up on the shelf at some quotes I have taped and I read the one that my opera coach, Janette told me 11/23/1997. 'When you are following your star, you don't mind sacrifice nor view it that way. It's a means to and end-your dream!
Tears poured from my cheeks as my soul absorbed and drank the beauty and meaning of those wonderful words from a dear friend of many years, who made many sacrifices for her opera career and dream.
March has been a very interesting month to say the least. It's the time of Spring, fresh birth, new life. New flowers. New beginnings. We experience so many deaths in our lives that lead to new life. I do not regret for one moment the decision to going out on a limb for my writing and psychic dream. I know in my heart of hearts that I will always bounce back like Dolly Parton sings in the song from the musical "Best Little Whorehouse in Texas."
I will also keep tuned into my guides and be open to the learning that is involved in situations that seem to be 'negative.' I jokingly say that if I dropped dead this very instant, I would go out with a bang! And go out with a bang I most certainly would. I have said 'yes to life' as one of my poems says. I am willing, ready and able to make any and all sacrifices it takes to manifest my dreams. And, yes, I know that I will be reading these words from time to time when I am being challenged such as March 2010 was very challenging for me.
I reread this hub/article as a part of the final editing, and I felt the presence of my dream and my muse so close by that I even sensed a tangible feminine presence filling me with love and passion-that presence is my own beloved muse. I believe that we all possess a muse as well as guardian angels and spirit guides. My muse refers to herself as "Dresda." She came to me many years ago in a meditation. I saw her long shiny black hair, and was lost in her deep emerald green eyes. When I asked her who she was she said, "I am flame. I am fire. I set in motion the heart's desire."
I got so fired up that I said a little prayer the next morning when I woke up at 7 a.m. "Please, beloved muse and spirit, bring me a new male intellectual friend. I miss having deep conversations." This was a simple prayer from my heart and soul. When I checked my emails awhile later I had received three comments and compliments on articles I had written on www.selfgrowth.com. I also received an email from a certain writer who is an English professor, and translator of some of the esoteric French works of Victor Hugo and a writer on paranormal topics. Below is what he said.
Subject: Victor Hugo and his conversations
I just now read your nice words, in WISE SEERS OF YESTERDAY, about my book CONVERSATIONS WITH ETERNITY: THE FORGOTTEN MASTERPIECE OF VICTOR HUGO.
You might be interested to know that in January 2008 Inner Traditions published a corrected, greatly revised, much expanded (more translations of seance transcripts, much more information about the day-to-day ups and down of V.H. and his grown children including Adele on Jersey island, more discussion about what a seance is) version of my book with the title VICTOR HUGO'S CONVERSATIONS WITH THE SPIRIT WORLD: A LITERARY GENIUS'S HIDDEN LIFE.
For info, please go to .......
I about fell over from ecstatic shock. I had mentioned this author's wonderful book Conversations With Eternity-The Forgotten Masterpiece of Victor Hugo in a former hub entitled "Wise Seers of Yesterday." Apparently he discovered it and read the positive comment I made about his book. Well, I asked my muse and guide for an intellectual friend. How much more clear could they be in taking my call and relaying it telepathically to this prolific writer/professor/paranormal researcher. I was astounded as I thought about the implications of telepathy and recall many of my own experiences which I talk about in my books. Again I was reminded that we are never alone, no matter how dark the darkest night may seem.
Our guides do work and serve us. I wrote the professor a letter just yesterday. Will I hear back from this professor? That is not for me to say, but what is important is that his email encouraged me to reread his wonderful book, which by the way, two days prior I had noticed it on my bookshelf. I saw a little light in my mind, and I thought I need to read that book again. For I have always been a deep admirer of Victor Hugo and the other French and English 19th century poets and writers. Again, my call went out, my guides sent forth the message and the response was soon forthcoming. Let us never forget the power of prayer, telepathy and the wonderful resources of our own subconscious mind and our guides.
I went to amazon and located the revised book this author suggested I might be interested in. The Secret Life of Genius-How 24 great men and women were touched by spiritual worlds. I knew I'd be ordering this book very soon. On the blurb was mentioned The Red Book by Carl G. Jung, one of my all time favorite psychiatrists/writers, automatic writing seances by William Butler Yeats, writings by Sir Isaac Newton and much more. To be reminded that so many wonderful writers, doctors etc. were also very involved with the spiritual and metaphysical realms made my heart leap with joy. I've always been a deeply intellectual man but I've also always been interested, deeply involved and in contact with the spiritual and 'unseen' realms.
After having such a difficult month financially, my heart was now overflowing with renewed vigor and commitment to my writing dream and further delving and exploration into paranormal 'other realms'. I think of the saying "do what you love and the money will be there." I took out my 19th century French literature from my graduate studies at the University of Cincinnati back in the early 1990's.
I scanned and read up on some of my all time French favorite writers: Lamartine. Baudelaire. Alfred de Vigny. Alfred de Musset. Victor Hugo. Paul Verlaine. Gerard de Nerval and Rimbaud. They all seemed to be winking and greeting me through time. I have been told I was a French poet during that era. I am not at all surprised as I felt so at home when I studied in France, and I learned fluent French in two years. Europeans never thought I was American, and I jokingly say I am a born and raised 'hick' from Kentucky, being born in Bardstown, KY, the city of the 'bards.'
And yes, soon after indulging in some intellectual festivity, my phone soon rang and several clients booked appointments. My bills are caught up for another month. This may sound like a reckless irresponsible way to live, but it works for me. I have been fully self-employed as a psychic, spiritual counselor, singer, writer, for the past eleven years. I am happy. Money comes and goes. Challenges come and go, like the waves and tides, but the joy I derive from my spirit and other worldly encounters make life on this world bearable.
I know that I shall always have what I need when I need it. This has been promised to us by beloved Master Sananda, Jesus the Christ when he said ask and you shall receive. Knock and the door shall be opened. Each sacrifice I make for my writing dream and art is a knock. So I say to you, dare to say, "Knock. Knock. Who's there?" And knock." You just never know what wonderful adventure, guide or new spirit friend might show up. I have so many friends show up now that I don't even watch TV. What a bore!
Shakespeare said life is a stage, and we are in a grand play. We create it all. Truer more profound words have never been spoken. Speaking of which, I shall eagerly call the yellow pages representative tomorrow to see about reopening my singing telegram business. I will get to custom design, write, and perform funny, sentimental telegrams in my jester outfit. Laughter is medicine for the soul. May we spread all that we can as well as compassion. And may we never abandon our dreams no matter how 'bad' things may appear. I totally believe that if we believe in our dreams, that they will believe in us and that with total devotion, faith, and hard work, The sky is the limit which is the title of one of my favorite author's, Dr. Wayne Dyer's, many books.
There is unlimited power in our dreams and goals and when we extend the hand of charity and compassion to our fellow humans, charity has a way of paying us back. Down to my last few dollars, I sent a friend in need $25.00. I know it made his day and that he would stretch the money until he received his SSI check the first of April. I could feel his energy shift as some hope infiltrated his being where despair and depression had been. I thought of the countless times I was down on hard luck as the saying goes and the times that some help and kindness was extended to me.
I know that giving to others is always a means to soul growth, and money, is but one means to give and spread love and hope to others. I also know that challenges and obstacles will come up to test me and make me stronger and I am up for the challenge as I encourage you to be. With each obstacle we overcome, we become stronger and that is one reason they are presented to us, and yes, they sure do 'suck' at times. I know that from many experiences.
I also know that I shall always have what I need when I need it for that 'monk' part of my soul essence is much stronger than any fears that besiege my inner child from time to time. There is so much more to all of us than we can begin to imagine. This is why the Greeks said, "Know thyself." If we do not come to know 'self' we certainly cannot 'know' or experience true intimacy with anybody else. It all begins with 'self' as the seer Edgar Cayce was fond of saying.
When I need a little psychological and emotional lift I think of two Eleanor Roosevelt quotes: "You must do the thing you think you cannot do" and "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." After so many years of heartbreak and struggle I have come to believe in my dreams, and even though my inner child and ego get scared and worry at times, I believe that my dreams and talent will not abandon me. They will help them come to fruition and manifestation. I believe in your dreams as well, dear reader and I hope and pray that you do as well!
Michael Dennis (513) 281-5696 - author Halfway to Heaven, Dawn's Kiss, a collection of nearly love 200 poems that explores the many faces and facets of Love, and Morning Coffee With God, from Ozark Mountain Publishing. Cincinnati, OH. Profile: Psychic, Spiritual Medium, Author as seen on Fox, CBS, Jerry Springer, heard on MOJO, MIX, Q-102 radio in Cincinnati, Michael Dennis offers a variety of Psychic Readings to meet your needs. He offers In-Person, Telephone and Email Readings. To order his books or to book a Psychic Reading please contact him directly. Please visit his website at www.mikethepsychic.com for more information or email him at firstname.lastname@example.org