Traits of a Bully?
Born a 'Bully, live a bully's life, die as a bully"
Some people are born with inherent aggressive behaviors. Science, even isolated the extra 'Y' Chromosome which they believe contributes to aggressive/dominate behaviors in people. That being said we can contend that some people are born with that extra bit of aggression that other babies may not have. 'Bully' traits may be encouraged in infants and children, as parents want to believe that they may have a future 'little Einstein, Olympic athlete, or next Prime Minister. Essentially, many of the same traits that are identified in a 'bully' are many of the same traits that are groomed/refined in many successful world leaders. We expect world leaders to be aggressive, strong, controlling, intimidating, heroic, courageous, dominating, and in some cases 'warriors for the cause.' These are the traits that we look for in people to be our leaders. So where are we going wrong, why do we have the 'out-of-control-bully' at the schools, buses, on the NET., as well as in the nursing homes, and senior citizen' s clubs. I recently spoke to an 82 year old, who said that she will not attend senior activities at one of the local Senior Centers because she feels bullied by another member that attended the same facility. Another elderly gentleman living in a local nursing facility, reported that he would not go to the dining hall because he felt like he was being bullied by another male resident, and sometimes staff. We can conclude that 'bullying traits' are not traits that eventually, a person will outgrow. No, rather these traits follow the individual to the grave. So why then do some people with these traits turn out as leader while others as criminals? What are we as parents doing to 'groom/raise,' the good and desirable behaviors and leadership traits, while diminishing the possibility of producing the opposite (criminal bully)?
One of the dilemmas is that of channeling the 'bully traits' in children so that these aggressive behaviors are channeled into producing good/strong leaders with sound decision making skills. Could it be that if the 'bully traits' are identified and directed in babies/children to and for the better of society as a whole, to the point that the malicious bullying will no longer exist? We have 'criminal bullies,' we need to look at how they were raised, what did we, as parents, do or not do to encourage the 'bad bully' behaviors in that person/child. We know that many behavioral attributes are inherited, genetics and yet many are strictly environmentally induced. Many of the 'bad bully' characteristics will be traced to the environmental and nurturing experiences the individual endures. Thus the 'bully traits' are here to stay, now how do we turn them into 'good' or use their bully traits for the good of society?