Why Are Some Women So Evil? A Look at Bullying
We all know who they are. They are the cliquish girls in class who make fun of the one or two sensitive girls in class bringing their self-esteem down to the depths of non-existence and allowing them no confidence in the school years to come. Some people are so unlucky they have the same group all through school that can’t be changed. We have seen them-the evil girls in numerous movies, like Carrie and Mean Girls and so many others. The soul crushing popular girls that can make school days hell for other people. Many of us have experienced dealing with them, if you put chum in the water, any kind of sensitivity being the chum, they are like sharks in the water circling ready to tear you to bits.
Working in mental health, I have seen clients (girls) that were emotionally scarred from bullying. One had symptoms similar to PTSD, nightmares and anxiety symptoms as a young adult. Yes, it can be that bad. If you tell people to, “Keep a stiff upper lip” that are going through this kind of harassment and trauma as a parent, who do they have to turn to?
But what happens to these girls that are so evil in school when they are adults? Do they suddenly change to sweet functional adults? No, for the most part they don’t. They become adult bullies. Like they were in school, in the business world they will walk over whoever and whatever to get what they want. They will probably be incredibly successful in a lot of what they do. But they won’t mince words and they will still have the “Bully” mentality, committing soul crushing acts just as they did in school.
In today’s world of feminism, which I am a staunch supporter of, paying my dues when I can to the National Organization for Women occasionally and championing women’s rights on a regular basis living in a state that is antiquated in views on women’s roles, people are proud to be a "bitch." However, I find that when in a time period when women flourish and are proud to be “bitches” that is an excuse for some of these toxic women to come out in full force as a bully and feel that this is acceptable. But don’t be fooled this isn’t the liberated woman, but the excuse to be a bully. Feminists wouldn’t be cruel to other women that is the sisterhood piece.
Don’t get me wrong, this is mainly to other women that these bullies behave this way. The dynamics generally are different with men. I will never forget studying primatology as I had to take this for my anthropology degree. I studied Chimpanzees which I found hardly any different in their politics then humans. There was plotting, lying, overthrowing of the alpha male chimp, you name it. Chimps have the analytical thinking ability to know how to deceive. They are self-aware. But what interested me the most was the interplay between the females in a Baboon colony. There was a female alpha Baboon, she terrorized the females lower on the totem pole. She would do things like grab their infants from their hands and be physically aggressive to them while the mother would stand there helplessly. To one female of the colony, the alpha female made it a point to make her life miserable on a daily basis.
You think that with our frontal lobes being as large as they are and the ability to empathetic thought that we would have evolved past our less evolved cousins, but apparently this is not the case. The thing is that sad is that this can go on throughout these individuals’ lives into old age. Most of the time they will have no retaliation, nothing to stop them and will learn nothing from their dysfunctional behavior. I guess we can only hope for Karma in some cases that it may slam them full force at some point in their life. But that is not likely to happen.
How did these women get to be this way? What caused this? Most of the bullies that I Have known didn’t have families that were abusive that I was aware of, they were usually highly motivated and were involved in a lot of activities in school and had a lot of friends. The popular kids. So what caused the character flaw? Some kind of genetic aspect? I have always questioned this but you think that with the strides we have made to be civilized and advanced that things like this wouldn’t happen anymore. But despite the computer age and all we have accomplished as a society, bullying women still exist and more than ever. But then so do things such as war too. I guess you will never get the unevolved primate out of the human.