How can others be taught self-sufficiency instead of constantly depending upon o

1. 86

   gmwilliamsposted 7 years ago

   How can others be taught self-sufficiency instead of constantly depending upon others?
   
   

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2. 57

   Deslandresposted 7 years ago

   Very simple, just stop doing what really doesn't need to be done. I had to cut the apron strings as soon as I realized I was slowly becoming a slave to an elderly man who could've easily helped himself but chose not to.  Anytime you choose to live alone no matter your age, there comes a certain level of responsibility expected of autonomy. When I learned he was also dependent on others, I started wondering why he wasn't in a nursing home. You couldn't mention nursing home to him because he would get mad and fly off the handle, he had a temper! It took a strong person to stand up to him and get the last word in edgewise even if it meant a heated argument. The best thing to do is to cut the apron strings and just not do what you're being ordered to do, just don't do it. Make them do it by saying if you want it done then do it yourself. One time I was on the nebulizer when he wanted me to pour him a drink but my  I was busy because my hands were full. He ended up throwing a glass just because I wasn't right there when he wanted me at that split-second. It was his glass and fortunately he threw out the other way or the cops would've been there. I told him i'm not gonna jump and run every time someone calls, I'm not a slave. He timed it just right and knew how to get you at the worst possible times, one time I had to lay down when I was starting to overheat and I had to go home to lay down so I wouldn't get ill, I have that type of disability. He got mad at me because I wouldn't jump and run previously and out I had to go home because he kept his apartment too hot and I had to get out and go home before I got sick. He had the nerve to time it just right and wait until he knew I was laying down at home to call and get his key back that he'd given me in case of an emergency. I didn't jump, I made him wait. When I got up about a half hour later, I went and quietly taped the key to his door and left

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3. 0

   threekeysposted 7 years ago

   Grace, I need context here to respond. But respond I will. No one wants to be used, manipulated or treated as a slave.
   In my lifetime I have aimed and strived to be autonomous. How I perceived autonomy and how that autonony has panned out? You can never be literally autonomous. We all are reliant on each other to directly or indirectly make our lives work on a daily basis. If we are in between relationships then we depend on the nurturance/sustenance of our friends or family. NO ONE can do it alone. So self sufficiency means to me now, if someone or something wants to leave, I can intellectually say goodbye with goodwill. It may still be very hard emotionally for me but "understanding everything and everyone has their time" helps me to deal with it. That is, what I brand self sufficiency to mean for me at this point in time. What about you?

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4. 84

   tsmogposted 7 years ago

   Dependency is a fact of life. To eat I depend on a plant. For money I must work or have investment returns. I am dependent in both cases. The money comes from someone / somewhere else. In other words self-sufficiency follows dependency. They are not mutually exclusive.
   
   So, next, do we question what one is dependent of for money?

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