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How Not to Let an Arrogant Ass Mess with Your Mind

Updated on June 7, 2011

We Must Guard Our Sub-conscious Mind

Charles Haanel, writer of the infamous MasterKey System, speaks about the "world within" and how it dictates what will manifest into our reality or circumstance. The world within is your sub-concious mind. In more simplistic terms, what you think about, you bring about. When we study and learn more about the power of our subconsious mind we understand how important it is to guard or protect it. Really, that is the biggest job your conscious mind has! To protect and to decipher for the sub conscious mind.

The sub-concious mind does not differentiate any information that is presented to it. It does not "think". It simply accepts messages as truth. Imagine if your subconscious mind is continuously being given erroneous information and accepts it as truth without question. We must take measures to use our conscious mind to assess, accept or reject information.

Now, you can consciously reject information, but if you subject your self to the same bad information repeatedly, you are going to hamper your progress. You see, it is not just what you think about the information presented, but how you feel about it that will determine what you actually manifest. The intensity and frequency of those feelings matters - a lot.

For example, if you are working in an atmosphere where your ideals conflict with the policies and/or procedures, you are placing yourself in a position of having to continuously "filter", and along with that filtering, you are likely experiencing negative thoughts and feelings. It bogs you down and interferes with your personal progress. Without re-writing the MasterKey System or the Science of Getting Rich, or other great publications on the subject, let me just say it is vitally important that we choose our affiliations wisely.

As creators of our own destiny, we have the right and the responsibility to choose who we surround ourselves with. Admittedly, there are some relationships that may be detrimental to your development that you cannot just leave. This is particularly true when we consider our family. Like they say, you don't get to choose your family! You may have a family member who is less than supportive. There are measures you can take to protect yourself and your psyche from a negative family member - we'll deal with that another day.

While you can't necessarily choose your family members, you CAN choose your business partners. You can choose your leaders and you can choose what kind of leader you want to be. So how do you know who to listen to? Who to "hang out" with? It is not always simple. Allow me to illustrate with a real life example from my own experience, one that inspired the writing of this article.

The King and His Subjects (aka minions) My Personal Dilemma...

I have been part of a "mastermind" group that is led by a truly brilliant individual. I have great respect for his skill set and am desirous of learning from him. The struggle comes in how I feel about being a member of this group. The overall atmosphere is not always positive, and it is my opinion that the leader has an ego issue. By that I mean that he either has an inflated ego, or he is masking insecurity. He has quite a large following of, what I refer to as, minions. The minions are quick to lavish him with praise and admiration, and he appears to thrive on it. Those of you who know me, know that I have little patience for the arrogant and self serving...

Those in the group who do not engage in praising the leader (the free thinkers) receive little to no positive recognition. Virtually everyone in the group is "afraid", or at least hesitant, to voice opinions that oppose or challenge the leader's. The tone is frequently condescending, and those brave enough to present an idea or thought not supporting those of the leader are shut down quickly - often in a humiliating way.

Even as I type that, and reflect on it, I am asking myself... what could the dilemma be? Clearly this is not a healthy environment! You may be thinking the same thing. You may be thinking that you would not remain in such a group; at first glance, I would certainly be thinking that way! And if it was as black and white as it "appears" here explained in text, it would be simple. But real life isn't that black and white. Some of the members of this group would think I was crazy, that my perceptions are way off. They may not share my beliefs about the leader and especially the minions, may feel very positive about the atmosphere.

All the Cool Kids are Doing It

That's the thing about being an individual. Two people living the exact same experience, can in fact have two very different experiences - it's all about perception. In the scenario I just described, many people may be feeling and thinking much as I am, but they are so desirous of being a part of the group, of being accepted by the leader and his minions, that they will even go so far as to CHANGE their own ideals. Don't roll your eyes or laugh. Think about when you were in high school and the things you would do or say to be accepted into the "cool" gang. It truly takes a strong and confident person to withstand peer pressure. A group of wannabe pro marketers is very similar to the teenager finding his or her way in the world. An otherwise confident and self reliant adult can become an awkward gangly teenager seeking acceptance.

In addition, the struggle may also be that there is some great content and there is much that one can learn if able to separate the "politics" from the content. Theoretically, I know that I CAN do that. I can take what works for me and leave what doesn't, but my concern is what this environment, this exposure will do to my mindset. Am I doing an adequate job of protecting my subconscious mind? To find the answer to that, I need to pay attention to my thoughts and feelings.

At least once per day, I feel anger about something that occurs in my example mastermind group. Frequently it is because an individual is humiliated. Other times I feel irritated by the "politics" and then there are times that I am entertained and amused by it. Still other times, I watch in fascination at the various personalities and how they react. More than anything, my interest in human psychology keeps me in the group. Watching the leader and the minions is, in its own right, educational.

Given that it is our feelings that have the greatest impact on what we manifest, my decision must be to either focus only on the positives, or if that proves too difficult, to leave the group. If this was a job that I was dependent upon for income, it would behoove me to focus on that job as being a stepping stone in my journey to my end goal. Viewing the job as a necessary step in my progression would cause me to feel genuine gratitude.

In my actual situation however, I could quite possibly learn the same skills through another venue; one that is more in sync with my ideals. If that is the case, my progress would most likely be more swift. I think I may have made my decision... but I'm curious...

WWYD? (What Would You Do?)


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    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Thought provoking hub here. I agree with your first sentencing that we must guard our subconscious mind. A lot of times in different career lines and even in personal relationships, this is at play.

      I'm like you too, I like to study human psychology, which for the most part, isn't acceptable especially when I explore these topics to write. It doesn't necessarily have to be about people in general, and I am not in any way associated with those the whole time, 24/7. In fact, my thoughts are abstract, none about people and mostly it's about what I feel, hear and observe. As a growing writer, I add on some of my own individual thoughts and feelings, to make it lively, engaging and I hope the mass audience out there who might "feel" or "think" the same like me, would get it. Then my mission's accomplished. Like I have impart certain of my feelings to the mass media, in Internet form that is. Oops, I tend to be go slightly off topic, sorry that's just me. And if in anyway I have offended anyone or anything, I'm sorry but that's their misunderstanding to clear because my conscience is clear.

      I have done no wrong, and I just write with my gut feeling, which doesn't have to target certain individuals. That's my style of writing which I think not many people can take. It may be bad writing or poor writing whatever, but it is mine. And I own it and I'm being original about it.

      In short, it's like looking at a power group and being a follower or some sort. The one flowing strong, then that should be the one we should follow. I see a lot of these happenings and the ones that make their own path, without really following the "flow" or should I say "strong flow", I really want to give them a pat at the back and shake their hands.

      Like you have mentioned, it all boils down to individual character, perception and what the individual wants for him/herself. I hope I don't go too astray with this one. Thanks for this hub. Had a great read. If anyone out there needing my advice, I'd say be original and don't imitate others. Stand up for yourself and look at your surroundings before judging too easily. Hub up.=)

    • profile image

      \Brenda Scully 

      9 years ago

      with the current climate.... job wise etc, it is not always easy to make the right choices, sometimes you have to just stick around things simply to earn a living, do you agree

    • lmmartin profile image


      9 years ago from Alberta and Florida

      As in all relationships -- if the bad outweighs the good, run.

    • Bo Bixbie profile image

      Bo Bixbie 

      9 years ago from Mid-West

      What if you're just an ass? Does it still apply?

    • Mighty Mom profile image

      Susan Reid 

      9 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

      What I would do is make a pros and cons list. Benefits of staying in the group vs. benefits of leaving. Cons of staying in the group vs. cons of leaving. See which list provides the most compelling arguments. Although, from what you describe, your concerns about the group far outweigh your admiration for its leader. How can you respect a leader who uses humiliation and favoritism to this degree? How can you relate to a bunch of sycophantic, masochistic followers? Get out and don't look back. There is a better way for you to improve your mind/life. You will not find it unless you open yourself to it. You cannot open yourself to it if you are embedded in this group. MM

    • Karen Weir profile imageAUTHOR

      Karen Weir 

      9 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Thanks Kirsten!

      Tom, thanks for your comments.  I truly value your opinion, and LOVE Judi's website!

    • profile image

      Tom Munson 

      9 years ago

      WWYD is the question of the year Karen, and I'm thinking that you have already made that decision.

      However, sometimes these dilemma's drive us crazy and affect our thinking in a large way by giving us thoughts like, we are indespensible to the group or, what are my other friends in the group going to do after I leave.

      There is a thought process going on in you that will require some consideration.

      It is those love, hate, thoughts.

      You may love a lot of the members of the mastermind group and have a preliminary feeling of lonliness that you think you may encounter after your departure.

      Then, on the other hand there is the feeling of relief that you are anticipating because you wont be dealing with the bully any more.

      Back to the question, WWYD (what would you do).

      As you know, I did leave such a group and in all honesty, even tho I did have those previously describe feelings, I am glad I did.

      It gave me that long needed feeling of independance that I had been longing for for awhile prior to my leaving.

      So, my advice, cut the tie, can't be more blunt than that, and all the best to you and your family.

      There is more on Judith's website that may help with the dealings with "those kinds of people".

    • profile image

      Kirsten Plotkin 

      9 years ago

      Hi Karen, As always I enjoyed your hub. Thank you for inviting me to have a look.

    • Karen Weir profile imageAUTHOR

      Karen Weir 

      9 years ago from Alberta Canada

      jjrubio - I love all that she symbolizes. Women like your grandma...goldentoad - being self aware is a great thing... might even make up for being tremendously arrogant!

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      I like your avatar Rosie the Rivetter...My grandma was one of the best Welder/Rivetters on El Toro Marine Base during WWII. So that pic makes me think of her...nice!

    • goldentoad profile image


      9 years ago from Free and running....

      I am tremendously arrogant!

    • Karen Weir profile imageAUTHOR

      Karen Weir 

      9 years ago from Alberta Canada

      hmmm interesting toad... does that mean you are an arrogant ass? lol joking of course!

    • goldentoad profile image


      9 years ago from Free and running....

      I'm not really buying into the philosophy as I tend to get dirty with life and negative energy, but I enjoyed the read


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