15 Things That Will Rogers Didn't Say
I don't have much to say
about Will Rogers, American icon, humorist, film star, radio political commentator that has not already been said. And I have even less to say about the man who coined numerous phrases that we not only recall today, but often say if only to maybe impress who we are talking to at the moment.
Oh, do not misunderstand me, as most people do. I would love to write something that no one has ever dreamed of writing about this humble, gestured man we refer to as "Will Rogers," lover of cowboy ways and broad stretches of Oklahoma territory where he just happened to be born.
I guess I will wait and see where (this) piece takes me, but with a headline like this:
How can I go wrong?
15.) " . . .Hey, talk about them Communists. I love them old boys. I just happen to know that they have only one color, red, and that beats trying to keep up with a lot of colors at my age."
14.)" . . .Women going to work? Why not? Truth be known, most women had rather work for pay for another man than slave at home for nothing for another one."
13.) . . ."I am not a lover of politics. But I do like beef stew. These days there's not much difference."
12.) . . ."Dogs are like politicians. Both of them howl and scratch."
11.) . . ."If you like to take a snort of whiskey now and again, go to it, friend. But do not try to fry me some eggs for breakfast afterwards."
10.) . . ."Awww, some of you married folks bellyache about your mates and I see your point. But why spend money divorcing them when you can buy a new truck with that money?"
9.) . . ."I almost stepped on a cat's tail yesterday coming out of my motel. What he was doing in the restaurant is still a bit fuzzy to me."
8.) . . ."Did you ever see a bunch of growed men when they sit down to play Poker? It's like they are just daring each other to be next to hand out their rent money to a stranger."
7.) . . ."Raising kids ain't no job. You can get fired from your job, but you can't get fired from raising your kids."
6.) . . ."Hollywood is a lot like Texas: Big, wild and sometimes you get stuck in your behind by a cactus plant."
5.) . . ."Hey, let me tell you. I got off my train in Chicago last week and this bum stumbled up to me and said, 'hey, old man. You can just haul off and bite me," in a rude way. I laughed and replied, "Okay. Are you an apple?"
4.) . . ."Folks, let me tell you. Don't waste your time looking up all the time. Do some work. All you will take home if you gaze upward is bird dung."
3.) . . ."A man may have a lot of dough, but without a turkey, he will starve."
2.) . . ."I don't like war, folks. No, sir. Who likes laying in mud, bullets whizzing past you and a loud mouth at your back yelling at you to charge?"
1.) . . ."Yeah, friends. I speak two languages. No hiding that fact. I speak English and western. Sometimes some southern."
Question: Do you think that I have accomplished my dream of writing something about Will Rogers that no one else ever dared to write?
And a peaceful good night, Okalona, Mississippi.
This is a film clip from a silent film where Will Rogers performs complex rope tricks.
© 2016 Kenneth Avery