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About getting old...G-Ma pokes fun...:O)

Updated on April 5, 2009

iT MAY SAY "THIS VIDEO IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE BUT CLICK ON THE FIRST PICTURE ON THE FAR LEFT OF THE MAN IN THE SHIRT AND IT WILL PLAY...IS VERY GOOD :O)

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Getting Old can be a bother or it can be fun...when I was young 60's & 70's seemed very far away and I honestly never believed I would ever be a Grandmother...since my biological father died at the young age of 35 of a heart attack, and it runs in the family , I was sure I was doomed.....

But here I am... and now getting used to being called old, and even being old..but is not so terrible , I get discounts and special spots to park... I can poke fun at everything from hair loss to weight gain...gaps in my vocabulary to very embarrassing mishaps...miscommunications...memory lapses...hearing problems...age is a wonderful thing, and everyone will one day be in my spot...feeling very young at heart, but the body is slowing down...

Ever been cleaning in one room and go to put something in another and wonder why you are there? Than start doing something in that room... well they tell us that this is all normal, and I did the same things when I was  raising my 3 children, but some how being '69' they think you are losing it...

I have lost some things but not my desire for life and for God and for friends and Family...I found a few jokes I want to pass on and I have no Idea who wrote them...Hope you enjoy and remember Laugher is always good....

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades.

Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards..

One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, 'Now don't get mad at me .. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought And thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.' Her friend glared at her.

For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, 'How soon do you need to know?'

Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together.

 One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath?'

The 94-year-old yells back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see..' She starts up the stairs and pauses 'Was I going up the stairs or down?

The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters, she shakes her head and says, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood.' She then yells, 'I'll come up and help Both of you as soon as I see who's at the door.'

'I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!'

Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the Other, 'Windy, isn't it?' 'No,' the second man replied, 'it's Thursday.' And the third man chimed in, 'So am I, Let's have a beer.'

DEAR LORD,

So far today, am I doing alright? I have not gossiped,lost my temper, been greedy, nasty, selfish, or self-indulgent. I have not whined, complained,cursed, or eaten any chocolate. I have charged nothing on my credit card.

But I will be getting out of bed in a minute, and I think that I will really need your help then!!!

 

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    • Cris A profile image

      Cris A 8 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      LOL G-Ma! I love the Single Ladies joke (ie the 3 sisters)!

      I hope when I get to your age I'd have the same state of mind and sense of humor that you have. You are such a positive energy on this site! Thanks for sharing! Hugs :D

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 8 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Lol! You may be old, but you are so very young at heart! Love you!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Cris A... here you again first one...Liking your new avatar...cool ! ! ! and there is no other way to be when one gets old...Laughter is a big thing...Laughter is God's Sunshine...Awww you are just gonna be wonderful...wish I would be around then? but I will be watching anyway...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace XXOO

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Pest...Hi hun..did the video work? It is so funny..and thank you too sweetie...My heart does feel young but then after the life I have been through I guess it has no other way to feel...not complaining just wiser ?? now..HEE HEE...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 8 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      My last birthday a co worker had asked me how old I was...i told him...He says,"Daaaaaaaaaamn! You have seen some pretty rough miles!". he was serious as all get out too!

    • Sally's Trove profile image

      Sherri 8 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

      The Tom Rush says it all, and so do you...love what you say about "I did the same things when I was raising my 3 children." Amen. We only look different now.

      Cheers to you, G-Ma.

    • Benjimester profile image

      Benji Mester 8 years ago from San Diego, California

      Haha, this is awesome G-ma! I like the joke about the three sisters the best I think. You're definitely not old yet... you still have a great sense of humor. I love listening to your thoughts on life, even when it's just in jest. You know how to express yourself in a way that I really connect with. Thank you.

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      PEST...am sorry you have been through a lot...take it easy and be good...thanks .. G-Ma...:O) Hugs

      SALLY,,yes that is so true...actually was gonna say that in here but my mind wonders...hee hee thanks for coming by sweetie...G-Ma :O) Hugs

      BENJI...awww how sweet of you and am glad I matter...We are a nice Family of people here and you all help me feel younger..Thanks...G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • agvulpes profile image

      Peter 8 years ago from Australia

      So...........what is your name again? They keep telling me look up at the top. oh yeah G-Ma J. It is good when we "oldies" can laugh at ourselves!

      Now where did I put that coffee! LOL

      God Bless you G-Ma :-[)

    • eovery profile image

      eovery 8 years ago from MIddle of the Boondocks of Iowa

      Love ya G-ma, Youy still have a sense of humor!

      Keep on hubbing!

    • Teresa McGurk profile image

      Sheila 8 years ago from The Other Bangor

      I love your sense of humor. Getting older has opened my eyes and my heart to a lot of things I was sure I would never do when I got older. . . somewhere along the way, ya just pick your dignity back up off the floor, dust it off, and carry on feeling young inside. Thanks for this laughter.

    • k@ri profile image

      k@ri 8 years ago from Sunny Southern California

      I loved that first joke so much, I had to read it to my daughter! I also loved all the others! Isn't it fun to get older, people expect you to forget things...things that when you forgot when you were younger, they would get mad about! :)) Beautiful Hub!

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      What a treasure you are, G-Ma! This was a great hub, and the video was PERFECT! I find myself doing the going-from-room-to-room thing way too often!

      Thank you for sharing the jokes. They are great!

    • Melody Lagrimas profile image

      Melody Lagrimas 8 years ago from Philippines

      :) You have not lost your touch. Great hub, thanks.

    • earnestshub profile image

      earnestshub 8 years ago from Melbourne Australia

      Hilarious hub G-Ma. It is best to laugh as there is not much else to do about getting old!

    • Triplet Mom profile image

      Triplet Mom 8 years ago from West Coast

      That is hilarious, I could not stop laughing. Said thing is that I am just as forgetful as the 90 year olds. My kids have started calling me and my husband old. Guess its got to start sometime. lol. Absolutely wonderful G-Ma

    • Ivorwen profile image

      Ivorwen 8 years ago from Hither and Yonder

      Thanks for the good laugh! I enjoyed the second joke tremendously.

    • goldentoad profile image

      goldentoad 8 years ago from Free and running....

      G-Ma you only seem to be getting snappier with the jokes!

    • Feline Prophet profile image

      Feline Prophet 8 years ago from India

      Hehe...so lovely that you can laugh about it all! :)

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      AGVULPES...yes I lose mine all time...coffee that is...:O)

      EOVERY...Thank you my dear..gotta have...HUGS

      TERESA...I so agrre with you and it does take a while to get used to the idea..sobs G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      K@RI...Thanks sweetie and glad you enjoyed it...was fun writing...HUGS

      LAUGHING MOM...I really had to laugh at the video too, in fact watched it several time...also has a beat...HUGS

      MELODY...What a sweet thing to say...Thank you...HUGS

      EARNSTSHUB...Isn't that the truth..and thank you for commenting my dear...HUGS

      TRIPLET MOM....well to the young ones we seem old till they grow up...then it takes time to feel like you are old...Hummm Thanks for commenting my dear...HUGS

      IVORWEN...Thank you hun for commenting and yes I liked the second one too..HUGS

      GT...My sweetie pie...yes I can be snapping in many ways Hee Hee...:O) HUGS

      FELINE...thank you my dear and one day you will too...:O) Hugs

      Sorry folks I was amazed at all the comments and took the easy way out Thanks so much...:O) G-Ma Hugs & Peace

    • gwendymom profile image

      gwendymom 8 years ago from Oklahoma

      G-ma heres one for you.

      Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember

      Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. "Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asks.

      "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

      "Sure."

      "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asks.

      "No, I can remember it."

      "Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so's not to forget it?"

      He says, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

      "I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?" she asks.

      Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!"

      Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment.

      "Where's my toast?"

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Ha Ha good one my dear...:O) laughing hestically..Thanks G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • profile image

      ginn navarre 8 years ago

      G-Ma, you were 100% right on and I totally agree. At 77 now, I am also proof that laughter can get you through rough times.

    • ontheway profile image

      ontheway 8 years ago

      About getting oldG Ma pokes funO

      Very good article, thank you to share, welcome to my space to see

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      ginn...Yes my dear it is so true and really what else can we do now? I have worried enough of my away...Thanks for commenting...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      ontheway...well thank you for stopping in and I see you haven't written a hub yet? but wow have a score of 73???? am waiting to see some of your work my dear...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • funride profile image

      Ricardo Nunes 8 years ago from Portugal

      LOL, this time you really made me roll on the floor :D

      Thank you so much for this great laughs G-Ma. The video was hilarious and the Three Sisters cracked me up. After a working week that almost made me older this was the best read I could have ;)

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      funride...Hi sugar...well sorry for such a working week but am glad the laughs helped...Love the new look here on hubpages ...did you help on this? Have a relaxing week-end ok?  Thanks for commenting...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • Dolores Monet profile image

      Dolores Monet 8 years ago from East Coast, United States

      gma, i think it was bette davis who said ' old age isn't for sissies'

    • Dottie1 profile image

      Dottie1 8 years ago from MA, USA

      Keep poking the fun G-Ma.  You always make us laugh which proves you are young at heart. 

      Old is when...

      a sexy body on t.v. catches your attention and your pacemaker opens the garage door;)

      Have a wonderful day!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Ha Ha ...Glad to see you hear and am   off to read your latest...Have a good week-end sweetie...G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Dolores...Thanks for commenting my dear...and whom ever said it couldn't be more correct...from the body ailments to the heartaches...is much more difficult when you are older...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      pkoson...well nice to meet you and shall go back to read more of your hubs...Thanks for the comment...though I need to look up the word verbosity...you know us oldies lol G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • Silver Freak profile image

      Silver Freak 8 years ago from The state of confusion

      I spent an hour looking for my glasses Friday morning. It wasn't all bad, I got my beside table cleaned off and found my extra set of keys and chased the dust elephants farther under the bed.

      The worst is when I'm sitting in my chair, working and I can't find the tool I was just using. Then I find it stuck behind my ear or sitting on my shoulder - right where I put it so I wouldn't lose it!

      Gettin' old sure isn't for wusses! LOVED the video clip!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Silver Freak...Ha Ha welcome to the club my dear....Isn't life just a bowl full of cherries??? Thanks for commenting...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • lafenty profile image

      lafenty 8 years ago from California

      Great hub. Wonderful jokes. Here are a couple of quotes on aging, thought I'd pass them on.

      "Oh to be seventy again." Oliver Wendall Holmes Jr. at age 92 upon seeing a young woman.

      "To me old age is always fifteen years older than I am. Barnard Baruch age 85.

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      lafenty...those are really good quotes...and thanks for commenting...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace

    • profile image

      jjrubio 8 years ago

      I loved it sooooo very much. It was so funny!! Yes at least you have a wonderful sense of humor on this subject which shows me you are truly young at heart!!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      jjrubio...Am happy that you enjoyed this cause was fun to do and Thank you for saying I am Young at Heart....G-Ma :O) Hugs & peace

    • Jerilee Wei profile image

      Jerilee Wei 8 years ago from United States

      Thanks for the laughs, some days it's hard not to feel old and I'm just 60 and know I've got a long way to go down this road. You and mom (Ginn Navarre) both share that same humorous outlook and I'm glad to be learning about this old age stuff from you both.

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 8 years ago from australia

      G-ma I don't even wonder about your age.I think you are the biggest spunk on two legs and I love ya.x0x000000000000xx

    • guidebaba profile image

      guidebaba 8 years ago from India

      Who is that IDEOT saying you are old. You seem to be younger then me from HEAD and HEART. This is what matters to me and most people on earth with least brain. Love !!!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      JERILEE...well sweetie it goes by faster then we think...but is fine just keep a smile on your pretty face...G-Ma :O) Hugs

      BLONDEPOET...You are so very sweet Thank you and I love you too HAPPY EASTER...G-Ma HUGS

      GUIDEBABA...I have no idea but I am certainly getting there am 69 now...Yikes I said that out loud...ssshhhhh...Thanks for commenting...G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • Froggy213 profile image

      Greg Boudonck 8 years ago from On A Mountain In Puerto Rico

      You know G-Ma, I have always thought of you as my 19 year old girlfriend--Your not old are you??? :)))))

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Aren't you sweet...and Thanks..My mind and heart are young, but the body has slowed down a bit...do I admit my age here? G-Ma :O) Hugs

    • IslandVoice profile image

      Sylvia Van Velzer 8 years ago from Hawaii

      You are so lovely! I can see why you are loved and esteemed by everyone!

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      IslandVoive...Nice to meet you my dear and thank you for such a lovely comment..am off to read about you...G-Ma :O) Hugs

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