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Ali The Bachelorette: After The Final Rose

Updated on September 13, 2013

Happily Ever After....?

Ali Fedotowsky and Roberto Martinez on The Bachelorette
Ali Fedotowsky and Roberto Martinez on The Bachelorette | Source

The “After the Final Rose” episode can be crazy dramatic (like Jason dumping Melissa for future-wife, Molly) or completely snoozalicious. I’d say Ali and Roberto giggling over each other would definitely fall into the latter category. It had potential to have had a lot more spice if Chris L was not so mature or if Frank had the cojones to show his face.

I Would Have Put A Photo Of Frank Here, But He Didn't Show Up On Picture Day

Frank Hides

It was pretty pointless to even discuss Frank since he opted not to attend.  He apparently was all set to show up, but backed out at the last minute.  He probably couldn’t decide if he wanted to take a plane, car, or bus to get there.  We’re all familiar with his track record with important decisions.

It was awkward watching the Ali/Frank love montage because they seemed to have a great relationship before he lost his mind and skipped town for some random brunette.  Ali had to put on her best poker face while she reviewed the way they were.    

Chris Harrison was armed with dumb questions, like if Ali thinks Frank still has feelings for Nicole. How the funk is she supposed to know that?  He also asked if things would have been different if Frank had not self-eliminated.  Ali couldn’t answer that—it’s not fair to Chris L because that means he was only kept around by default.  Who knows, maybe that would have been the day that she got tired of Frank’s insecurities and would have sent him home.   

In the end, Ali forgave Frank and is happy that they each found love.  Weak sauce.

Isn't He Sweet?

Chris Lambert
Chris Lambert | Source

Chris L—Best Ex Ever

We were all treated to a replay of the Chris and Ali’s breakup, which we just watched an hour before.  At least she broke up with him before he got down on one knee and asked her to marry him.  That was Jason’s complaint when DeAnna rejected him for Jesse.  Yes, I know that my mind stores the dumbest information.

Leave it to Chris Harrison to ask the awful “what if” questions like if Chris L thinks Ali would have changed her mind had they gone on a final date.  Chris L took the high road during the entire interview and gave Ali credit for letting him go before he fell more in love with her.  Also, he was very sincere in congratulating Ali on her engagement.  He seems like such a great boyfriend and ex-boyfriend--I’d date him and break up with him.

Chris is now ready to find the right girl…does that mean he might be the next Bachelor?   Can they please call it Rainbow of Love?

All joking aside, the rainbow incident in Tahiti was appreciated by Ali and the entire cast and crew.  Everybody was crying and laughing.  A sincere moment on a reality show—whoda thunk? 

Love At First Sight

Ali revealed that she was suspicious of Roberto in the beginning because she assumed that someone that good-looking had to be a player.  That’s an unfair stereotype of gorgeous people.  I’m personally offended!

Chris Harrison, in his great wisdom, believed that Ali and Roberto were meant to be together from the second he came out of the limo.  Then why didn’t he tell her and save everybody the heartache?  Ali said she now believes in love-at-first-sight.  Can you really re-write history like that?  If she was in love with him the first night, then why didn’t she keep him and send everyone else home?  For all those little girls out there looking for a fairy tale, if you experience love at first sight with the man of your dreams, be sure to date 24 other men in the following 6 weeks just to be sure. 

Roberto was asked what it was like climbing all those stairs to get to Ali for the proposal.  Gee, the buckets of sweat pouring off of him made it seem like a casual stroll in the park.  They were the Tahitian heat, he was in a full suit, he’s a big-time sweater naturally so his face was melting off, and he was about to propose to a virtual stranger on national TV—and you want to know what the stairs were like? 

Re-watching the proposal, it was very soap opera-esque.  I’m afraid one or both members of this couple are going to audition for a role on daytime television.  Meanwhile, you could trace the tracks of Ali’s tears as it eroded her makeup while she was watching the proposal.  That’s never a good look.

For the past three months Ali and Roberto have been hiding from the media and acting like total nerds.  I’m glad they did not demonstrate one of their secret handshakes, and I doubt that watching movies was all they were doing with their phone time.

The Happy Couple

Ali The Bachelorette
Ali The Bachelorette | Source

Better Stay Together-OR ELSE!

After making her <alleged> $100,000 from The Bachelorette, it’s time for Ali to pull her weight and get a job.  Ali and Roberto are moving into an apartment together in San Diego.  That’s just close enough to LA for her to go to auditions during the day, while he sells insurance to some So Cal suckers.  How romantic.

ABC sent the couple off in typical Bachelorette style, via helicopter to Catalina Island.  I think they were thanking Ali for choosing someone, and giving them a chance to make another season.  If the success rate of this show doesn’t improve, ABC might have to can the series.  This couple needs to make it through thick and thin--no pressure, Ali & Roberto! 


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      Josiane 3 years ago

      Suzanne- I have never heard that the bride-to-be has to wear white at the rehearsal dniner! You will be wearing white the entire next day so I vote for something with a little more color, heck even a print!! You should definitely expand your search, good luck!