Ben Affleck And Jennifer Garner Are Getting A Divorce
The News Is True
I don't want to keep you on a limb here so I will start by telling you that the news is very much true my friends, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are getting a divorce. They've announced this just the other days and stunned everybody while doing so.
I am not usually the one to talk about these kinds of subjects as I tend to consider them more appropriate for blog posts rather than articles for established websites like HubPages. But hearing this news made me a little sad, and I am not the one to cry for celebrities.
The thing is that I liked them, their family, their way of carrying for their privacy and their children's privacy. They were like a good role model in a world where all you can see are televised fights, cheating and breakups. There are just a few Hollywood families that truly act like a family and stay married years after taking the step. Families that you don't hear rumors like any one of them cheating or acting inappropriate in public. The Beckham and Tom Hanks families come to mind that are just like Affleck-Garner.
I do have to admit that when they first hooked up, Ben Affleck just ended things with Jennifer Lopez so I thought: "he went and found himself a new Jennifer". I didn't pay much attention after that thinking that it will all end soon anyway. When time passed, they got married, started a family and I saw how much respect they had for one another, their family and the public I've started liking them and noticing them.
Common People vs. Hollywood Celebrities
So, I am asking myself, if all we can see around us is scandal, fights, exaggerated reality shows, divorce ... how can the common people be any different? Hollywood starts give people the illusion that their life is similar to ours and that everybody should aim for the stars and not settle.
But what is so wrong about settling? Why do we need to search for perfection? Don't get me wrong, if the person next to you is truly wrong, if your life is a nightmare then you should separate or get a divorce, but if your loved one's mistake is of leaving the toilet seat up, forgetting what type of juice you like or always renting the wrong movie, that's not reason to break a marriage.
You shouldn't settle if you are unhappy and you feel like you don't belong there and that your life could and should be much better. But if you are looking for perfection I am sorry to disappoint you, but you are not going to find it anywhere. Nobody is perfect, not even ourselves, so how can we ask the person beside us to be what we cannot be?
Maybe they would love for someone who would give them a foot rub when they come home from work or a warm meal served in bed in the morning, but they settle with what they have: a life partner who hates to give massages or always expects us to make breakfast.
Accept One Another
We disappoint each other daily, but not because we want to do that. Nobody wakes up in the morning thinking of new ways to annoy the other person. We usually get disappointed because the person next to us isn't as we created them in our mind. When we create unrealistic expectations we are bound to end up getting hurt and fell disappointed when they don't come true. But it is not the fault of our loved ones, they've always been that way, we just made an idea in our mind that at some point they will change and do things differently.
I've asked my boyfriend at some point why he was doing a certain thing that annoyed me so much and he said: "I didn't know this was annoying for you, you never complained". That was because I never told him, I would just make faces at him, sometimes laughed thinking that at some point he will realize I don't like that. But how could he have known something that was in my mind and I've never verbalized?
The Affleck Family Went To Therapy For Two Years
The news was also talking about how they really wished to solve things between them and went to therapy for two whole years before putting an end to their marriage. Again, in my eyes this talks about what kind of people they are and they have my respect. Anyone who tried for that long to find a solution shows me that they care, and if they couldn't find that solution after all this time tells me that they made the right decision.
At least they tried, which is way less I can say about a lot of people I know. I know people who broke up after a disagreement which turned into a fight. He left to cool himself out on a walk, she interpreted it like a break up, moved back to her parents and they've split. For something that started as a disagreement. Is it just me or is this really nuts? Because this is exactly how it feels to me.
I am sorry for Ben and Jennifer for going through this, and I am sorry for those children who won't make sense of anything and they are about to face the whole world with questions about their parents divorce making it 1 000 times worse than it would be if a common family would end their life together.
I hope they will find a way to pass through this and make it so that their children don't feel like their whole world is ending.