Daily Weird # 36 Plumber puts 17 toilets on his lawn....it's down the crapper from there.
Help, I've fallen and I can't get up!!
Look.. It's Cookie Monster Pooping on the Lawn!
The local lawmakers decided to tear down an elementary school (since no one was learning anything anyway ) and build a larger middle school. They believed, rightfully so, that this would up the quality of food fights. Children with good potato slinging skills from all over the state were brought in and the middle school immediately began to generate more traffic.
Everyone was happy, everyone that is, except Joe the Plumber. Ok, it wasn’t Joe, (love you Joe!) but I like to think this guy is just as awesome. Joe, or David Linscott as you may want to call him, has property on a corner lot near the newly expanded school.
Due to the larger middle school, traffic on his street also expanded, rose, was added too… increased. I would have had the correct word the first time if only my school had been added to or made largerer-est. Bigger schools make smarter students.
Mr. Linscott decided he was not happy losing his privacy to a bunch of school kids who weren’t getting smarter. He went to middle school, and he knew he didn't get any smarter. Linscott decided he was not going to take this sitting down. He went into his arse nal and fought back the only way he knew how. With toilets. Lots and lots of toilets. 17 to be exact. He put 17 (that’s 10+7 if you’re counting- my education wasn’t a total waste), toilets on his lawn to protest his lack of privacy.
He then proceeded to get a newspaper and use the bathroom seventeen times each morning, causing the community to lose their breakfast. Ok, he didn’t do that, but he should have. Had he done that, he not only would have demonstrated his complete lack of privacy, but he also would have proven himself to be as cool as Joe the Plumber.
He didn’t, and he isn’t. What he did instead was place the toilets along the perimeter of his lawn. That was brilliant. We all know that if you want to keep middle school kids off of your lawn, all you have to do is put a toilet or seventeen 17. That’s not an attraction at all . He’s also placed random stuffed animals in some of the crappers. I’m at a loss to know if this was to keep the kids from using the potties on the way to school (occupied !) or to give them just one more thing to play with as they wandered into his potty fun land?
“Look it’s Cookie Monster pooping on the lawn! Bad Cookie Monster!”
“Here, I found Buzz Lightyear. He’s fast on the crapper, and still has time to defeat the Cookie Monster! Go Buzz Lightyear!”
I want to play!!!
I would like to personally thank Mr. Linscott for making the walk to school fun, creative and entertaining for all the children.
Mr. Linscott, is waiting for the town to come up with the money for a privacy fence for his lawn. He's given them lots of incentive to hurry.
For more on the plumber who placed crappers in protest, click a link below.
- Maine man uses toilets to pooh-pooh town decision : News : UpperMichigansSource.com
Maine man uses toilet display to pooh-pooh town's decision to close school
- Plumber Makes Big Stink Over Town Decision - Portland News Story - WMTW Portland
KITTERY, Maine -- A Maine plumber is using a toilet display on his lawn to pooh-pooh a town decision that he feels led to more parking on the Kittery street where he lives. Friday, March 25, 2011.
- Maine man puts toilets on lawn to protest town decision | wlbz2.com