Donald Trump Cites Great Wall of China as Example for Immigration Policy
After strongly advocating for a wall along the Mexican and -- later -- Canadian borders, Republican frontrunner and Presidential hopeful, Donald Trump, finally unveiled some technical details of his controversial plan.
Speaking at a rally in Chicago in front of over 3,000 people, he openly said, "I never thought I'd credit China for anything," Trump remarked, "but their wall was pretty damn effective. Nobody ever successfully invaded their country, you know, because of the wall".
When pressed for further comment, Trump stated that by analyzing the construction of the Great Wall of China, he concluded that it would be cheaper to build a stone wall as opposed to conventional steel and concrete.
"Hell, a wall's a wall," he said. "I don't care if it's made of concrete or stone, as long as it keeps Mexicans from taking our jobs. It's about security. Besides, Mexico will appreciate us saving them money when they finally pony up the cash for this thing. It's the least we could do".
"HELL, A WALL'S A WALL"
Support was almost unanimous among Trump voters. Bertha White, a mother of four and strong gun rights advocate said "I think Donnie's on the right track with this. It's faster. It saves us money. It keeps out Mexicans, and best of all, it's simple. I like simple."
Other fans were equally enthusiastic, even offering suggestions about how they could upgrade the wall. One 81 year old NRA member suggested that the wall design could accommodate more than enough snipers and "maybe some artillery".
Encouraged by the usual enthusiasm from his supporters, Trump could not resist the opportunity to slide a joke into his otherwise serious speech. "I'd use my penis as the wall, but it's too damn long, plus I don't want to just stand there and block immigrants. I'll need to walk around and keep it in my pants".
"I LIKE SIMPLE"
Some experts, however, are skeptical. One journalist was quick to point out that they would need detailed schematics of The Great Wall before the project begins. "Foreign relations between China and the U.S. are complicated at best," said CNN foreign correspondent, Wendy Northcutt. "Considering Mr. Trump's general lack of popularity, we will be hard-pressed to have them co-operate with a Republican presidency under Trump."
The presidential hopeful, however, was not deterred. "I'll just look it up on Wikipedia," he said.