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Funny Answers to TVs Family Fortunes (Family Feuds) Questions

Updated on March 21, 2016

Just for fun

Hello all.

I hope you've been enjoying my hubs so far. If you haven't seen any of them yet then you can catch up with them here. The Quiz Masters Profile

A little while back I did a Family Fortunes quiz for you to take part in and I thought it would be nice to follow up with some funny answers that people on the TV show gave to some of the questions. Some of you may have seen these before but even if you have they are still a good laugh.

The 1st presenter of Family Fortunes in the UK
The 1st presenter of Family Fortunes in the UK | Source

These funny answers will have you crying with laughter..

I run a pub quiz every week and one of the fun rounds I do is Family Fortunes. It makes a nice change to do something different than just asking general knowledge questions. Before I start the Family Fortunes round I read out a couple of funny answers that contestants actually said on the show while trying to win the jackpot game.

For any of you who are unfamiliar with Family Fortunes, in the U.S it's called Family Feuds or maybe you come from a country that has never shown it on TV, here is how the game show works.

All the questions start "We asked 100 people...", now the idea of the game is for the contestants to try and guess one of the top 5 answers that 100 people surveyed said to that particular question. Obviously the top answer is worth the most points and the score is based on how many people, from that 100 surveyed, said that answer. For example "We asked 100 people to name any Italian city." the top 5 answers are,

Rome 57 points (57 people surveyed said this answer)
Milan 22 points
Naples 11 points
Florence 7 points
Venice 3 points

All the questions in the show are very simple like this and you would expect most people to always get at least one of the top 5 answers. But, in the jackpot round one contestant only has 30 seconds to answer 5 such questions, that's only 6 seconds per question! This is how we get some funny answers because they literally have to say the first thing that comes into their head.

Here are my favourite funny answers from the show....

"We asked 100 people to name..."

An animal that eats pollen: "The honey fly.."

An animal you cannot fit into a Mini car: "Mouse.."

A food that has one or more holes in it: "Spaghetti.."

Something made of wool: "Cotton wool.."

An animal with three letters: "Lion.."

A bad place to fall asleep: "Concrete.."

A French ferry port: "Dover.."

Something you mount: "A mountain.."

Something you lose when you get older: "Your purse.."

A sport which involves throwing something: "Tennis.."

A type of bean: "Lesbian.."

Something you would play with in the bath: "A bazooka.."

Someone you wouldn't swear in front of: "Yourself.."

A country where Arabic is spoken: "Nigeria.."

Someone or something whose existence has never been proven: "Hitler.."

Something that makes you close your eyes: "Dark.."

Something that comes in pairs: "Rabbits.."

A way of toasting someone: "Over a fire.."

A Boy's name beginning with the letter J: "Gerald.."

An instrument you can play while walking in the street: "A cello.."

A type of oil: "Sewing-machine oil.."

A word beginning with Z: "Xylophone.."

A slang word for a girl: "Slag.."

An animal with horns: "A bee..."

A medieval weapon: "Hand-grenade.."

Something made of wool: "A sheep.."

Something a bridegroom might wear: "A dress.."

Someone you wouldn't expect to see in a strip club: "Animals.."

An animal with a long tail: "A rabbit.."

Something a train-spotter would have in his pocket: "A magnifying glass.."

Something you put out for the birds: "Worms.."

A way to prevent snoring: "Put a pillow over his face.."

A word used to describe a very hot day: "A very hot day.."

A song from 'The Sound Of Music': "Dancing Queen.."

Someone who works early hours: "A burglar.."

Something made to be wheeled around: "A hammer.."

A reason for kneeling: "To be beheaded.."

A nickname for a slim person: "Slimmy.."

A measurement of liquid: "Paint.."

Something that's nice to wear next to your skin: "Pants.."

A famous Dick: "Carrot.."

A wild animal that's native to Britain: "A bear.."

Something that Father Christmas does when he comes to your house: "Feeds your pets.."

Something that comes in 7's: "Fingers.."

A vocalist known by only one name: "Michael Jackson.."

A yellow fruit: "Orange.."

A popular TV soap: "Dove.."

Other than 'carrier', a type of bag: "Horse.."

Something you might find in a garage: "a grand piano.."

Something a Frenchman would say: "En Garde!"

The first time I read these I thought I was going to pass out with laughter. I couldn't see the screen because I had tears in my eyes. I printed them off and showed them to my girlfriend in a cafe one afternoon, she had the same reaction and we got some very strange looks from the other diners which was quite embarrassing.

If you would like to take part in a Family Fortunes quiz and see how well you would score then I made one here on the hub pages. Click here to take part: Family Fortunes Quiz

I am going to be writing many more fun articles so if you want to be notified when I post my next one then why not Follow Me or if you are not a member of HubPages then you can subscribe to my rss feed

Until next time, I hope you have a great day :)



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    • The Quiz Master profile image

      Warren 6 years ago from England

      Glad I made you laugh jayjay.

      Come on everyone, why are you not voting up this hub? Is it not funny?

    • jayjay40 profile image

      jayjay40 6 years ago from Bristol England

      Loved reading this hub, couldn't stop laughing. Thanks for sharing