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Dear Generation X Star Wars Fans, You Don't Count Anymore.
Dear Generation X Star Wars fans you don’t count anymore. Your ideas of what the story was about are wrong. Your favorite characters that you were introduced to in A New Hope and everything that is good and noble that you thought the franchise was about is being ripped asunder. Why? To cater to a Global audience, diversity and idiot Millennials who think nothing occurred in the world before they woke up this morning.
If you have any anti-establishment tendencies and I certainly do and you raise the red flag let’s say about how ridiculously stupid The Force Awakens was or you state that you have a hope that somehow something that validates what the first trilogy meant to you, you can plan on being attacked, bullied, threatened and called every name in the book. And do not hope that Rey is somehow that butcher Ren’s sister. Why? That can’t be true IT’S IMPOSSIBLE! I do not understand why it would be impossible but man if you bring that idea up you get so much hate thrown at you that you feel sympathy for President the Donald. I know it’s because people are wedded to the idea that the new Disney canon, aka sissified Star Wars for Beta Males and their female masters is dogma. Despite the fact I am sure these zombies do not know what the word dogma means. Think of their view of the new canon’s dogma as kind of like what dogma is to the Catholic Church or the Suras to radical Islam. This new canon dogma cannot ever be deviated from no matter the fact that the new canon makes no sense at all. The new canon is also uninteresting, uninspired and insipid shit. But I dare you to tell a Star Wars fan boy that. They will chase you all over with their cheap Chinese made plastic light sabers.
John Lydon aka Johnny Rotten once said “If you are pissing people off you know you are doing something right.” I guess that speaking truth to power when it comes to something you hold near and dear as a touchstone really upsets the fanatics. That’s fine, they need to have their toes stepped on and their weird little worlds invaded by truth.
I have a theory about these people: Disney and Lucas film could film a steaming crap pile for two hours, stamp Star Wars on it and these fanatics would flock to watch and become awestruck by the steam rising from the brown turds. Then they’d leave, rush to their YouTube channels or blogs and pronounce this film to be the most epic thing they have ever seen and call it brilliant and better than Empire. If you point out then that they just watched a steaming poop pile for two hours they will attack you and tell you that you are old and wrong, and should shut up. These fans outrage is hilarious because the people who dissent over the new trilogy are not old, nor are they wrong and they will not shut up. Again Johnny Rotten’s quote about pissing people off is true. Being comfortable with a lie for these fanatics is their way of coping because they know that the older and wiser truth teller is right. They don’t want those nasty facts to get in their way because dammit, it’s Star Wars. Shut up and like it, or else.
By the way, saying hey that’s a steaming pile of shit does not make you less of a Star Wars fan. Why? Because it shows that you are a better fan because you care enough about the franchise to say, “can’t you twerps do better than this?” They could if they were talented but that would mean the writers like Pablo Hidalgo and the rest would have to actually go back to college and learn how to fashion a coherent story that makes sense and keeps characters continuity. I am not sure the new writers such as Hidalgo etc ever read Joseph Campbell’s The Hero With a Thousand Faces because what they have produced and what they are producing is post-modern whiny kid crap that has no connection at all to the first trilogy. You cannot bring the three heroes from the first trilogy forward into a story that bears little or no resemblance to the original trilogy. I know Rian Johnson said trust me, my question is why? After the crap fest that was The Force Awakens every one of us should be demanding something be done to salvage the new trilogy before it either becomes Pirates of the Caribbean 75, or something that resembles the last Michael Bay horror fest. Do it right, or not at all. The rule should have been measure twice and cut once. So again why should we trust Johnson or Hidalgo with the next installment when The Force Awakens was the place where everything that the original trilogy ended with was ground into the gravel of Epcot Center.
But hey why respect the original fans and their perceptions of Star Wars when it’s more fun to see favorite characters butchered by their own sons. Oh and just wait gang: That son will turn back to the light side because dammit he’s really a good guy. DESPITE MURDERING HIS FATHER WHO HAPPENED TO BE ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC CHARACTERS IN THE TRILOGY! And if you call that idea bullshit, because let’s face it, it is in fact bullshit, the fan boys and fan girls will come at you waving their cheap plastic Chinese made light sabers. I am sorry but what that brat did was unforgiveable and there should be a satisfying justice but wait how can there be justice when nihilism is creeping in. All Abrams and company did was render Han Solo’s heroism and sacrifice to meaninglessness and the relationship with the Princess meaningless as well. Really Solo should have kissed the Princess goodbye at the end of ROTJ and took off in the Falcon if this truly disturbing end was it for him. Good job, Disney, you soulless corporate dragon.
Oh and FYI: There is a contingent of fan girls that have a creepy thing for Ren. They remind me of Manson’s followers or the girls who swooned over the Boston Marathon Bomber, Dzhokhar Tsarneav. It is freaking bizarre. And do not dare defend Han Solo to them, they will beat you down with their Chinese made Ren light sabers. In essence, Disney and JJ Abrams have turned Star Wars into a bizarre space version of Twilight and Rey into Bella Swan and Ren into Edward Cullen. That’s not romance, its creepy weird crap.
Look, I love the original characters. Not a huge fan of Luke Skywalker but he’s the main character so at least keep him true to where his character ended up at the end of ROTJ. I cannot buy what they did to him, or Han Solo or Leia. Don’t get precious with me either because I was there when the first films came out. These films were part of the cultural tapestry of the times and something we longed for because there was nothing like watching the Empire get beaten down and cheering wildly. Anyone cheer wildly at the end of TFAW? I heard crickets, my own sobs and women behind me saying, why did they do that? Do you all honestly expect to cheer at the end of the Last Jedi? Trust me you won’t be cheering at the end of The Last Jedi. It will be dark, likely disturbing and nihilistic.
To me and many others, Star Wars isn’t just a space opera it was part of our formation as kids. It was something we aspired to. It made the late 70’s and early 80’s the most amazing time to grow up. It was dazzling, and it was uncompromisingly beautiful. No one had seen anything like it before and the characters touched the audience in ways I am not sure any of the actors ever realized. George Lucas gave our generation our own Lord of the Rings, our own Narnia. Yet here we are now feeling bitter, upset, betrayed and not a little pissed off that none of these writers and that lousy director could come up with something more edifying than the Force Awakens. And we collectively cringe when we see anything about the Last Jedi. I mean there are more fans than just the above Chinese communists, and narcissistic, indifferent Millennials with daddy and mommy issues.
Star Wars was in many ways anti-establishment. The original trilogy was about taking on what was the established order and changing it forever. It was about black and white lines and right versus wrong. It was about change for the good, and never going back. It was about discovering the courage to do the right thing in all of us. And it was really f*cking cool.
Now that Disney owns it and they are turning into a vanilla, colorless piece of soulless establishment crap. When I watched some of the making of films on The Force Awakens I saw people just going through the motions. JJ Abrams is such a robotic phony he could play C3P0 and no one would have ever noticed the difference. I am serious. The lack of joy in making the film was apparent. Everybody seemed forced and the joy of the old cast being together was lackluster. They knew they were making shit that resembled nothing of the old trilogy. Hamill himself said he wasn’t happy with his characters direction. It is like this: After everything Luke, Han and Leia had gone through we are supposed to buy that Han and Luke run away when the going gets tough? Really? Basically what Abrams and company were selling us is the journeys that Luke and Han went on in the first trilogy were pointless. That everything they had learned, and how they changed and grew was insincere because that’s how people behave and character never changes no matter what trials the character has gone through. Bullfingshit. Take it from me if you go through traumatic, profound life altering events like those two characters had to deal with you never go back to who you were before. That person you were no longer exists. That is how one becomes an adult. But here we are, Han goes back to being a smuggler and Luke? He’s wandering around the galaxy like Kwai Chang Cane looking for the first Jedi temple and when he’s not on his search he’s making vroom vroom noises with his model ships. And despite the glowing endorsements from people who say they are in the know don’t expect the Last Jedi to be any better.
When you watch the making of documentary’s about the original first movie, none of the cast or crew knew where it would take them. They were on the edge of film making, on this unique journey that became a force of its own that carried them to a place they did not expect to find themselves, and that place was where legends reside. The enthusiasm was boundless because established film making rules were being broken and barriers were being crashed through.
The Force Awakens isn’t any more ground breaking than Barb Wire or Rambo 55. If you deconstruct it you will discover what can only be described as a pretty vacant poorly conceived, badly acted movie that aims for mediocrity. Do Millennials notice this? These are people who don’t know who Annie Lennox is and think Sir Paul McCartney was just some lucky old guy who got to sing with Kanye West. Keep in mind these smart college educated kids think Kanye is a great rock star. But I digress.
This is a terrible continuation of our beloved franchise. I had a Hollywood writer friend tell me they aren’t making them for us. He’s right. We don’t count. We only helped turn the franchise into a four billion dollar juggernaut. Yet here we are watching everything we believed about Star Wars being crushed like a plastic soda bottle beneath the heel of Disney and spurious establishment Hollywood posers.
In the end, I feel bad for the Millennial’s. They will never know the happiness we kids of the late 70’s and early 80’s felt when we discovered Star Wars. They will never discover how cool Han Solo was and is, or how tough Princess Leia was and is, and they will never be able to witness Luke Skywalker’s evolution from farm boy to Jedi. But hey like a friend of mine said, Star Wars must move on so up yours and your ideas and what this meant to you. It doesn’t matter. You don’t matter. The writers of these films and craptastic books and comics are right and you have zero right to criticize them. You are stuck in the past. Well, that could be true and yet it’s not. We just wanted our heroes honored and our memories respected. That’s all. But hey we are just a forgotten generation. Who cares about us, right, Disney? Right, Kathleen Kennedy? Right, JJ Abrams?