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Grey's Fifty Shades

Updated on February 24, 2015
The official movie poster
The official movie poster | Source

I'm back! And this time, it's about an international blockbuster sensation. E.L. James' Fifty Shades of Grey.

Now, before I start, I'd just like to say that three days before the movie premiered here in Cebu, I had visited a friend's house and saw the book laying on her table. And since the book came out 4 years ago, it had gained international acclaim and therefore, I asked if I could read it. I'm not into romance novels as I'm more into science, sci-fi, history, technology or military genres. But I decided to swallow the bullet for once and actually read it. In fact, I will tell you that I read only the first page of the first chapter and immediately decided that it just wasn't for me and never will be. Now at this time, since the book was in my hands, I remembered another friend of mine had told me a long while back that if it is boring, go to Plan B.

Plan B was rather simple, actually: Skip everything and go to the center of the book where the protagonists, Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey, make love. And, by golly, it was astonishing! For the first time in my life, I had completely forgotten about science, sci-fi, history, technology and military genres and their associated hardware. I had even forgotten about the next Formula One race (Yes, I abhor the 1.6L Turbo-charged V-6 engines that sound like an asthmatic breathing through a straw but I still am an avid fan). I had forgotten my beliefs, values and ideologies and indulged myself in the sensual savagery that was unfolding before my very eyes. I'd never known such passion and desire and lust. Well, naturally, because I'd never read a romance-genre novel before. It was so intense that I decided to close the book. It was just absolutely too much for me.

Gee, thanks!

Yes! I'm hired!
Yes! I'm hired! | Source

As I had mentioned in one of my earlier blogs, Shive's Valentine's Day Special, I had a date whilst watching the movie and she was superb! And I also gave you, dear readers, some small bit of spoilers. But since it's been two weeks since that date with her, I'm sure most of you have most certainly seen it by now.

Do you remember the scene where Ana slipped and Chris helped her back up? Goodness me, the cinema went wild! And even more so when Ana mentioned something about looking at her during the interview and Chris' reply? "I am". I think I remember a small earthquake while I was in my seat as well as wishing I had military-grade ear muffs, because, chips ahoy, some ladies were bouncing in sheer and utter kiligness.

Another earthquake was felt when Chris visited Ana in her shop. This time, I so nearly jumped out of my seat and was ready to yell: "Down! All hands down! Get down!" Thankfully, I had noticed my date, Gelve, smiling in kiligness and remembered that I'm in a cinema house, not in World War 3. And I made it a point that I'd relax a bit, nervous and silly me. Thankfully, an earthquake wasn't felt again until the helicopter scene, but this time, I was ready for it.

Now, about this time, I should like to say up front that the sweetest part of the movie, I felt, was the helicopter date. Oh, and the glider scene? Pah! That one doesn't even come close. I mean, there was a symphony of angels when the helicopter was seen for the first time and I shall never forget my date's face as well as all the ladies in the cinema house exclaiming: "WOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!" The glider scene didn't have the excitement or pizzazz that the helicopter scene did.

The song from the helicopter date

Remember the elevator scene where they kiss each other for the first time? Well, now, naughty, naughty! And right away, you can see Chris' dominant attitude by pushing Ana's arms upwards. Why am I getting into the minute details? However, it was short lived as, rather embarrassingly, they were interrupted. Chris definitely maintained composure while Ana was what looked like disbelief and shock and nervousness. Yes, there was another earthquake, but barely noticeable.

Back to Charlie Tango, I too was quite impressed. If you love someone, you'd do your best to give the best, right? And he did exactly that. His private helicopter was turned into a date ride and he claims that it was his first time doing so. The date was short lived, however, because it turns out, Seattle is a quick 5-minute fly from...... Oh, I don't know, where ever it is they came from. And upon touch down, the Presidential Suite was revealed. God above, what luxury! What immense size! It looked like you could fit the entire Ferrari Factory in Maranello, Italy and still have space for parking! I'd seen pictures of Presidential Suites in 5-star hotels and beach resorts here in Cebu, but none came close to the one Chris had. It had two floors and I swear, NASA could make a brand new Mission Control in that room.

And about this time, Ana was introduced to the Play Room (Xbox, anyone?). Now you might think, like I did, as Ana was thinking. Big room full of the latest technological kit that could be a gamer's paradise. But, talk of the Devil, it wasn't. It was a room where Chris dominated like an absolute monarch. There was even a blithering contract to allow him to dominate the poor lady who consented. And after much deliberation and pensivity, Ana agreed if some forms of submission were removed. Ana was later told by Chris himself that he was his Aunt's submissive for.... 6 years, was it?

A superb book

Book cover art
Book cover art | Source
Movie
Year released
Budget
Box Office
Fifty Shades of Grey
2015
$ 40 Million
$ 409.7 Million
Fifty Shades Darker
2017-2018
???
N/A
Fifty Shades Freed
???
???
N/A

Finally!

Right before they were interrupted
Right before they were interrupted | Source

Finally, after feeling left out by Chris, she asked what was the matter? She was always kept in the dark about everything and even felt hurt because the pommy B****** just wouldn't tell her anything or cuddle after a night of hot sex or sleep in the same bed with her. She even reasoned something about; how could you love me if I'm always alone or left in the dark? Which is true. If you love someone, why leave them in the bloody dark? Why negate them the love they deserve?

That same night, Ana got a taste of the dark side of submission. Being made to count from 1-6, she took all lashes from Chris that seemed misogynistic and wouldn't want anything to do with him and; "don't you dare touch me"

Because helicopter

Arguably the best dating scene
Arguably the best dating scene | Source

And now, finally after even more deliberation and pensivity as well as crying as much tears as can be filled in an Olymic-sized swimming pool.......

"Anastasia"

"Christian"

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