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Barney Stinson Funny Quotes

Updated on December 16, 2015
Barney Stinson meme, Is it funny?
Barney Stinson meme, Is it funny?

Barney Stinson Funny Quotes

How I Met Your Mother character Barney Stinson quotes on suits and of being awesome can be seen on Tumblr, Twitter, Meme sites and Facebook, but the following Barney Stinson quotes are extremely funny and totally fresh.

Barney Stinson Crazy Quotes:

  1. There is no doubt that Barney Stinson has been the greatest TV show character ever. Barney Stinson fans love his performance and funny quotes about love and suits on the TV show How I Met Your Mother. Few of these funny quotes are said by Barney Stinson and most of the quotes are about Barney Stinson funny moments.
  2. A high five don't cut it how bout a high.
  3. Once in high school, I had a U.S. history quiz on a video I'd missed the previous day. One of the questions was, according to the video, what were the five key lessons learned in the Korean War? To which I wrote "never get involved in a land war in Asia" 5 times. I got full credit.
  4. Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber are rocking the modern MC Hammer pants!
  5. I don't work for peanuts people, so stop wasting my time.
  6. Before I die I will be fluent in 4 languages, play 3 instruments, and perfect as many dance styles that I can.
  7. When it comes to success the only limit - there is no limit.
  8. When I want a suit, I want to look all sophisticated.
  9. I have finally joined the ranks of suit-owning men. I'm that much closer to being Ronald Reagan, Johnny Depp, and most importantly, Justin Timberlake.
  10. Don't people understand I suffer from a terrible case of FOMO? Fear of missing out!
  11. I like wearing a suit around. People look at you and treat you with a higher standard.
  12. Tattoos are a luxury item, not a necessity. They cost a lot because we have to put a lot into them, both time and energy.
  13. Dear Barney Stinson, I want your apartment wardrobe. That is all.
  14. Liking your own status is like telling a joke then saying my jokes are so funny.
  15. What if Barney Stinson is actually Dr. Horrible? He moved to New York City, and from there began a scheme to destroy the populace. He acts like a player and sleep with a large number of women. Then when they're asleep he injects them with one of a number of super-viruses that stay latent for a certain amount of time, before they go active and start to decimate the population in various ways.
  16. My shirts are starting to make me look like I shop at baby gap... Frustrating!
  17. Step one to running a marathon: You run. There is no step two.
  18. The main problem with repeats of old movies on TV is that people like Ashton Kutcher get to be on TV. I'm sure people would rather see me and Barney Stinson fight Godzilla with light sabers.
  19. When you're legendary, everything you say is quotable.
  20. Don't stab the dragon. Because the dragon will stab you back.
  21. Is it sad that the old rag-tag angel and devil on my shoulders have been replaced with Ted Mosby and Barney Stinson?
  22. Barney Stinson is in starship troopers. Legendary indeed!
  23. The first step - Lose the mustache, doesn’t match your suit. Second step - Get a suit.
  24. My dog watches T.V intently but every time I go to take a picture of her doing it she notices and poses for the camera.
  25. Girlfriends are like the flu, out of your system after a few weeks in bed.
  26. The BRO CODE rule number 6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. This is by Barney Stinson on the series How I met your Mother and apparently Obama never reads THE BRO CODE. It's written in stone.
  27. I have to admit. What makes Barney Stinson so much more attractive is that he is in a suit all the time.
  28. I don't understand why it's so attractive, but there's something about a man who suits up, well-dressed guys are so much more attractive than a guy with his jeans around his back.
  29. If Barney Stinson is talking to a woman who just got married, I wonder what she'll do.
  30. It's honestly really hard letting a rented tuxedo hang around when I know I could be finding any excuse on the planet right now to wear it.
  31. When they tell you, you can't do it, tell them Challenge Accepted.
  32. I don't know about you, but I'd rather wear a Suit & Tie when I'm chilling' and board shorts and a tank when I am working.
  33. Yesterday I was told that I look like the little muscular brother of Barney Stinson. I almost couldn't hold back my tears, the most AWESOME compliments ever, bro!
  34. All around me are getting engaged and married. I am just getting awesome!
  35. I want every single suit that Bill Gates owns. how can I make this happen?
  36. Is it really too much to ask to want to wear a suit every day? The two greatest men in history wear suits on a regular basis, Barney Stinson, and Michael Buble. I will wake up someday and wear a suit for no reason.
  37. If anyone is avoiding studying, try to think up of some awards and send them this way, the best award idea will also avail of a free shot.
  38. I've been using the word Juggernaut and the Emoticon all the week. I don't know what that indicates about my mood. Probably just think twice about crossing me, I might be motivated to punch.

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    • profile image

      Reece Josh 3 years ago

      Friends can be complicated.. When they start to space ... You got to understand.... They have out grown you... You can be mad about it or you can move on an buy... I mean make new friends. And the new ones might be better because... ' NeW is always better' - Barney Stinson..

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