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In Defense of Trolls
Originally Posted in the Forums, this was my reply in Defense against an uprising against Trolls
Oh I see, when all else fails, then we can all rest easy cause the world has one last scapegoat in our arsenal...the lowly troll.
Well I have only met one troll in my life, at least to my knowledge, His name was Freddy Fork Fingers and he only was two or three feet tall even while wearing high heels. He was rather unfavorably looking, having what I assume from some pictures posted that he had a traditionally unnaturally large nose, and his fingernails were nearly the same length. I only knew him for a short time, less than a week. He was traveling down through my neighborhood trying to sell his best friend and lifelong companion. A big fat french speaking cow - who I can only assume by some wickedly unfortunate twist of fate had been named of all things 'Deja Moo.' I never saw Freddy Fork Fingers talk, giggle or even sneeze - in fact the story is very sad. Parking his french speaking cow by a city park with a little man made lake. Freddy decided to rest himself under a shady juniper tree and take off his stilletos for a nap. When out of nowhere a militant frenchman of ill favor appeared from nowhere. He was dressed as a bad looking like a junkie reject from Circe de Solei. But in fact was a devilish and terrible Mime. Who without saying a word slit Freddys throat, stole his stillettos, chopped off Freddys head and feets, then mounted poor innocent Deja Moo bareback, blew Freddys corpse a kiss of death...and like all evil Mimes, waved one gloved hand high while spaking his gettaway cow hard to make haste.
Freddy was AWOL from the Foreign Leigion, and what remained of his body was desecrated by Interpol for no apparent reason.
Deja Moo was found hog tied outside of an adult movie theatre in Paris two nights later, she had been milked, assaulted with a chocolate pudding pop, the local police had never seen anything like this ever before, especially done to a cow.
And the allegedly troll murdering Mime is still out there someplace conducting business as usual, possibly wearing stolen stillettos and drinking chocolate milk.
I think I have made my point clear.