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Lists 101: Top Ten Britta Moments of ALL TIME!
Class is in session kids. Welcome back to a brand new Lists 101, the best Community list that no one has ever heard of! And today, we're talking Britta Perry. To some, Britta is the girl who lived in New York. To others, she's the former anarchist turned budding psycologist fighting secret war with Annie to be the love of Jeff Winger's life. But to most of us, Britta is the buzzkill, a murderer of fun so skilled that Principal Snyder from Buffy probably appreciates her. It's so bad, people have come to use her name in reference to a small mistake. Thus, that will be the focus of today. We're going to list the top ten moments of when Britta has Britta'd something. A mouthful I know. As per usual class, if your favorite Britta buzzkill moment isn't on here, it's not because I don't love it. It's because I love the other then more. Enough of explaining myself. ON WITH THE SHOW!
10. The Greendale Glee Club Christmas Pageant (Regional Holiday Music, season 3)
A minor moment in the Britta canon, seeing as, you know, this incident benefited the greater good. Seriously, Britta taking Abed's part in the pageant and ruining it helped to keep the study group from going to Regionals and exposed the dastardly Glee Club instructor (named Mr. Rad. Great name that's sadly wasted on a Glee Club instructor) as the most diabolical hater since the so called Beautiful. So all in all, this technically could be considered a moment Britta didn't Britta. That is until you see the Dean's reaction. Whenever you hear the sound of a Greendale student saying Britta's name with defeat, the moment has been Britta'd. Write that down.
9. The Chemistry Book (Biology 101, season 3)
Again, minor in the context of things as Britta only bought the wrong science book. That said, she did still buy the wrong science book. And if you've been to college, any college, you know how expensive those bad boys are. That is not a mistake you should make! I'd venture to guess Britta also threw away the receipt after buying the book, meaning she couldn't get her money back and had to pay more money to get the right one. A shame we didn't get to see that, as it would've elevated this moment into the top five.
8. Jon Stewart Impression (Accounting For Lawyers, season 2)
Never in a million years has the phrase "slow news day" reminded me more of a toddler on temper tantrum. The funniest part of it all is that Stewart is a self confessed terrible impersonator (watch The Daily Show, you'll soon find out), and if he watches Community probably got a huge kick out of someone failing to impersonate him. Like me, he probably would've wanted it to go on longer. The fact that Britta didn't continue the impression leaves me feeling the same way Chang did about Britta's impression; depressed.
7. Dungeons and Dragons (Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, season 2)
Yup, Britta somehow managed to almost ruin the epic Dungeons and Dragons. How did she do it? By trying to take up the cause of the little man. No seriously, she tried to protest the rights of a gnome and nearly cost the group a chance to get a Pegasus. Only Britta would know when to protest at the exact wrong time in a fictional universe. Thankfully, Annie came in with the save later on. By the way, just to let you all know, Annie's Hector the Well Endowed romp with the Elf Maiden is going to be number one in the top Annie moments list. I know, spoiler alert and all, but it has to be known. That scene is within best thing ever territory.
6. The Worst Christina Aguilera/ Brittany Spears Mash Up Ever (Custody Law and European Diplomacy, season 2)
I may be struggling to remember this one, as I'm pretty sure I passed out from laughter. All I remember is the dude from Dollhouse acting like his Russian personality and Britta mixing up two of the most annoying pop anthems from the late 90's. Damn the late 90's by the way. Yes, they gave us TRL and the unintentionally hilarious icon known as Carson Daly, but they also gave us TRL and all those "JUST KILL ME NOW" bubble gum pop and "WE'RE SO EDGY!" nu metal songs. If you're a fan of either of those genres and are reading this, I'm not sorry for that last statement. Alright, maybe a little. Just please don't hit me with your genie bottle.
5. Britta Britta's the Prank (The Science of Illusion, season 1)
Could we call this the origin of Britta'ing? Is that fair to say? In any event, you know you're reaching the top tier of this whole shebang when Britta's April Fools prank ends up with a corpse (donated for research. Calm down people, no one was murdered here!) on the front of Greendale's lawn. The best part is that the prank didn't even involve that; it involved Britta putting a toy hat on top of a frog. Funny? Yes. A great prank? Not even close. That she ended up Britta'ing her own prank and then immediately Britta'd everything else is just classic. Also, it led to us getting the Annie/Jeff pepper spray chase. Let's just say mistakes were made by someone there.
4. Britta Britta's Britta (Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps, season 3)
So, a lot of Britta being Britta happens in "Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps". Britta learns that her name is being used to refer to mistakes, then makes a mistake and then compounds it by using the term the wrong way. The line in question? "We should never make the Britta, of Britta'ing each other's feelings." My God, it's full of wrong! Bless Britta's heart, she's just so uncool that she can't even get the phrase named after her correctly. Hey, it's not all bad being that uncool. As Phillip Seymour Hoffman said in the classic film Almost Famous (William Miller for the win!), "The only currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone when you're uncool." Great line. You should use it Britta. Just please, don't use it wrong. Don't Britta Britta again.
3. You Are the Opposite of Batman (Biology 101, season 3)
As per usual with Britta, this incident was caused out of her trying to do good. Abed's beloved Cougar Town had been postponed till midseason (better than his hopes for The Cape), and in order to get him out of his depression, Britta introduced him to the British version of the show, Cougartown Abbey. All is well right? Wrong! Turns out, Cougartown Abbey is only six episodes (as it turns out, British TV series go by very, VERY quickly), and the revelation pretty much broke Abed, Batman in Knightfall style. Which led to one of the top five Troy lines of all time, even if it potentially makes Britta Superman. What, Superman is the opposite of Batman right? Or are we just talking in terms of cool factor? Because Superman is still cool after all. Dammit, I'm Britta'ing this column! What is going on here?!
2. The Psych Quiz (Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps, season 3)
Remember our #4 entry, when Britta Britta'd her own term? This whole episode was the lead up. Basically, our favorite budding psychology major has the entire study group take an anonymous psych quiz, and then comes to find that someone in the group is evidently psychotic. That leads to her having everyone tell a scary story to find out who it is, only for us to find out in the end that she SCANNED THE TESTS WRONG! If you're having the urge to give poor Britta a hug here, then you must not have a sense of humor. It happens. Hey, at least Britta's screw up led to another great episode, and Annie proving she is clearly the most deranged. Seriously, behind that adorable face and that peppy attitude is a vixen of epic proportions I tell you. Fear Edison!
1. Bagel (Physical Education, season 1)
I hate bagels. They're so plain, and as I don't particularly care for cream cheese either, they're basically a no go for me. At least I know how to say the word correctly though. Britta, as you can see, doesn't. Instead, she says "bagull". Yup, it's like if the words bag and seagull had the most twisted, odd love affair of all time and bagull was the result of their union. Who cares what it was, thank goodness Britta said it. It remains one of the funniest lines in the history of Community, it's made even better by the whole study group cracking up over it, and...it's just tops. Which is why it's tops on this list. It is the Britta moment to end all Britta moments. In short, it's Batman. Thank you, I'll be here all week.
That'll do it everyone. Class dismissed. I'll be back Monday for a preview of the final Community episode of the season, and I'll be back perhaps later tonight with another column for you on...something. Who knows what it could be? Till then, someone tell Aston Villa that they are killing me, save me some of those awesome chicken tenders from the Greendale cafeteria, watch Lucha Underground, bow down to the FIFA Champ, and know that DUCHOVNY probably feels the same way you do about Aquarius. Thanks NBC!