ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Movie review: Honeymoon

Updated on September 23, 2014

According to various travel websites, the number one destination for couples to spend their honeymoon is Hawaii. However, considering that Southend on Sea – featuring the world's longest pier – doesn't even appear in their top tens, means their results can pretty much be taken with a pinch of salt.

But what if you don't have the kind of money to splash out for Hawaii – or Southend for that matter – where could you possibly have a fun time on the cheap? Well, what says romance more than a cabin in the woods, right?

Young couple in love Bea (Rose Leslie) and Paul (Harry Treadaway) have just got married. As they are just starting out together, they don't have the cash to spend on a lavish honeymoon. Luckily for them, Bea has a little family retreat in the woods, next to a lake, that isn't at all a bit creepy, where they can hang out with each other post wedding.

It's not in the best of condition, the electrical wiring for instance has seen better days, but despite there being a bear skin on one of the alls, it isn't at all a bit creepy, and perfect for their needs.

One day they pop out to a local restaurant, where the owner growls at them that they're not open. He takes a closer look at Bea and recognises her; they used to be friends when they were young and Bea and her family came up to the lake. Although slightly friendlier in his demur – to Bea at least – he still acts worryingly odd. Luckily for them, the restaurant is closed, so they go on their way.

As the days go on, Paul starts to notice little changes in Bea; she doesn't quite seem her usual self, and these odd marks start to appear on her inner thighs. The more time the pair spend together alone in the woods, the more their honeymoon becomes even more memorable, but for all the wrong reasons.

If you like your fantasy telly, then this films two leads will be quite familiar to you; Leslie appeared in Game of Thrones as Ygritte, and Treadaway played Victor Frankenstein in the recent gothic drama Penny Dreadful. What's interesting, and sadly this nugget of information is probably the most interesting thing about this film, is that both these British actors are playing American characters. Considering that they are the only major characters in it, it's surprising that Americans weren't cast in the first place. Still, the home-grown pair do really well, considering.

Leigh Janiek, who not only co-scripted the film, makes his directorial debut with it, is obviously a fan of slow-burning films. Unfortunately, he takes this plodding nature to new, dull levels. The problem is that the premise of the film could just be spun out to half an hour of air time, for something like an episode of <i>The Twilight Zone</i>, but a full ninety minutes proves a stretch too far.

Much hangs on the two leads, mostly because they are pretty much in every scene from beginning to end, and they work truly hard to evoke a sense of the supernatural. They're also helped admirably by the guy providing the plinky plonky sound effects, who they certainly got their money's worth from.

Janiek makes the school boy error of leaving his big idea for the last fifteen minutes of the film. Not only that, he also decides to leave the audience with a fair amount of ambiguity as to what exactly happened during the last hour and a half. With the amount of down time they have to endure, it would be difficult not to walk away from this experience feeling disappointed by the lame payoff.

Still, both Leslie and Treadaway give more of themselves than the film deserves, and Janiek's various sprinkling of hints of horror might be enough for some to get them to the end with little rewards. And it has to be said, that you can guarantee that a scarier time would have been had by all if they did end up going to Southend.

3 booms


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)