New Smack Talk
Have you recently put the smack down on someone and felt tired of disparaging them with the same old phrases? Fear not! I now provide fresh barbs and jeers to let your victims know how witty and skilled you are.
· Put that in the oven and bake it.
· Put that in the food processor and puree it.
· Put that in a pan and baste it.
· Mark that on your answer sheet and fill in the answer circle completely.
· Put that in your rectum and shit it out.
· Put that in your bank account and accrue interest on it.
· Your table just got bussed!
· Put that in spandex and write a comic about it.
· Spill chemicals on that and wash it off in the safety shower.
· Douse that in gasoline and torch it.
· Mug that and take its wallet.
· Steal that and pawn it.
· Hijack that and fence it.
· Put that on a leash and take it for a walk.
· Rent that and watch it.
· Put that under oath and cross-examine it.
· Collect that and alphabetize it.
· Take that to the Laundromat and dry-clean it.
· Adopt that and raise it.
· Put that in your stock portfolio and trade it.
· Kill that for its beliefs and canonize it.
· Don’t make me naturally select your ass.
X that and Y it!