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Octo Mom, Angelina Jolie And The Advent Of The Human Litter

Updated on March 30, 2009

Rumor has it that Angelina Jolie is donating money to the infamous Octo-Mom (Nadya Suleman), the woman who just wouldn't quit breeding and now has 14 children, or 36 children. I forget, and to be fair, so does she.

According to Star Magazine (a paragon of truth if there ever was one), Angelina decided to donate to Octo-Mom's cause because she is well aware of the financial strain a many child brood can cause. I'd quote the source, but that's probably a waste of time seeing as I don't know who they are. Anonymous sources aren't worth the electrical energy it took someone's mind to make them up.

Now if this is true and let's face it, it's probably not, there could be implications. Secret agendas. Shady back room deals in smoke filled nurseries. Like perhaps Angelina could actually be commissioning her next children right at home in the good ol' USA. With a recession on importing disadvantaged babies from overseas is becoming increasingly expensive. The freight alone is ridiculously expensive, not to mention the monies needed to bribe authorities to convince them to relax normally strict international adoption laws.

If the Jolie-Pitt clan is to continue expanding at the epic rate it has been for the past 5 years or so, drastic measures are needed. Angelina's womb can only produce so many children before her money making figure becomes negatively impacted for good, so outsourcing the breeding just makes sense.

Would Nadya Suleman have babies for monetary gain alone? This writer believes it to be possible. The notion of surrogates is not a new one, but the potential for multiple births has raised the reproductive rate bar far higher than ever thought medically possible or responsible. Instead of producing just one baby for a couple that cannot bear their own children, eight couples could be satisfied in just 9 short months. Sure there are thousands of kids in state facilities who would love a home, but most of them are totally shop soiled, being over a few months of age.

Seems sick and strange, yes? However a woman's body is her own domain, and should she choose to bear forth dozens of children she can ill afford financially or emotionally (let's face it, there is only so much quality time you can give 14 children) then so be it. Perhaps instead of being reliant upon the state for welfare, more celebrities and even corporations could sponsor the offspring. Little AIG might not be popular at school, but everyone would love little Pillsbury.

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      Gunnau 9 years ago from Central Coast NSW Australia

      Hi Hope

      I love this one. Very funny.

      Just what your country needed was another 8 welfare recipients.

      I noticed Mad-Donna was not to be out done by heading to some shite hole country to hand pick a good looking orphan. As you said, all the local ones are shop soiled and are not worth the hassle.

      I think Octo-Mom was thinking of the publicity\movie scripts that was overdue.

      I think it was Bl**dy irrisponsible of her and the idiot doctor that allowed her to go ahead with pretending she was a cat.

      I did notice a similarity in the looks of both women on the cover of the

      magazine. Maybe that was the only thing that obsessed Angelina.

      If little Pillbury is not popular, Babcock, Brown, GM and Chrysler may be.

    • earnestshub profile image

      earnestshub 9 years ago from Melbourne Australia

      Very funny and entertaining and a bit dark. I liked it a lot, someone needed to make a few observations about children as chattels.

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