Once Upon A Time -- Cora The Horror Returns
The writers need to stop trying to turn this show into a LOST retread
One could be forgiven for thinking they were watching an episode of Lost as all the fairy tale sycophants were gathered around the Pretender Prince looking for him to tell them what to do. It was a scene straight out of Lost with all the castaways gathering around Jack wanting him to tell them what to do. While Jack went off chasing the ghost of his dead father, Charming went off chasing a magic hat looking for his beloved Snow White. And both Jack and Charming would abandon all these people in a second for their own selfish wants and needs.
You know, it's really hard to call a character so smug and insufferable Charming. There isn't anything in the least about him that's charming. His overbearing smugness went off the charts in scenes with Regina and Rump. Regina could have saved her breath pointing out how he abandoned his new born baby in a tree trunk. Just like his equally smug wife, any home truths about their less than stellar characters goes in one ear and out the other. That's why Snow and Charming make the perfect fairy tale characters; they're totally unreal.
When Geppetto was looking for Pinocchio it reminded me of the fact Uncharming's mother might possibly be in Storybrooke and has he given her two seconds of thought? Nope. He mentioned his Mama's ring, but there were no real thoughts of his mother. But then he ran from King Charlie's Widmore's castle to go chasing after his beloved Snow even though King Charlie threatened to kill his mother if he didn't marry Kathryn. So he's basically a lousy son and an equally lousy father. And we know what a love cheat he was when he thought he was married to Kathryn but wanted MM. He also apparently stole King Charlie's castle and kingdom from him and took them for his own. I fail to find one redeeming quality about this smug doofus.
Anyway, Uncharming dropped by Regina's to beat her over the head with his insufferable smugness to make her tell him all about Jefferson's hat and for some reason she revealed to the doofus that the hat opened the portal into their land. Then he trotted over to Rump's and treated him to his brand of insufferable smugness wanting something from Rump to help him track down the owner of the hat. It's almost funny how smug and disdainful Uncharming is to Rump but whenever he needs help, he has no problem going to him. And even though Rump helps him, he also has no problem stabbing him in the back and trying to bring him down. There should be a stronger word than hypocrite for that kind of behavior.
Rump gives his royal lowness a vial to put on the hat to lead him to it's owner in exchange for Uncharming to leave him alone. I was kind of mystified why Rump is supposedly so fearful of Uncharming. As mystified as why everyone is falling to their knees and kissing his butt. But then I had the same problem with Jack Shepherd on LOST.
To cut to the chase, while the loyal Uncharming sycophants are sure their beloved prince, who they would willingly die for, is off thinking about them and how to solve their problems, he was off chasing a hat trying to find a way to abandon them so he could find his beloved Snow White. Not that I'm sure it would change their minds about their fearless leader, since they were all willing to suffer the curse as long as their beloved Snow White and Uncharming were able to escape it and they were the cause of it.
Meanwhile Dumpy [Dreamy + Grumpy] decides they must know what happens if you try to leave Storybrooke, so he tosses Sneezy over the town line and it causes him to forget he's Sneezy and believe he's his Storybrooke persona, once again. And coming back to Storybrooke doesn't change that. So Dumpy decides he and the other dwarfs should go back to being Fairy Slaves and mine fairy dust for them so they can get their magical powers back. Supposedly, so Sneezy can recalls who he is. Apparently, Dumpy is so dedicated to his beloved royals he hasn't given Nova a second thought. Of course, Amy Acker is over on Person Of Interest, the last I saw her, so she may not be available and maybe when the slave comes up from the mines he'll go and see her.
Regina is tired of having no power, so she also pays Rump a visit. She wants her mother's magic book. Once she has it, she's able to suck the magic inside of herself and the apples on her tree go from dead and black to ripe and red once more. Then she shows up at the townsfolk meeting and goes all magic over all their butts until Henry agrees to leave with her. And where is their fearless leader while all this is going on? Why he's chasing the hat as it leads him to Jefferson. Then he's getting in Jefferson's face, cause you know when someone is nasty and threatening to you, you just want to help them. Jefferson does what anyone would. He basically knocks Uncharming on his butt and runs off.
Uncharming is thwarted from chasing after his prey when Red shows up demanding he put the town before his own personal matters. He blocks the way out of town with his truck and basically gives Jack's Live Together Die Alone speech from Lost. The sycophants eyes are shining as they stare as their big brave hero and head back to town, not realizing he had to be forced to put the townsfolk first and that if he could get through the portal he'd leave them all high and dry in a New York Minute.
Then the fool rushes over to Regina's with his stupid sword in hand. Does the dimwit think if Regina's got her magic going his wittle sword will stop it? Regina deals with the idiot with class and tells Henry he can go. That she knows she can't make him love her. Uncharming sticks his sword back up his butt and leaves with Henry. After their gone, Regina is about to burn the magic book, but changes her mind at the last moment. Something tells me that's going to be a wise decision and she's going to need it, because when the idiot Charming mother and daughter duo return, I think they're going to bring something with them that Regina will need her magic to protect everyone from.
This whole episode was creepily reminiscent of the season 1 episode of LOST called White Rabbit. In it the camp was running out of water and Jack abandoned everyone to go chasing after his dead daddy not giving them another thought. When he returned to camp, and everyone was turning on Boone for stealing the water, he gave the Live Together Die Alone speech which appeased them all and everything went back to normal.
Meanwhile, in the remains of the Enchanted Forest, MM and Emma were being lead to Mulan's camp. MM decides to show what a he-man she is and kicks Aurora. I was personally cheering when Mulan threw a rock at the witch and knocked her out. Then just like Sawyer, Michael and Jin when they met the Tailies in season 2 of LOST, Emma and MM are thrown in a pit. Instead of meeting Ana-Lucia there, Emma meets Cora. Yep, Regina's big bad Mommy is still alive.
Rump stares at the city line knowing he dare not cross of he'll lose all his memory of Bae and his purpose for coming to this world will be over. My guess is he planned this whole thing down to the minute detail so he could be free to leave Storybrooke to go search for Bae. Only it's backfired and there was some unforeseen complication. He can't cross the town limits line. Possibly it was a byproduct of bringing magic to Storybrooke. If he hadn't insisted on getting his magic back, he might have been able to leave Storybrooke and search for Bae. Once again, by choosing magic he's lost his chance with Bae, again.
The backstory this week was how Regina and Rump met. Even after Daniel's death, Regina was trying to escape from her impending marriage to Snow's father. Only her mother wouldn't allow her to be free.
Going to Henry for help was a waste of time. You can really see why Regina held the man in such contempt. He did nothing to help her, because he was afraid of her mother. No wonder she went along with Rump's demand she rip Henry's heart out to make the curse work. Being the sacrificial lamb was the most Henry ever did for his daughter.
Regina had to depend on herself to get her freedom. She snuck into Cora's room and stole her spell book. The book actually belonged to Rump and Regina summoned him. It turns out it was Rump who taught Cora how to use magic.
Some of the stuff Rump said to Regina makes me wonder if it's possible Rump could be her father. He said they were back together where they belonged and that he knew her when she was much younger. Perhaps a baby? The sad thing is if he is indeed Regina's real father, he put finding Bae ahead of her. He basically played the serpent to Regina's Eve in the Garden Of Eden as he seduced her into using magic, saying one day she would do something for him. He needed her to enact the curse so he could come to this world to search for Bae and if Regina shunned magic that would never have happened.
Anyway, Rump gives Regina a mirror that will send Cora to an annoying little place where Cora will never be able to bother her again. At first, Regina doesn't want to do it, but when Cora starts using magic on her again, Regina pushes Cora through the looking glass. I still think it was Cora who was the Queen Of Hearts in Wonderland.
Anyway, this episode gave us a lot to ponder in regards to Regina and Rump. While Rump may love Belle, I think his true love is Bae. He was willing to leave her behind in Storybrooke to go looking for Bae. There isn't anything Rump won't do to find Bae.
I also still think Jefferson is going to turn out to be Bae. Uncharming kept from Rump Jefferson's hat. Jefferson was able to do magic to make the hat work. Maybe being the child of The Dark One also gave Bae magic powers and that's how he could make the hat work. In Wonderland he wasn't able to because it was a place without magic. Rump assumes the place the Blue Fairy sent Bae was to our world, but what if it was to Wonderland?