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Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief
By Order of the Gods!
From the creators who brought you the "Harry Potter" franchise, comes an epic tale like no other. "Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief" essentially takes place within our world, where the children and many ancestors of the gods themselves live among the humans in secret. Some living average normal lives with no clue as to their true godlike origins. Where others hide among the public view in the realm of royalty and politics. Then there's the lucky few that get to go to a special training ground, where the demi gods train to hone their skills and hidden powers in combat. As it seems, each demi god possesses abilities of their parents, but seldom few ever learn how to use it. Needless to say, Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is one of those kids, who have no clue as to his true godlike origin. As far as he knows, his father essentially abandoned him as a baby, and his mom is stuck married to some would be jerk. Which really isn't that far from the truth, but it's not until he finds out later there was a reason he had to live his life that way to survive. However, I won't spoil it for those who have yet to see the movie.
As I said earlier, Percy Jackson is an average kid in life, but gets his entire reality shaken when he gets accused of stealing (Sean Bean) Zeus' infamous lightning bolt. Allegedly known to be the most powerful weapon in the Olympian history. Don't ask what automatically leads Zeus to believe Percy was the one responsible for stealing his lightning bolt, as I'm sure there had to have been other likely suspects. After all, if it were me, I probably would've suspected one of the demi bastard children in the training camp before I would ever accuse Percy. Simply because if he doesn't even know he's a demi god in the first place, then how would he know enough to steal the lightning bolt in the first place? Plus, wouldn't he have to know about his godlike origins in order to visit Olympus to steal it? Then again, it wouldn't be much of a story if Zeus used any kind of common sense to deduce who took his bolt.
Long story short, both Hades and Zeus are somehow convinced that Percy is hiding this alleged powerful weapon. Now, it's up to Percy and his friends to clear his name and find the stolen bolt, before Zeus damns humanity due to a simple misunderstanding. The story is fairly cut and dry, and offers many unique references to Greek mythology weaved into our own modern culture. Although one has to wonder why Greek figures like Medusa (Uma Thurman), Hades (Steve Coogan), and Zeus have hide outs within the United States. Wouldn't they more likely have locations in Greece, since that was where these historical fabled legends' originated. What makes the United States so special? Is it because the Greek gods like our customs and national anthem more? Or is it because the writers thought that the United States was a much cooler location to have the story take place?
Plus, there was a few action scenes in this movie, I felt were unnecessary. Like the infamous battle scene with the multiple headed dragon, for instance. Sure, like the "Matrix Reloaded" battle sequence between Neo and infinite number of Agent Smiths seemed pretty cool, but was it honestly necessary? I mean seriously? In the "Matrix Reloaded", Neo could fly away at any point in that battle without having to fight any of the Agent Smiths at all. Yet he waited until after he beat up like the millionth Agent Smith look alike to finally figure out, "hey there's too many of them, so I'll fly away for now." Gee, for someone so powerful, you sure are dumb as sin for not realizing that sooner. You knew you could have flown away at anytime, but you waited until you beat up like over a million of them look alike jerks to figure out your surrounded? How dumb do you have to be? Neo may have been very powerful but a battle strategist, he is surely not. Some of you maybe reading this wondering, "what does that have to do with this movie?" Well, the answer is fairly simple, as I'll gladly explain. (Warning: Next Paragraph contains a spoiler)
Before the battle with the multiple headed dragon, Percy and his pals were able to get Medusa's head off. Believing that her head might prove useful in combat. Good strategy. Except for the fact that when they face the dragon, they quickly forget about the head in their pack. Instead, they choose to battle the dragon with swords and shields. Don't get me wrong, it was a cool fight scene and many of you will probably argue saying they were probably too scared to think logically. Plus, they are teenagers after all, so I'll buy that. Although isn't Percy's girl friend, Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario), and ally in this adventure, the daughter of Athena? You know, the goddess of wisdom. Plus, if I were to understand this story line correctly, all bastard children of these gods inherit the abilities of their godlike parents, am I correct? Therefore, shouldn't Annabeth been the first one to deduce that they could use the Medusa head right from the start, to save themselves the risk and time of fighting said dragon? Instead of immediately jumping to use her bow and arrows to fight the thing. Oh well, like Zeus' lack of common sense, this wouldn't be much of a story if the main protagonists did use common logic.
Although I've been bashing this movie for quite a bit, that's not to say that this film doesn't have it's positives. One obviously being the special effects. I think in this day and age of modern CGI, it's practically expected that all films have great special effects. Therefore, I doubt seriously most people will care too much about the flaws in the story, since the visual eye candy alone does a great job to distract the audience that they're watching a cliched predictable film. Plus, I felt the acting performances of Pierce Brosnan (Mr. Brunner/Chiron) and Sean Bean were very well done. Although it was sad to see they weren't in more of the film.
Overall, I felt the special effects and fight choreography were best parts about this movie, as I'm sure many fans will go gaga over this eye candy. Although the story leaves too much to be desired, and too many plot holes to ignore. Personally, I think most audiences would be better off just reading the freaking book, "Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief", and not even bother with this film, as the movie literally just plain stinks. Unless a decent story line isn't that important to you as special effects, then knock yourself out with this film. However, if you expect a strong script to go with your helpings of eye candy, then you'll have to keep moving on, as this film doesn't have anything outside of the visuals. By orders of the Greek gods themselves, I banish thine film to the realm of Hades.