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Ravenswood -- Saving Moronda

Updated on November 20, 2013

Mad Max

The show had a genuine moment that actually gave me the craps and it was the evil child Max singing as the Foolish Four walked up the stairs in the creepy haunted house. Otherwise the so-called attempts at being scary left me yawning.

Caleb, through his Moronda connection realized that the ghost she went off with are shucking and jiving her. Mama Ghost waked Moronda and Daddy Ghost comes in. Then they introduce her to creepy blonde Max [who seems to be the little girl that was hanging out with the dwarf in the Halloween special that Hanna was obsessed with because of Ali's twin story]. They say they found her on the lawn one day and she can't talk. She can, however, spin her head. Stealing from The Exorcist when stupid Moronda had her back turned creepy Max twisted her neck around so the front of her face was aligned with the back of her body.

When Caleb woke up from his psychic love link dream he learned Henry, the old dude that gave him the mysterious metal box, is dead. Ray says she was scared to death and he's seen it before. I'm sure.

The Foolish Four try to figure out what the documents in the strong box mean. Luke decided to stop fighting it while Sideshow Bob...I mean, Remy, is still all bent out of shape because Luke kissed Tess. Of course, Olivia isn't thrilled when she finds out.

Anyway, Remy goes a sleep walking again, but this time down to the basement of her house and not in front of a car. She wakes up and notices her hand is bleeding. She believes IT is leading the Foolish Four to her basement for a reason.

From the papers in the metal box they discover that Original Caleb and Moronda were in love. They break down a brick wall and I'm like, "Didn't you idiot ever see the Amityville Horror? Things got worse when they broke down that brick wall. Or how about 666 Park Avenue?" Behind it they find the skeletons of Original Caleb and Moronda sitting all nicely in chairs. In a letter on the floor written by Original Moronda is their belief that they could reverse the curse by dying or something like that. Wasn't really paying that much attention. I was too distracted by that awful hair of Remy's. All I can see is Sideshow Bob when I look at her. And Moronda's craptastic do isn't much better. I'm like could someone please takes some scissors and even this chick's hair out so it looks halfway decent.

Anyway, the Foolish Four or in this case three decide new age Caleb and Moronda are the key to making this all go away, but Caleb claims he has no love connection for Moronda.

Dylan, Olivia's boyfriend, offers to help her figure out the contents of the strong box. Her hair bothers me, too. It's too perfect. She looks like a perfectly groomed Barbie doll.

Anyway, the Foolish Four go to this old creepy mansion where Devil Child Max bedevils them and stupid dumb inane [did I already say stupid?] Moronda won't believe her little fantasy life isn't real. When Ghost Mommy comes through the door, Moronda tests her and Ghost Mommy fails the test. You'd think being a ghost you'd have the right answers, but apparently not.

Then the teens jump out a window to escape the evil devil child and the fact that room is falling down around them. Even knowing her little fantasy isn't real the stupid moron Moronda just keeps standing there and since Caleb won't leave without this moron he almost dies because of her. Correction, he does die.

He can get all touchy-feely with Moronda and tells her he feels this is where he belongs. But she sends him back to the land of the living. Meanwhile, Olivia's boyfriend, Dylan, this devil child Max walking around the corridors of the hospital and follows her. Turns out their in cahoots and he's helping the devil child plot against the Foolish Four.

Caleb may have had some help saving Moronda. Grunwald starts whispering in Ray's ear that it wasn't too late to save Moronda. So he goes to the graveyard and digs her grave up and takes another sample of her hair. Seems when Moronda took the hair sample from him the stupid moron put this whole thing into action and that Ray's dead hair collection serves some greater purpose. Seriously, whose writing this stuff?

Seriously, it seems Moronda is the cause of everyone's problems. She nearly got the Foolish Four killed when she grabbed the wheel of the car and it's a miracle only she died. And now she's hanging around continuing to cause trouble for these people. Talk about a harbinger of bad news.

The final scene of what is serving as the Fall Finale is the little devil child in the cemetery. Raven's are flying in the air and one lands on her arm. Then she looks creepily into the camera. Ooh, not scary.

This episode was quite a hairy experience pun intended. You had Ray and his dead hair collection having some kind of magical powers. Then there was the really bad hair vs too perfect hair competition. Remy's hair is like the worse. It's marginally better when she has it tied back. She really does look like Sideshow Bob. Then there's Moronda and her weird hair with it's long strands in the front and short in the back mess. While on the other end of the hair spectrum we had the too perfect coiffured hair of Olivia and Devil Child Max that made them look like plastic Barbie dolls. So far the only girl with good hair is Tess. She looks normal.

Meanwhile, I don't think Remy told her parents that they'd got two dead skeletons sitting down in the basement. It sure didn't look like they called the police. I'm sure at some point her parents are going to come down to the basement and find them. Maybe she'd like to tell them before one of them goes down to the basement and keels over from a heart attack from stumbling upon the nasty surprise waiting for them.


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