Review of the Album "Kings of Beer" by German Thrash Metal Band Tankard

At this point it is better to consider German thrash metal band Tankard the kings of thrash metal in Germany instead of what their 2000 album title is. Their 2000 studio album called Kings of Beer is the one that we will analyze next. The album sees a return but not a full return in the literal sense to the band’s fast, heavy thrash metal style that we have seen from this band since their arrival on the heavy metal scene in 1982. Or is it really? Kings of Beer is a mixture of thrash metal, blues, and 1960’s style oldies riffing mixed in and the result is a pretty good album.

When you are good as a band, it can be like a good infection in a sort of funny way because even when you are not at your finest moment musically, sometimes you still excel enough and that’s the case with Tankard. Initially my plan or desire was to review B-Day first but the intuition to review this album came after those initial plans. To word this more humorously, Tankard are a group of guys that were "infected" or born with the skill of playing fun, fast, and entertaining thrash. This entertainment would surface in 2002's B-Day with songs such as Rectifier.

Hot Dog Inferno has a sort of punk metal feel to it as here is what I meant when I said that the album wasn’t a full return to thrash metal for Tankard. The song is a humorous attempt at trying to explain how fried, heavy foods can fry our brains and have adverse effects on it. Once again, the point will be emphasized that healthy eating is essential to a long life, however Americans’ obsession with fast food has become part of the culture as rates of heart disease and cancer have skyrocketed. Eating French fries or meat will not be good for your digestive system as the hot dog will leave a person’s body full of fats and toxins. It is just a song that tries to address the effects of an unhealthy diet. At the end of long day at the office, eating a diet high in fat is not conducive to healthier living.

And the song called Kings of Beer which is mostly a Metallica influenced slower song has the message that while other bands come to play, Tankard comes to have fun and party! The album is definitely slowed down but it is just in speed as Tankard still continues to shine musically. This album may be one that you might want to listen to before eating some fine food! If you do that, you will have ate your next meal after listening to one of the “kings” of the thrash metal genre, Frankfurt Germany’s Tankard. Incredible Loudness has some oldies style guitar play before the song gets heavier and Andreas Geremia lets out a shout showing you that this band means business when it comes to partying style thrash metal! The first song called “Flirtin’ With Desaster” (that’s how the song title is spelled) is about the effects of a life of heavy drinking and the effect on a person’s bowels. If you don’t feel good, it is time to change your diet.

Talk Show Prostitute is a song about someone that appears on TV willing to earn a paycheck for these activities. But sadly, the future of the medium known as TV will be dominated by programs that are explicit and we as viewers must be careful what we view. Regardless, the song is a quite entertaining one.

Once again, Tankard addresses the flaws of the US justice system by in the song called Land of the Free pointing out that you can be arrested for jay walking, meanwhile people such as O.J. Simpson was able to walk away free because of the access to money and good legal representation. America in this aspect is not the land of the free as it claims to be. The song is one of the weaker ones in the album in spite of the riffing. The best songs in Kings of Beer are Flirting With Disaster (the way that it should be spelled), Dark Exile, Hot Dog Inferno, and Talk Show Prostitute.