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Secret Life -- I Still Don't Think They Got Married
George comes home from walking the dog and finds a trinity of mothers waiting for him. They all think Amy and Ricky eloped and none are happy about it. Nora and Margaret get in a bit of a pissing contest over which one of them is more Ricky's mother. The one who raised him or the one who pushed him out of her body.
You know, Amy and Ricky should consider moving away, because while she was out of town, she actually seemed happy and got along good with Ricky. She even said something nice about George. But the minute she walked into her house she started sniping at Ricky and acting like a sourpuss again. And Ricky started sniping at Amy because she wanted to call and check on Ben to see how he was. Ethan told Amy that news of her marriage gave Ben a stroke or heart attack, when all he did was faint and insist the ambulance take him to the hospital.
Anyway, I think Ricky and Amy were going to reveal they didn't get married, unfortunately, George went into this big speech about how proud he was of them, and I think they lost their nerve and lied that they went through with eloping. Ann even told a little story of how she lied that she'd gotten married.
Meanwhile, Leo goes over to visit Pudding Pop wanting to know the truth about the fire. I think Pudding Pop knows Dylan is to blame for the school burning down and he's lying to protect her. Leo wants the kids to tell the truth, but The Pop tells Leo to let it go and to let him handle it.
It turns out that Jack's new girlfriend who is really Daniel's old girlfriend is only dating Jack to spy on Adrian indirectly to make sure she's staying away from Ben. She's hoping Dylan and Ben break-up so she doesn't have to see Jack anymore. Jack apparently knows this because he goes to Grace wanting her to give him any dirt he can use to parlay him favors from Raven. Can I say just how truly pathetic Jack is. First he's acting like Grace's doormat and now he's using info to get in with another girl. Dude, get some pride.
All that talk about Dylan being crazy and evil seems to finally be growing teeth. What with her getting her friend Raven to date Jack just to keep tabs on Ben and Adrian and lying to her mother that she and Ben never went into the science lab.
Adrian decides to pay Ben a visit. She's wondering why her father asked if there was any chance of her and Ben getting back together. She wants to know if he and her father have been talking. He assures he hasn't spoken to her father, but he goes over to speak to him. On the way there he runs into Ethan who tells Ben that Ricky and Amy eloped. He doesn't take the news well. He managed to make it to Adrian's house before he faints at her father's feet.
I think we all know that despite all Ben's claims of loving Dylan, he's still in love with Amy and may always be in love with her. Dylan is just basically a distraction from Amy. If he thought he had a shot with Amy he'd drop Dylan in a New York minute.
Probably my favorite moment of the night was when Adrian basically told Grace she was a sanctimonious hypocrite who cloaked herself in religion whenever she thought she'd done something bad. Like getting Adrian to kiss her.
Ann finds out about Ashley and Toby sleeping together. She also reveals to Ashley that she got accepted into an Italian cooking school, but doesn't want Ashley to take Toby with her if they allow her to go. In return, Ashley [showing as much concern as she's capable of showing for Amy] says she hates the idea of seeing Amy married in high school and Ann isn't too thrilled about it, either.
Leo shows up at the hospital and isn't buying into Ben's Camille act and tells him to get up. He's honest with his father and afraid he's going to end up going to prison for starting the fire.
The promo for next week's show says they'll be showing what really happened in the Chapel Of Love and I think what happened is they didn't go through with getting married. There was enough foreshadowing in this week's episode to hint that. Ann with her little fake marriage story. Ashley telling Toby her family is a family of liars who are always keeping secrets.
If that's the case, I think this story is as dumb as our nation's birthday is a gay holiday or Grace the holy hypocrite.