ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Seduction in a Construction Zone

Updated on April 24, 2009

New water lines were put in my town last year. At first I was put off because that meant a construction crew would be taking over the main road through town making a two minute drive to the school at least a ten minute drive. Oh I can hear you scoff at me over complaining about an extra eight minutes when it takes much longer than that to get from one point to another in large cities. However, this is a place that has no stop lights. There’s one blinking light in the whole county and most of us aren’t even aware it’s there most of the time. Anyway, the main road through town is the only way for me to take my daughter to the high school. There is no short cut or alternate route, so four times a day I had to make my way through the orange construction cones and past the man who holds the powerful stop and go sign.

From the very first day of construction the stop/go sign guy, whom I began referring to as “cone man” because he was always standing by a large orange construction cone, started giving me the eye. You know, the kind of eye that says, “Yo momma, c’mon over here and let me show you some lovin’ construction style.” My daughter caught sight of this immediately. She was dumbfounded and grossed out all at the same time. “Eeewww mom! That guy is so totally checking you out!”

Now it wasn’t that this cone man was gross or anything. In fact, I was quite impressed that his jeans fit him so nicely and revealed a backside that was rather round and fit looking. He was an average looking guy. Not hard on the eyes, yet not crash-my-car gorgeous. My daughter’s problem was that cone man was probably in his late twenties, while I am a forty-something mother. I guess that kind of makes me a MILF, although I didn’t know what a MILF was until someone enlightened me not so long ago. For anyone who doesn't know, it's a term used by men to describe a woman who is a mother that one would like to have sex with.

My daughter was still laughing as we reached the school, and before she got out of the car I told her to not be so hard on my cone man which sent her into tear producing laughter. Secretly I started wondering what could be wrong with this guy if he was indeed checking me out. I mean, I was old enough to be his, um, much older sister or something. I wasn’t totally sure yet, but I was about to find out because I was approaching the construction zone and cone man was already looking in my direction.  As I passed him, I decided to look at his face instead of his buttocks to get a clue about his intentions. Sure enough, he was staring hard, and then he smiled and waved. I flipped up one finger, the pointer finger, to acknowledge his gesture. Yes, he was checking me out. I saw his eyes linger just a little too long on my headlights. There was no mistaking his intentions. He was flirting with me.

I must admit that this little flirty incident put me in a very good mood, and my stomach had butterflies as I went about my normal routine of picking my daughter up that afternoon. Again, as I approached cone man, his stare became intense, then a smile came across his face, and he waved at me. Not knowing exactly how to handle the situation, I smiled and gave him another finger wave. Okay, now I’m getting dangerously close to leading this guy on even though I was only doing what any southern person would do by acknowledging his friendliness. Friendliness? Maybe, but his eyes were saying something that was much friendlier than “Hello lady, have a nice day.”

After picking up my daughter, we headed back through town, and as the construction cones slowly came into view, my nerves started getting all jittery, and I was feeling kind of tingly inside - a feeling very similar to having a first date with someone. This time cone man stopped us so that traffic could come through from the opposite direction. Now I was trapped. My mind started racing over what I would do while sitting helpless in my car waiting for the cute cone man to flip the sign to “go." My eyes were darting around trying to fix on something away from him.

Don't look at him! Just look at the bank or the oncoming traffic or the corner store...anything but him!

But I had to end up looking at him so I’d know when to go. After all, he alone was in control since he held a sign that clearly stated when people should stop and when they could go. I slowly looked at him, and he was smiling as he gave me a familiar wave. This time I waved back with my full hand.

Now I’ve done it. I’ve given him a full hand wave that evidently in his language means c’mon big boy show me what you got.

He then broadened his smile and gave me a big head nod.

My daughter was livid. “Mom! What are you doing? This guy totally has the hots for you or something!” The only thing I knew to do at that moment was to diffuse the steamy situation with humor, so I casually replied, “Cone man can’t help it. I’ve still got it, all the women in our family have it, and it’s kind of like a curse.” Of course she howled with laughter, which was part of my plan to get her attention away from the evolving construction seduction.

The MILF Family Tree

From there, we had plenty of laughs over the next few weeks. I was able to back up my claims about having a curse that brings out animal attraction in men no matter how old the women in my family get. I told her about how my mother has been married three times, and the third husband fell under her spell when she was in her fifties. My daughter’s eyes got wide with wonder over that one. I mean, being fifty-something is old…to a fourteen year old anyway. The story that finally sold her was how my grandmother, my mother’s mother, was also married three times only her husbands died. One by one, they died, and I’ve always joked with my family about how Grandmother was too much woman for those men to handle. The really interesting thing is that at 85 years old, my grandmother put yet another man under her spell, and he begged her to marry him. For years he begged, and for years she told him no. I think she was worried he might die too.

After two solid generations of pure MILF women, I suppose this makes me a third generation MILF. At least that's what I'd like to believe. My daughter will be the fourth generation to carry on the tradition or curse, and I warned her to be merciful by only choosing men with strong hearts and the mental and physical strength to withstand the power of the curse. 

Will Sweatpants Bring Sexy Back?

With my daughter sold on the notion that the women in our family have an irresistible, sometimes fatal charm that arouses animal passion in men, we looked forward to driving down Main Street to see what the cone man would do next. One day he stopped us when there was no traffic coming from the other side of the road. There was no reason for him to stop us, yet he did. We gave each other our usual big smile and enthusiastic waves, but this time he began to undress my car with his eyes. Very slowly, he peeled away every inch of the vehicle until there was nothing left but me and a steering wheel. Now I was really nervous. I was used to making the top half of myself presentable, but I always neglected the bottom half since he couldn’t see it, and there I sat in my old sweatpants and flip flops. OH MY GOD! Maybe that’s why he switched the sign to GO so quickly.

Hit and Run

I was expecting cone man to quickly move on to another MILF after that, but I was wrong. As I approached the construction zone for the 3rd time that day, there he stood…my cone man holding his sign and giving me the eye. The MILF eye. It was a perplexing situation because the cones had been moved, and now they were zig zagging all around and I couldn’t figure out how to maneuver around and out of them. As I was trying to figure this out, I looked over at my cone man, and he winked at me.

How did it progress to winking after only a few weeks?

He was a bold cone man, and I was flustered beyond belief. So I inched my way out looking for a safe exit to make my turn, and he waved for me to go on while giving me another seductive wink. The second wink sent me into an emotional tailspin, I mashed on the accelerator a bit too hard and plowed right over one of his construction cones. Glancing back, I could see the cone was completely flattened and flopping helplessly in the road. I was a cone killer!

I couldn’t stop. I wanted to stop and apologize, but I was too embarrassed, so it was a clear case of hit and run. However on my way back through town later, I did stop. I rolled my window down and before I could open my mouth, he said, “Hey honey, you ran over my cone!” Apologizing profusely, I stammered, “I…I...I don’t know what I was thinking, or doing, and I’m so, so sorry for, um, you know, running over the cone, I...I…” Thankfully he stopped me in mid-babble and waved for me to make the turn down my road, and he was laughing the whole time. He knew what he’d done. He was toying with me, seducing me in his construction cone man way and getting me all flustered and distracted. As I was rounding the corner, I glanced over and cone man gave me a nod, a smile, a wave, and a wink. It was almost like those signals coaches give to baseball players. I laughed, waved, smiled and gave a little wink back.

Unrequited Love

Sadly, that was the last time I ever saw my cone man. There was no warning that it was over…no teary goodbyes…no last chance winks…no more undressing my car with his eyes… nothing. I miss him terribly, and I’m sure he misses me too. He can’t help missing me, you know, since I have the curse. Now there is more construction in our town, and I can feel those butterflies fluttering in my stomach every time I approach the "zone" and those men in their orange vests. I've looked in vain for my cone man, but he has clearly moved on. Now, as I look at the construction cones peppering the lonely roads, the sight of them makes me yearn for my cone man. Just this morning, as I passed the man who holds the stop/go sign, I refused to look at him. I couldn’t. He would only break my heart as the last cone man did.

Disclaimer: No, I wasn't really in love with cone man (although the events were real), and I do not consider myself a MILF in the least. Although my mother is a MILF and my grandmother was a MILF for sure. :)

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • arusho profile image

      arusho 5 years ago from University Place, Wa.

      That was totally hilarious!

    • profile image

      Ghost32 6 years ago

      Ah, I could only laugh lightly at this one, for I too, am painfully aware of the curse, which is possessed in full measure by MY Pam.

      When we lived in Sturgis, South Dakota--and not only during Motorcycle Rally Week, either--I used to tell people that I whenever MY Pam walked down the street, I had to follow...with a mop and a bucket, to clean up all the saliva drooling to the sidewalk from all those OTHER men following her down the street.

      At sixty, she's still got it.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      LMAO! Shoes are a huge commitment coming from me! :D

    • W. B. Isley profile image

      W. B. Isley 6 years ago from Monett, MO

      Aw shucks. You'd put shoes on just fer me. Wow! I feel special and all. ;^)

      Yes, carpentry is a must. I would definetly like to see my 'car' 'try' to 'pen' something for me. :D

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Oooh! Very impressive! I have my sneakers on ready to stand in line for the book signing. ;)

      You have a great sense of humor and I hope to see some of that in your writing! If the shiny things distract you, well...I better help you find a muse quickly (one that isn't too distracting and can do a little carpentry). :D

    • W. B. Isley profile image

      W. B. Isley 6 years ago from Monett, MO

      Greetings from the reincarnated primeis. Thanks for the advice, I took it. I'm looking forward to reading my hubs as much as you are. I read your muse hub and at this point I would welcome any gender of muse. I have Attention Deficit oooo shiny.

      Anyway, have fun and may your muse whisper in your ear soon.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Thank you for asking my opinion. I think if you want your profile here to be connected in any way to your book series or if you plan on sharing the series in hubs, then W.B. Isley sounds really good to me--professional, snappy, and like you're already an author. ;) Otherwise it's a completely personal choice on your part that depends on how you plan to use this account.

      I wish you the best!

      P.S. Yes, I saw your...um...bio. ;)

    • profile image

      primeis 6 years ago

      So you like my ... shelves. You've got some nice flowers in your picture as well.

      I have some interesting counters upstairs too and I even put a basic bio on my profile.

      A serious question, before I get to invested with this profile ID, would it make sense to scrap this one and make it W. B. Isley? I'm working on the background for a six book Sci Fi series. Is Primeis to unprofessional?

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      primeis, thank YOU for the generous comment. I will look forward to reading your hubs! For now I'll have to be content with admiring your shelves. :)

    • profile image

      primeis 6 years ago

      (Keep in mind, I'm 39.) When I grow up I want to write like this, so effortless. It is a pleasure to read your work. Thank you.

      Based on your picture, you just might more good looking than you think.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Ah, I should be thanking you for making my day (night/morning) with your kind comment. :) Thank you! MILF is such an awful (like abrasive) yet funny thing to me, so I struggled with whether or not to use it here. Thanks for taking it lightly. ;)

    • Minnetonka Twin profile image

      Linda Rogers 6 years ago from Minnesota

      This was brilliant Pam. The Cone Man story was so delightful.

      Your writing is effortless and fun to read. I also loved learning about MILF. I was laughing out loud at a Caribou Coffee. Thanks for making my day:)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Ah! You! How can I thank you for the kind comment? It's very much appreciated, and, coming from you, I'm humbled.

      About my daughter...she aspires to be a queen, but I see that Prince William is taking care of that with another woman. Hmpf. There's one more prince over there though...one down, one more to go...I'll have to find a queen school real quick. ;)

      Thank you again. :)

    • Twilight Lawns profile image

      Twilight Lawns 6 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K.

      A nicely constructed story, Pam. It just flowed, and I must say I was enjoying it so much I wanted more. Your daughter was drawn to perfection. Thank you.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Hello Neil, yes, and I'm sure he got some laughter out of it too! Wonder what his version of the story was? That would be interesting wouldn't it?

      Thanks for coming in to read!

    • Neil Sperling profile image

      Neil Sperling 6 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

      LOL - Life's little treasures. A simple flit can brighten a day - for both the giver and the receiver!

      By The Way "I'ld say you are a MILF"

      Love - Light - Laughter

      Neil

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Thank you mysterylady! I appreciate you coming in to read and De Greek for sending you here. :) Be careful with the cone men, they're smooth!

    • mysterylady 89 profile image

      mysterylady 89 7 years ago from Florida

      Thanks to De Greek, I found this. Absolutely delightful! I loved the humor, especially your daughter's reactions. I think I'll start looking for a cone man! I think I'll start following you. I love your humor.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Micky, lol! Thank you for taking the time to come in to read. I appreciate it!

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 7 years ago

      Are you sure you are not a MILF? Funny write! Thank you!

    • tonymac04 profile image

      Tony McGregor 7 years ago from South Africa

      Loved this well-written story. Thanks for sharing your cone man with us.

      Love and peace

      Tony

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Dohn, that's the best thing you could have said to me, because I want what I write to flow like a casual conversation between friends. Thank you so much. :) And you're sincerely aces in my book as well.

    • dohn121 profile image

      dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York

      I've always been told that,"You're only as old as you think" and I think that I've been 20 for the last decade! You never fail to bring a smile to my face or get me to laugh. Reading your hubs is like having casual conversation with you Pam. You're all aces in my book ;) I enjoyed every word!

      Dohn

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Foolish me! I've learned my lesson now. ;) lol! Thanks for reading this one SilverGenes. :)

    • profile image

      SilverGenes 7 years ago

      VERY funny story! Oh, the embarrassment of that slow reveal of sweatpants!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Ah! Thank you Petra! You're too kind! And I am thankful that this story lured my Greek Adonis to me! ;)

    • Petra Vlah profile image

      Petra Vlah 7 years ago from Los Angeles

      You go girl! Being a MILF does not seem to be such a bad curse after all so you should not apologize for it, especially considering that it made De Greek notice you and eventually he married you because of it (or in spite of it?). Great story

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      iantoPF, I've read some of your hubs, and you're quite an impressive writer, so the pleasure is mine that you took the time to read this. :) Thank you!

      I'm now considering the option of bus transportation. Today. Immediately. :)

    • iantoPF profile image

      Peter Freeman 7 years ago from Pen-Bre, Cymru/Wales

      This is the first one of your hubs i've read and it's great. Never been a cone man but I've been a bus driver most of my life and the opportunity to flirt is hard to pass up.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Ah! Thanks De Greek! :)

    • De Greek profile image

      De Greek 7 years ago from UK

      Funyyyyyyyyyyy......... :-) No, hilarious!! I loved the "he began to undress my car with his eyes" :-))

      I am an instant fan:-)

    • Info Help profile image

      Info Help 7 years ago from Chicago

      Hi Pam :)

      Great hub! We as women get finer with age, just like wine. Great story. I am a fan :)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Money Glitch! It's always good to know when someone can identify. :D LOL! Cone men can be such heartbreakers. ;)

    • Money Glitch profile image

      Money Glitch 7 years ago from Texas

      What a great story, I am still LOL because I can relate really well. There's nothing worst than finding a "heart throb" of a cone man and then losing him. LOL!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Chris! My writing muse and inspiration of all time! I've missed you! I must dash off to see what you've been doing or writing here!

    • Christoph Reilly profile image

      Christoph Reilly 8 years ago from St. Louis

      Hi, Pammy!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thank you so much nutuba! I understand exactly what you're saying about living in an area where it's normal to wave or even to say hello to everyone you see even when you don't know them. It's very warm and exceptionally nice. :) But do be careful! An innocent wave can ignite a flame in a woman's heart when mixed with those flirty cone man eye signals. ;)

    • nutuba profile image

      nutuba 8 years ago from North Carolina

      What a fun hub! I thoroughly enjoyed this and found myself laughing out loud. It makes me wonder though ... I grew up in the Midwest, where it's normal to wave at everybody you see on the street or sidewalk. I still have the tendency to do that ... and now I wonder if my wave is ever misconstrued. If I'm ever a cone man, I'll have to be careful about how I communicate (unless of course I really am trying to flirt. :-)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thank you RGraf! I don't know why or how your comment didn't show up in my inbox, but it didn't. So I'm sorry for the long delay in telling you how much I appreciate you stopping in to read. :) Hope you're doing well!

    • RGraf profile image

      Rebecca Graf 8 years ago from Wisconsin

      That is the BEST laugh I've had today!!!! thank you. Though I'll never look at our cone man the same again.

    • lxxy profile image

      lxxy 8 years ago from Beneath, Between, Beyond

      Embrace the MILFness.. =P Very captivating and funny read, thanks for sharing with us! =)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Hehe ralwus! I know you know all kinds of things especially these things, but I'm afraid my MILF days have abandoned me. :D It's good to see you!

    • profile image

      ralwus 8 years ago

      Yer a MILF. I know these things.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Hey Blue! I moved north, but I'm still technically considered south. ;) lol! But seriously, I moved from southern Virginia to the more northern part, and I love it. Thanks for asking, and I'll look forward to being more active very soon! :D Take care!

    • R. Blue profile image

      R. Blue 8 years ago from Right here

      Welcome Back Pam....did you move North, South, East or West?

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      {{{blondepoet}}} Hugs to you! I moved to another town that's over 3 hours away from where I was, and I've been unpacking boxes like crazy! I'm almost done though, and I hope to get my hubbing back on track very soon. I've missed you! XOXO : )

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 8 years ago from australia

      Pam how are you haven't you been here a lot miss ya x0x0x

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      {{{LM}}} Thanks! I really, really, really miss you all too! I move tomorrow, then hopefully it won't take long to get things in order so that I can hub and catch up with what's going on. :D Take care and thanks again! :)

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      Hey Paaaaaaam!! We miss you!!!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      LondonGirl, you made my day and put a smile on my face, so thank you! :) I appreciate you coming in to read.

    • LondonGirl profile image

      LondonGirl 8 years ago from London

      wonderful, just very, very funny!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thank you R. Johnson! I appreciate you coming in to read and for the very nice comment. :)

      Laughing Mom, I might be tired, but you are that funny. :D

    • R. Johnson profile image

      R. Johnson 8 years ago

      Really funny! had me literally laugh out loud. thanks for sharing..

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      I think you're just exhausted from the packing.  I'm not that funny.  But keep your eye on those c-l-i-c-k-s, you may get rich someday.  Watching the the others will probably only lead to trouble.  Fun, perhaps, but trouble. As for the beauty advice, let me know how it turns out for you. I need testimony before I'm willing to be THAT guinea pig!!!

      Miss you, too!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Laughing Mom, you've made my day! What a strong, dedicated, daredevil of a woman you are to risk your life in such a way! Now you've made it on my Christmas list! :D

      ROFLMAO AGAIN! Now I'm gonna have to keep an eye on those dicks...I mean clicks (hey typos happen!) and hope lots of women need, um, sperm. Hey, I heard it's really good for your skin too...it gets rid of cellulite overnight! Really. Go click and see for yourself. :D LOL! I think we're both so bad in a really fun way! ;)

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      Shh....you weren't supposed to tell about the cone thing. Actually, I took out a couple of them before I careened up the pile of gravel and flew over the front end loader. I was a bit breathless myself. But the kids thought it was cool. It was all worth it, Pam, if you get even just one word from him.

      And if today is the day you finally got enough clicks to get a check, you'll know someone around here is desperately seeking some....sperm. :-)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Laughing Mom! All I can do is ROFLMAO over and over and over!! You are hysterical, and I THANK you for giving me such a hard laugh!

      Eek! Sperm doner ads? What's google thinking? The next thing you know my hub won't even be readable or viewable for all the donations splattered all over the danged place! I'm outraged! ;) lol!

      What a dandy detective you are, and I think this qualifies you as my new best friend since you went to such lengths to find my cone man! And what a quick thinker you are to give him my profile address! I'll be sitting by my email night and day breathless with anticipation. :D

      I have to ask...did you run over a cone when he winked at you? ;) He has that kind of charm you know. ;)

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      Before I say what I came to say, I have to recover from laughing at the ad at the top of your hub. "Find a Sperm Donor". OMG!!!!

      Okay, I've been through six construction zones since 7:00 this morning. Only 3 had sign flipping guys, but I think I may have found your man. He was not quite 6' tall, his body proved that sign flipping isn't his regular job, his jeans fit very nicely, and he had the mirrored shades. I jotted down your profile address while I was waiting for the flip and tossed it at him as I drove by. When I came back through, he pulled the glasses down and winked. You'll probably be getting an email. :-)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks CabinGirl and santoion! I appreciate it. :)

    • santoion profile image

      santoion 8 years ago

      Very good hub.Thank You !

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      ROFL ajcor! You got me good on that one! What an embarrassing moment, but there was something in his expression that told me I wasn't the first woman to drive over one of his cones. ;) lol!

      Thank you! :)

    • ajcor profile image

      ajcor 8 years ago from NSW. Australia

      "but there are more cones in the sea".But Pam and this is the big one - only if you don't drive over them!  this was a laugh out loud hub - great - so funny....cheers

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      LM, maybe this will help...under his hard hat he has blonde or brown or auburn hair that wisps around his neck with seductive waves. His eyes are green or brown or maybe blue. Um, he wears an orange vest that fits rather snug over a shirt (unbuttoned low) that threatens to show pectoralis muscles that you want to thrust your body against and his biceps flex slightly as he turns the stop and go sign. He has a boyish grin and always seems to be glistening with sweat. ;)

      With that said, if you see one who looks like the vampire construction worker in Shadesbreath's hub (Washboard Vlad), then forget cone man and snag that one real quick! He is HAWT!

      Thanks for your help! :D

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      So far, Pam, I haven't seen one that matches the description in your hub, but then you really only described one physical 'asset'. So I'll just stay on the lookout. I'll consider it research. Good thing the speed limits are so slow in construction zones, huh?

    • Shadesbreath profile image

      Shadesbreath 8 years ago from California

      Sup Sixty! /cheers

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Shades! All I can say is thank you, thank you, thank you! You humble me, you make me smile, and I'm tickled beyond belief to see you.

      Sixty...ain't it grand? Shades is like a huge breath of fresh air. :)

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 8 years ago from South Africa

      @ Shades Hi there long time no see!

    • Shadesbreath profile image

      Shadesbreath 8 years ago from California

      A delightful story written with wonderful style and taste. A true joy to read. And, a perfect experience too, all the delight and ego balm you could wish for and no prolonged conversation to ruin it.

      I read this and just grinned thinking, "Yeah, I missed this little corner of cyber space." Nice to see you haven't lost your grasp of craft.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      LM, I'm just happy to see you now! It's always a joy to see you. So you're going to have over a year of construction guys in your area. Wow! Okay, be very careful if you make eye contact! I'll bet you're quite a saucy, milf-ish kinda gal, and it's going to drive that sign flipper guy nuts. Keep me posted! A whole year could mean an entire series of hubs for you to write. :D

      Hey wait a minute...what if my cone man ends up being YOUR cone man? Hmmm. I only have a mental picture of him, so we'll have to compare notes!

      Thanks for coming in LM! :)

    • Laughing Mom profile image

      Laughing Mom 8 years ago

      Pam, I'm disappointed that I missed this 2 weeks ago! Very funny, and I can just hear your daughter! Janetta's right. Construction zones will never be the same. We have one going on on our main road that's supposed to last over a year. I'll think about your cone man every time I pass the sign-flipping guy.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Janetta, thank you so much! Yes, it was hard getting over a cone man like that one. It took a whole dang year before I could even write an account of our love without crying all over my keyboard and getting electrocuted or something. :D

      Hey, I'll bet you ARE a MILF, and you're just being humble...a very good trait for a MILF to have cause that means you'll have mercy on your men. Maybe. :D LOL! Thanks for coming in to read and for making me laugh. :)

    • profile image

      Janetta 8 years ago

      Another great hub, Pam! I'm so sorry you lost the love of your life, Coneman. :( And don't sell yourself short, I'm sure he was hot for your body (well the upper half he could see at least) because you are totally a MILF! :) I like to think I'm a MILF too, though I'm sure that's not the case...oh well, I will never go into a construction zone the same again LOL

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      KCC, you've got it going on for sure! Work it girlfriend! :D What you said about your daughter is so funny because mine has said similar things, like "He's only being nice to you because of ME." lol! So I call her my "wing"...she reels 'em in and the curse takes over from there. ROFL! ;) Of course, I'm kidding, but I do call her my "wing" now (like in the Pickup Artist show). ;)

      Thank goodness for shift changes and hot waiters! :) It is a squirmy yet very flattering feeling, and what a fun story. You've got the MILF thing going on for sure! Heck I'll bet you got all kinds of extra good service that night. :) Thank you for sharing that story! It sounds like an experience that would make a very entertaining a hub. :)

      Thanks for coming in to read AND for the great story. :D

    • KCC Big Country profile image

      KCC Big Country 8 years ago from Central Texas

      Great story, Pam!  My daughter thinks it's hilarious when guys flirt with me.  She, of course, likes to think they are only flirting with me to get to her.   Mauahahahaha.....she's not yet been introduced to the MILF 'curse'.  She and I recently had a nice dinner out.  For the majority of our visit we had a nice waitress, but they had a shift change and we ended up having two fine young gentlemen wait on us.  One was training the other.  The experienced waitor was most definitely checking me out.  He had incredible eye contact. The kind of piercing direct contact that made me squirm uncomfortably.   Fun feeling though.  *wink*

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      BP, thank you! It's always a joy to see you! :)

      Pest, no worries! I'm just happy to see you and hope you're doing well. :)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 8 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      I have to read this and comment later! I am so sorry I have missed your stuff!

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 8 years ago from australia

      Oh Pam that was a classic hahahaha. You are one hell of a writer.(hugs)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      badcompany, what an incredibly kind and wonderful comment! I truly appreciate it, and you have me blushing with gratitude. :) Thank you!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks mayhmong! :) It was a funny experience for sure. I appreciate you coming in to read. :)

    • mayhmong profile image

      mayhmong 8 years ago from North Carolina

      Yo mama, that was too funny! You still got it going on even with the cone man.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      bunyip, ROFL! Do you do scones too? Cones AND scones are a nice combination. ;) I don't think I want to die yet, and it sounds like you have the curse too! We might both die!!! :D

      Thanks for coming in to read. :)

    • profile image

      bunyip named sue 8 years ago

      As someone once famous once said "why dont you drop in and see me some time big boy". No that's not it. What about " Frankly my dear I don't give a damn" . No..........stuff it just drop in any time you want , I do cones to die for. And you probably will !!!!! ;-)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Mellas! Craigslist...YES! That's very smart thinking OR you're a woman who is experienced in such matters as seductive cone men. :D I'm going to check out that missed connections section of Craigslist! lol!

    • MellasViews profile image

      MellasViews 8 years ago from Earth

      Pam youre hilarious! I love it! Check craigslist under missed connections... youre cone man may be looking for you. lol. If anything check craigslist anyway under missed connections, the stuff you will find is hilllarious!!!! Great enteratining Hub Pam! ; )

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Logic.commonsense...ROFL! Okay! Okay! I admit that I was very shallow and was swept away by his cones, but you should have seen them! :D Thanks for coming in, but thank you more for the huge laugh! :)

    • profile image

      logic,commonsense 8 years ago

      Pam were you attracted to his cones or did you just have an intellectual attraction? :)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Lifebydesign. :) Alas, I'm sure he's moved on, but there are more cones in the sea. :D Thanks for coming in for a read. :)

    • Lifebydesign profile image

      Lifebydesign 8 years ago from Australia

      What a sweet story Pam. I hope you get your cone man. :)

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Trish, thank you! What a nice thing you did by taking the crew donuts and coffee. Now I'll have to read that hub to see how it turned out! I hear you about being older but certainly not dead. lol! Thanks for coming in Trish, I appreciate it, and I can't wait to read about your experience. :D

    • trish1048 profile image

      trish1048 8 years ago

      This was great Pam! I can definitely relate. Although I didn't get into a flirty thing, I did approach a construction crew by bringing them coffee and donuts on a cold winter morning, which I wrote about in my Random Act of Kindness. Trust me, I would much rather have had your experience :)

      Something about truck drivers, construction workers and men in uniform, well, what can I say! :) I may be older but surely I'm not dead LOL

    • Frieda Babbley profile image

      Frieda Babbley 8 years ago from Saint Louis, MO

      Darn those ramblin' men.

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      sixty...ROFL! Now I'm speechless! :D

      Jewels, thank you, and just be careful when you see those cone men. Eye contact will get things rolling very fast, but remember they're rambling men who will break your heart!

    • Jewels profile image

      Jewels 8 years ago from Australia

      Good one Pam. I'll remember your experience the next time I see a Cone man in my area. Very visual.

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 8 years ago from South Africa

      If the Cone fits wear it?

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      bunyip, I'm not sure what a bunyip is, but I'm going to find out! :) I think you're friends with a jackalope, and if that's the case, then any friend of "the" jackalope is a friend of mine. :) Thanks for stopping in here after your escape from the leash! :)

      sixtyorso, thank you! What a funny thought about the flattened cone, like the lost glass slipper in Cinderella. :) I think he should have at least given me that cone as something to remember him by. *heavy sigh* ;) I've looked at other cone men lately, but they simply don't fill his shoes or vest or jeans. :D Thank you so much for coming in to read. It's always my pleasure to hear from you!

      Tom, you've changed your avatar again! Very nice! I liked the other one a lot too. Next time you should put a construction hat on or a traffic cone. That would be hawt. ;) Just teasing. ;) Thank you so much for the very kind compliment. I really appreciate it. :)

    • Tom Rubenoff profile image

      Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States

      Such great tension. Such gentle release. LOL You're an excellent story teller.

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 8 years ago from South Africa

      Pam Hilarous. I loved your story and the build up. A modern fairy story but the prince (er coneman) had to go. I can imagine you wandering around with the crushed cone going from site to site to see where it fits. someday my cone man will come!

    • profile image

      bunyip named sue 8 years ago

      Er excuse me miss, just wondering like. How are you with Bunyips.

      I actually got off the leash tonight so I'm free. Well until I get nabbed anyway.!

    • Pam Roberson profile image
      Author

      Pam Roberson 8 years ago from Virginia

      Enelle, thank you so much! You're so right, and that means you must clearly have the curse too. ;) :D

      I appreciate you coming in to read and for leaving such a nice comment. :)

    • Enelle Lamb profile image

      Enelle Lamb 8 years ago from Canada's 'California'

      Some of us got it and some of us don't ;) if you do? LOL enjoy the hell out of it! Funny hub...thoroughly enjoyed it!