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23 Short, Funny Quotes, Pictures and Videos

Updated on September 24, 2019
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Audrey's desire to help others understand human behavior led her to study psychology. Here, we learn ways to cope with our changing world.


Laugh a Little

Studies show that laughter promotes better health and it feels good too. When you begin to feel stressed out try to find something to laugh at. I've gathered a few hilarious quotes, photos and videos to bring you laughter and improve your day.

Now, let your endorphins run wild as you enjoy the following funny quotes and photos:

  • The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. Andy Rooney
  • I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and if I’m not in it, I go to work. A. E. Matthews (quoted in Filmgoer's Book of Quotes, 1973)
  • In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. Joey Adams
  • We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police. Jeff Marder
  • Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair. George Burns
  • Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? Benny Hill
  • When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. George Burns
  • The mistake a lot of politicians make is in forgetting they've been appointed and thinking they've been anointed. Claude D. Pepper
  • We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate. Frank McKinney Hubbard


Memorize a Quote or Two

Short, humorous quotes can help others to feel better when a rough and difficult day happens.

I make it a habit to memorize a few short, humorous quotes along with a clever and funny joke. When an opening comes along in the conversation I will pull out a quote from my mind. This helps to bring a smile to the other person and hopefully stir up some of those wonderful endorphins.


Funny Quotes to Share With Friends

  • Many people die at twenty-five and aren't buried until they are seventy-five. Max Frisch
  • A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. Texas Guinan
  • Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter? Stephen Wright
  • Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children. J. Paul Getty
  • The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my American Express bill. Peter Ustinov
  • Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. Robert Orben
  • The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood-sucking parasites'. Larry Hardiman
  • When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car" Unknown.
  • I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. Zsa Zsa Gabor
  • I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. Rodney Dangerfield
  • I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. Winston Churchill.
  • Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand. Unknown.
  • My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil. Paul Getty.
  • Its been a rough day. I got up this morning .... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom. Rodney Dangerfield.

Conclusion: Benefits of Laughter

I grew up with parents who were famous for finding humor in life's ups and downs. We didn't have much money, and there were times we barely had food on the table, but my folks always managed to remain positive, grateful for what we did have, and were able to find the funny side of life. This has influenced me, for the better, during my own battle with hard times.

Laughter positively affects many aspects of our life, including our health, well-being, and energy, which leads to a healthier and better quality of life.

When we laugh, it causes certain chemical changes to our body. It has been proven that as we laugh, we release enzymes and hormones that are helpful for the normal functioning of various organs. This is due to a connection between laughing and stimulation of the brain and different glands Our immune system also becomes stronger.

In addition, laughter helps relieve stress, depression, anxiety, grief, anger, and irritation. Laughing also decreases pain by releasing a hormone known as endorphins. It improves our attentiveness, pulse and heart rate.

So basically, we look better, feel better, live better and longer when we laugh. My prescription for you - laugh out loud 3 x every day for the rest of your beautiful life.

Baby Twins Laughing

What Makes You Laugh The Most?

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© 2010 Audrey Hunt


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