Something to Feel Guilty About: 10 Movies You're Afraid to Watch in Public
What does the term guilty pleasure truly mean? How does it impact you personally? When people usually think of a so-called guilty pleasure, it's usually something they have to be ashamed to admit that they enjoy in any fashion. Do you like 1980s hair bands or pretty much any of the boy bands that flood the radio waves these days? That's okay, you're not likely the only one who sings along to those songs in the privacy of your car. Just turn up the volume and sing your heart out. Ignore the staring onlookers in the process. You don't need them to cramp your jam fest.
In terms of Hollywood, there are a mountain of guilty pleasures that viewers are embarrassed to admit openly that they like without feeling the scorn of their peers. The key to a good guilty pleasure movie is that you have to enjoy it. That's unfortunately why a lot of Robert Pattinson's non-Twilight movies won't make the cut. A prime example would be 2010's Remember Me, because it was downright depressing from the beginning. It was also the offensive 9/11 related ending that made it worth forgetting. Do you want to know what constitutes a stellar guilty pleasure flick? Read on to see which ten films made the cut to make your own viewing opinions. See if you agree or disagree with the findings and make your own opinions.
Stallone Action/Drama Block
Victory (1981)- During the course of Sylvester Stallone's long career, he had racked up an impressive number of guilty pleasure worthy films (Rocky IV, The Expendables, etc.) that viewers loved to cringe over. What separated Victory from the pack was based on the fact that not even talented costars, such as Michael Caine, or Director John Huston could save this film from being a guilty pleasure. Originally, the script was designed to be a more serious fare that ended on a far more tragic note. That movie would've made a greater impact, but it was transformed into the cheerful cliche where good always won over evil. The story focused on a soccer game between POWs and a group of Nazi players. Caine and Pele seemed to enjoy themselves on-screen without taking things too seriously. Stallone, on the other hand, was completely miscast as Captain Robert Hatch. Instead of being a team player, he seemed like he designed his character to simply be a nuisance to everyone. It was also rumored that he wanted his character to make the game winning goal, even though it would have been a stretch to do story wise. Luckily, that idea was vetoed before it made it into the film. Overall, Victory was still a pleasant film to watch. You just had to ignore Stallone's presence and not take his character too seriously.
The Specialist (1994)- When it came to choosing his film roles, Stallone excelled at playing tough guys who were just misunderstood. He did that in Assassins and with The Specialist. Of course, Stallone finally learned that he shouldn't take himself too seriously because viewers need to laugh as much as they like explosions and car chases. In The Specialist, Stallone played a former government bomb expert who helped a lethal femme fatale (Sharon Stone) with baggage of her own. The movie featured some over the top acting from Eric Roberts and Rod Steiger as mob guys who were in Stallone's cross hairs, but it was James Woods' villain who chewed the most scenery. He yelled and chatted his way through everything. Woods made his character the ultimate over-the-top villain, until he crossed paths with Stallone's character in a confrontation that was worth the price of admission.
Tough Guys Special
Road House (1989)- Here's what you need to know about this classically campy movie that gets constantly airtime on various cable channels. Patrick Swayze played a bouncer named Dalton who went from town to town cleaning up some of the most dangerous bars filled with guys who deserved a beating. The acting was something to be desired and the dialogue was completely laughable at best, but the movie still continued to entertain. Based on its popularity, it even generated a disappointing sequel. The movie's most memorable part was the ending where Swayze confronted Ben Gazzara's ruthless villain who was a homicidal version of Boss Hogg. The movie's conclusion helped to satisfy everyone's lust for revenge and Swayze's Dalton didn't even have to lift a finger to do it. Justice indeed.
Snakes on a Plane (2006)- Okay, this movie was destined to be a guilty pleasure based on the previews alone. The special effects were just plain silly and the acting was pure camp. Viewers were able to laugh non-stop for various reasons, but it was a treat to see Samuel L. Jackson play the ultimate tough guy as he battled some lethal snakes that were put on a plane to kill everyone on board. The plot was limited at best, but viewers shouldn't care about that. If they did, this movie was definitely not for them. Watch Zero Dark Thirty if you're looking for something with more substance.
Ridiculous Romantic Comedies
Paris-When It Sizzles (1964)- Sure, the movie featured William Holden and Audrey Hepburn as lovers destined to be together by the closing credits. They worked together once before in 1954's Sabrina, but this time their chemistry didn't translate on-screen. It was rumored that Holden and Hepburn were once involved off-screen, which could explain why they appeared to be awkward in their scenes together. The story was just a little over-the-top and some of the scenes seemed to be put together randomly to cover up some production problems. Overall, the movie was still enjoyable to watch because it succeeded on charming viewers even when it was at its worst.
Date With An Angel (1987)- This movie's slot on this list can be explained by discussing it's premise. A guy was days away marrying someone he thought that he loved, but he was surprised by an unexpected visit from an angel who changed everything for him. The plot simply defied logic. Why would an angel choose a hapless bachelor to be her soul mate? The movie featured a young Michael E. Knight, better known as Tad Martin on All My Children, as the clueless Jim. He made viewers laugh and relate to him as he was thrown into a bizarre situation. Emmanuelle Beart played the angel who changed his life and Phoebe Cates was Jim's soon-to-be wife. Cates' Patty was the ultimate mean girl who got everything that was coming to her in the end. She played the character up for laughs, intentionally or otherwise. Despite it's silly plot, the movie was still a pleasure to watch even when it was at its craziest.
Just Plain Bad
Xanadu (1980)- Unfortunately, this movie will only be remember for some of Olivia Newton-John's most memorable 80s songs. The plot was ridiculous and the special effects were done by a first grader, but the movie's tone almost made viewers forgive those offenses. It was a joy to see Gene Kelly in his last major film role, but the material should've been worthy of such a talented actor. He had a few unforgettable song and dance numbers, such as the one he did with Newton-John early in the movie, that showed he could still keep up with the best of them. Sadly, his presence alone didn't save the film was being on this list.
Jaws 3-D(1983)- Two words can be used to describe this film: pointless sequel. Not even 3D special effects could save this unnecessary sequel that should've never been made. It should only be seen by fans and people looking to take a risk.
Denise Richards' Finest Bad Girls
Wild Things (1998)- When it came choosing roles, Richards was better suited playing the mean rich girl who ended up getting punished for her sins. It was hard to take her seriously in any other role. In Wild Things, her character was part of a scheme to con her rich mother out of millions. The movie was destined to be a pot boiler of a thriller with a lot of plot twists, which it was never in short supply off. Viewers were just eager to see the overly hyped threesome between Richards, Neve Campbell and Matt Dillon. The movie's success spawned two straight to video sequels, but the original was still the best.
Valentine (2001)- In this campy horror film, Richards played another rich mean girl who went too far and ticked off the wrong serial killer. When she became a casualty of her own making, Richards tried to allow her character to put up a fight, but viewers simply wanted to see her suffer. They definitely won't be disappointed in that regard.
In the end, a good guilty pleasure just has to be something that you enjoy watching no matter how much it makes you cringe by the closing credits. Okay, Mannequin may have been a stretch, but it was the perfect way to cure the weekend blues. (It was also definitely a lot more enjoyable than the dreadful sequel that won't be named.) Don't allow your friends or family to dictate what movies you should watch or avoid like the plague. Make your own judgments at your own viewing peril. Watch the original Red Dawn because it embraced everything from the 80s and avoid the recently failed remake. It's better to pretend that the movie was never remade. Most moviegoers already have. Remember that it's perfectly acceptable to watch a good movie, even if you're the only one that likes it. That's okay because you don't have to share the popcorn or remote with anyone for the time being.