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The Charmin Toilet Paper Commercials With Bears: If A Bear Goes In Woods…?
There are many commercials that irritate me on television these days, but the mother of all of them is the Charmin toilet paper commercials with the animated bears. I know that I am pondering what kind of toilet paper, or any other product for that matter, that I think to myself What would a bear do?
Over the years they have become more and more graphic. In the beginning, the bear would do his business behind a tree and either have a successful movement, because of the stellar toilet paper, or an unsuccessful one, because of substandard toilet paper. Those marketing geniuses at Charmin thought THIS was just not powerful enough to show the excellence of the toilet paper. At least at this point, the bear was in the woods where he belongs.
The bears have now moved into a suburban home. The latest bear shenanigans now include a bear on a stack of pillows, realizing suddenly that he has to use the bathroom. Even worse, the young bear stumbles out of the bathroom with pieces of toilet paper stuck to his behind. Really? A bear that lives in a house, that plays videogames, and that has a working plumbing system is the best Charmin could muster up? I want to see these bears waltz into the local market and ask the clerk, “Which toilet paper won’t stick to my bum after I poo?”
What’s even more infuriating is that I only buy Charmin. It has nothing to do with the bears though. Just call me old-fashioned, but I don’t think I want to hear about the bowel movements of bears, or anyone else, on a commercial. They might as well have a human boy in the commercial…but we all know that would just be crude and vulgar. But a bare bear butt? Completely acceptable.
The open-ended old saying “If I bear goes in the woods…” has now been firmly answered with “…he will only wipe with Charmin.”