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Updated on July 30, 2012

Mommy and babies

Double Tragedy: One Mom's pain


“Come to the edge.”
“We can't. We're afraid.”
“Come to the edge.”
“We can't. We will fall!”
“Come to the edge.”
And they came.
And he pushed them.
And they flew.

Guillaume Apollinaire, 1880-1918

No one knows what it is like to lose a child unless you lost a child, this I know. I have seen how it is affected people first hand, for the life of me I just didn't get it. That is until, I lost my own daughter while pregnant. That I would never wish for anyone to experience, the pain is on going. You learn to live with facts despite the grief and pain. My heart sank as I read that one of the victims of the Aurora Movie Massacre had not only lost her six year old (two years older than my Maria), but as of yesterday she miscarried the baby she was carrying due to the injuries she sustained during the attack (she was shot in the neck and abdomen).

I could not help, but think, what a monster? My heart sobbed for her, this complete stranger. I know the pain I felt was horrible, when I lost my child, but I had to push forward for Maria. This I must say before I go any further, the worst thing you can say to a mother that has lost her child is, "You still got ______ to take care of.

At least you got other kids. You are young, you can have more kids, etc." This only causes anger and resentment, because in her eyes (maybe some feel different, but for me this was the case and a lot of women I have spoken to in the situation agree.) it does not matter how many kids she has, no one can replace the child that she lost.

Then, to add insult to injury she is also most likely going to be paralyzed, because of the injuries sustained during the shooting. Why James? Why? I look at this innocent little baby girl eating her ice cream. I see this beautiful young woman with her whole life ahead of her and now the doctors are hoping that she regain the use of her arms again. I even think of the baby that could of been and I wonder why?

The only word we have heard him utter was yes, when the judge asked him about wavering his right for a preliminary hearing. Even more sorrow at the fact he will not be charged for the death of the unborn child, because he can only be charged for those deaths of people that were alive or born on the night of the shooting. Which raises the question, when does birth began in gestation or during the day you are born. If it begins during gestation, then the unborn baby should be added to the number of deaths that resulted from the massacre.

If you consider abortion murder, has he not murdered her baby by pointing that gun towards her abdomen? Ashley's aunt was present at his last court date and described him as a, "persona of evilness." Do you disagree? How does a juror or judge turn a blind eye to this, because of a legal technicality? Meanwhile, Ashley lays paralyzed, knowing her six year is dead, and now has lost her 8wk gestation unborn child. The world she once knew that included her smiling six year old and the hope she had for herself and her unborn baby went up in smoke with the dreams of many other movie goers.

They did not go to the theatre looking for a fight, they went to see a movie premiere. Some of them, that was the last thing they ever did. We can not erase the horror of that night for any of them. It has been described as the worst massacre in American history, it is not to be taken lightly. I apologize for my tone, I can not imagine Ashley's struggle, before this article takes on a tyrannical tone, I will digress and say, "Let us keep Ashley, her family, her friends, and fellow movie going victims and their community in our prayers, our thoughts, and our well wishes." God Bless you Ashley and your beautiful babies, for none is closer to a Mommy than her babies.

Dedication to a Mommy and her babies: A Mother's Hope

Video Dedication 2

What do you think?

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    • brittvan22 profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      @albion, aww very sweet sentiments to the victims, thanks for sharing.

    • old albion profile image

      Graham Lee 

      6 years ago from Lancashire. England.

      This is a terrible tragedy for Ashley and her family, also the other families who have been involved in this terrible affair.

      Ashley, her family and all the others will be in my prayers tonight.


    • brittvan22 profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      @Noel autor, I agree it is a very sad incident that shouldn't ever happen the pain is boundless. I am very touched that you took in the article, thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    • brittvan22 profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      @still waters, wow, my aim was to bring her struggle to light, very touching words, thanks for sharing.

    • stillwaters707 profile image


      6 years ago from Texas

      This makes you feel like you're looking into the heart of that mother.

    • brittvan22 profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      @Becky, I understand I did psychology of religion: Pastoral care and counseling in grad school. I will admit I was interested in his motivation as well. His story while interesting has yet to be told and for me, I focused this article on a victim I thought who story should be told. I will admit it was a difficult article to write, she hasn't buried her six year old. Thanks for taking the time to read this article I have written two others on the killer, but I thought it was time to write a victim dedication. Once again thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    • Rfordin profile image


      6 years ago from Florida

      I tend to get all consumed with stories of this nature but I tend to look at the possible motivations of the killers simply because it interests me and my background in psychology has to analyze EVERYTHING.

      This is tragic, a tragic situation that steamed from people simply going to the movie theater. Which in and of it self is a "normal" act. To think it could have happened anywhere and one of my loved could have been innocently watching a movie and have had their life taken to soon. It's a shame.

      I must admit as the story unravles there are a lot of questions unanaswered that I'm afraid will only be answered in his book that he writes (is he writting a book, not sure...will he or his defense attorney probably).

      I have yet to read about the individual victims simply because that personalizes it and that is not something I choose to do to myself. This is the first victims story I have read and to be quite honest it's so heart wrenching it will probably be the last. My heart goes out to all those who lost their loved ones or who were "lucky" enough to make it out of the movie theater alive that night, although their scares are just as deep.


    • brittvan22 profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      I agree Patty, thanks for sharing your thoughts!

    • Patty Kenyon profile image

      Patty Kenyon 

      6 years ago from Ledyard, Connecticut

      My heart truly goes out to those that have lost loved ones and those that have lost loved ones due to senseless killings.


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