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Tim Gunn Questions If Being Single Is Being Selfish
Tim Gunn raises an interesting point on the June 8 episode of television's The Revolution.
The episode examines single life in terms of health, home, fashion and more aspects of the lifestyle. Tim Gunn, fashion expert on the television show and co-host from Project Runway, says he is told by other people in his life that being single is being selfish.
Tim Gunn says on the television episode that he does not agree with this statement.
To say that being single is being selfish supports the belief that people who are not in a relationship are doing things only for themselves. There are many holes to this argument.
For example, single people can be very giving to their friends and family without being in an intimate relationship. A person who is giving is not selfish in this regard.
Fellow host to Tim Gunn on The Revolution is fitness trainer Harley Pasternak. During the television episode, Pasternak says to Gunn that he IS being selfish in that he is not sharing himself with someone else. Pasternak further explains that someone is missing out on being with Tim Gunn as Gunn chooses to be alone. In that sense, he is selfish as he does not let someone else be with him.
A Relationship Just Around the Bend
Tim Gunn says on the television episode that he has been on his own for 30 years. He says single people should "hold their head up high" and be proud of who they are.
He also says that people do not know what is just "around the bend". Here is another argument against the view that a person who is not in a relationship is selfish. Becoming involved in an intimate relationship is not always a planned out venture. Indeed, many people say that they found partners when they were not actively looking to find someone. If this is true, then how can being single be equated with thinking only about one's own needs? According to this argument, a person is alone because he or she has not yet randomly stumbled upon someone that takes them to a relationship status.
Single As a Form of Self-Care
Being single can also be viewed as a form of care rather than a form of selfishness.
People who are not married or common-law are able to take care of their own needs first and the responsibilities that they alone carry. In relationships, women may take care of their partners but neglect their own needs. These needs become second to their partners' demands. The same situation can hold true for men. In these situations, being in a relationship is tied to lower levels of self-care.
In a solitary lifestyle, there is often more time to care for one's own needs. Selfishness does occur in the sense that personal activities are attended to. On the other hand, doesn't the single person deserve to love himself/herself? Being kind to one's own mind and body is very important!
Care and Lifestyle
While some people view being single as being selfish, other people view being alone as a great time to take care of themselves, both mentally and physically. There is nothing wrong with choosing to be alone rather than being in a relationship. This statement holds especially true if that relationship is an unhealthy one for at least one of the partners. In the words of Tim Gunn, "hold your head up high" in the single world and examine your own needs before heading into a relationship.
Questions for You
Do You Think Selfishness Is Implied For People Who Are Single?
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