Quotes from True Genius: Frank Zappa
A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.
Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.
Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something, uses that something to support their own existence.
I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
I searched for years I found no love. I'm sure that love will never be a product of plasticity.
If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
It isn't necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice. There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.
Most people wouldn't know music if it came up and bit them on the ass.
Most rock journalism is people who can't write, interviewing people who can't talk, for people who can't read.
Music is always a commentary on society.
Music, in performance, is a type of sculpture. The air in the performance is sculpted into something.
No change in musical style will survive unless it is accompanied by a change in clothing style. Rock is to dress up to.
One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agree with you. You do not change people's minds.
Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.
Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.
The computer can't tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what's missing is the eyebrows.
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.
There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we'd all love one another.
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.
Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.
You can't always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.
The whole Universe is a large joke. Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke. So why take anything too serious?
Whatever you have to do to have a good time, let's get on with it, so long as it doesn't cause a murder.
So long as somebody gets a laugh out of it, what the f***?
The crux of the biscuit is: If it entertains you, fine. Enjoy it. If it doesn't, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that's a bonus.
If you wind up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest or some guy on TV telling you how to do your shit, then YOU DESERVE IT
You've got to be digging it while it's happening 'cause it just might be a one shot deal.
Anyone who is disturbed by the idea of newts in a nightclub is potentially dangerous.
May your shit come to life and kiss you on the face.
Information doesn't kill you.
There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.
The establishment of a rating system, voluntary or otherwise, opens the door to an endless parade of moral quality control programs based on things certain Christians do not like. What if the next bunch of Washington wives demands a large yellow "J" on all material written or performed by Jews, in order to save helpless children from exposure to concealed Zionist doctrine?
Bad facts make bad law, and people who write bad laws are in my opinion more dangerous than songwriters who celebrate sexuality.
I wrote a song about dental floss but did anyone's teeth get cleaner?
Scientology, how about that? You hold on to the tin cans and then this guy asks you a bunch of questions, and if you pay enough money you get to join the master race. How's that for a religion?
Let's not be too tough on our own ignorance. It's the thing that makes America great. If America weren't incomparably ignorant, how could we have tolerated the last eight years?
People make a lot of fuss about my kids having such supposedly 'strange names', but the fact is that no matter what first names I might have given them, it is the last name that is going to get them in trouble.
Consider for a moment any beauty in the name Ralph.
If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they'll gonna murder you in your sleep.
I think you should leave it up to the parent, because not all parents want to keep their children totally ignorant.
Yeah, I tell them to change the channel if they see some guy in a brown suit with a telephone number at the bottom of the screen asking for money.
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
Children are naïve -- they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you're asking for trouble.
Remember there's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
There is no hell. There is only France.