What It's Like Being The "Mom" Of The Group
I'd heard it since my sophomore year of high school: "lol thanks mom". Usually preceded by the delivery of some tough love to a friend who was contemplating making a choice I had deemed irresponsible or not beneficial to her future or reputation. I was the "mom" of my friend group in high school, still am as I enter my 3rd year of undergrad, and plan to be until I'm actually a mom (like, the kind with children).
I was the girl who would strongly censor my social media accounts so that if by any chance a future employer were to stalk back 312 weeks on my Instagram he wouldn't find out that I had worn a crop-top to a concert, or had a four loko in a sketchy basement while rocking out to house music. Granted, opportunities for me to even take such pictures were rare as I was always the sober friend making sure everyone else survived the night (we needed at least one reliable memory in the morning right??). But God forbid I take part in these normal, teenager activities, no one would dare find out via the internet.
I was smart. I was driven. I knew what I wanted and I intended to get it. Some might say "overachiever" I say "ambitious". It's hard to fit in with other teens though, when you're 14 and already know that you'll be attending an Ivy League to pursue your PhD in Biomedical Engineering while your friends are deciding between whether they want to be a waitress or lifeguard for the upcoming summer. They don't even have their weekends planned, and you know where you're retiring. It's a different world, but I love(d) every minute of it.
I liked being the one to get everyone else in order. I liked having that odd sense of authority and leadership. I found "mom" to become a compliment and I embraced it like no other. I didn't mind holding back friends' hair when they had one too many vodka sodas, or helping them create resumes, or babysitting every weekend, or doing taxes, or cooking or cleaning or any of it. I thrived off of helping people better themselves and my "mom" role was the perfect way for me to do that.
Boys didn't see me as the girlfriend in high school, or the fun hookup in college - but they did see me as wife material. Nobody thought I would be fun at the parties - but they appreciated it when I kept them from being caught by the cops or jumping off the balcony. I didn't have much free time - but people trusted me with their children and I made $15/hour when I was 15 years old.
You may think the "mom" in your friend group has it rough, and that she never gets to have fun...but what you simply can't comprehend is that "mom-ing" her days away IS her kind of fun. She enjoys it, and your whole squad benefits from it. Just be sure to send your friend-mom a thanks every now and then, God knows she deserves it after putting up with you. xoxo, C.