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Zombie Survival: How To Kill A Zombie

Updated on October 11, 2011

Zombie Kill Guide

 Zombies are them troublesome dead walkers that just get in the way of a good night out, they either want to eat your brains or have a quick nibble on your nuts, they are usually slow creatures that are easy to outrun, but in high numbers and in confined spaces they can be fatal, this is a guide of sorts on how to kill a zombie, it is common sense people so in the event of a zombie holocaust it is advisable that you take the necessary precautions against these undead deadites.

First and foremost, when you shoot a gun try to aim for the head shot, because in too many films have I seen some rather dumb people just waste valuable ammo shooting the zombies shoulders and chest, one head shot seems to do it and if you can't shoot straight, it's best to go to a shooting range to practice your gun skills, because if you don't you will probably be that bad at shooting a gun, you will pop a cap in some poor bastards arse who may not be a zombie and that would be bad.

Sharpen them machetis up, so that when the time comes you can have yourselves a zombie decapitation spree in the local shopping mall whilst doing the shopping, could be a bit of entertainment, as severing the head from the body is also a way to go for killing a zombie, the brain seems to be the main force driving these deadly rotting creatures.

Other ways you may not have thought of:

Liquid nitrogen could be a good alternative when thrown on the head, be careful not to get any of it on your hands and genitals as they will be as cold as a snowmans balls, liquid nitrogen may not be a common substance so a bit of carefully controlled fire in a confined room could do the trick, as always though aim for the head, try and destroy that brain as they are really quite thick anyway - don't let Bub fool you by flicking through a book and loading a gun like in the original Day Of The Dead.

Knives and other stabbing weapons, aim for the brain, you could get to it through the eyes, the nose or the mouth or even the ears.

Warning If the zombies are the fast running kind that is actually quite disrepectful to classic zombies, then you may get eaten, so stock up on guns to take them all down with a head shot, you may want to do this sniper style from the roof of a building, particularly if you want to gain access to a casino or cinema for a little entertainment and popcorn.

Household Furniture and other stuff - Around the house there may be just the thing for killing a zombie right under your nose, so prepare in advance, a chair for instance can be broken and made into a weapon to fend of those dirty zombie ho's, or a glass vase smashed over the head may just dig in the zombies brain and make them die....yeahhh kill the zombies!!

There may be other inventive ways to kill zombies with grenades or by lighting your own farts on them, but whatever you choose, make it count, before they over run the world and form political parties of their own and run for president and prime minister of all countries and they make us pay taxes and make us watch reality TV....oh no I've just realized it's worse than I thought, they are already here....reality TV is at an all time high...we will become zombies soon....noooooooooooooooo!

Zombie Killing

How To Kill A Zombie Drawing by Wayne Tully
How To Kill A Zombie Drawing by Wayne Tully

More Ways To Kill A Zombie

Zombies are horrible undead creatures and they should be punished for being so ugly looking, so with a few mentions in the comments below I am able to update this helpful guide on Zombie Killing and first things first go and buy a Chainsaw on Amazon below to really get the best killing tool for these zombie rotters.

Chainsaws are ideal for chopping the zombies head off, but be careful to have enough petrol in your chainsaw as running out of it just as an army of zombies are heading towards you is not a good sign....

Check out the chainsaws below and pick a good one....

Chainsaws To Decapitate Zombies Heads

Read A Well Thought Out Book....

 A good book that I read awhile ago that sticks in my mind is this one which I reviewed World War Z which is a fictitious account of a zombie apocalypse and it gives a good account of what could happen and through this book you can work out what to do to survive when the zombies spread over the world.

Knowledge is power when it comes to zombies, so prepare with as much tactical information you can acquire by reading articles like this and books on the subject of zombie survival, it's not who you know it's what you know!

World War Z - A Great Book About A Fictional Account Of A Zombie War That First Broke Out In China Available On Amazon

How Would You Kill Zombies?

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    • profile image

      ray 4 years ago

      to kill a zombie u would have to destroy a major a part like the head if you shoot it in the chest enough time it will fall and stay down for a while but it will still be a live

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 4 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      no I am not smarter than you....at least you have the commenting power......

    • profile image

      spadkins 4 years ago

      Yeah, cause you're smarter than Roger Ma, Max Brooks, and Matt Mogk? Or even me, for that matter?

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 4 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      lol.....what a pile of shite!

    • profile image

      spadkins 4 years ago

      I'm sorry to break it to you guys, but this article is so low-quality with so much missing information, not even to mention the fact that it's hard to understand because of there being only 11 sentences in a page long article...

      So I am going to write down a few of the things I would have changed about this article.

      Chainsaws, for one, are crap weapons in the zombie apocalypse. Not only are they loud, attracting more zombies and drowning out orders or information your team, but they are heavy, clumsy, and they have a finite amount of fuel. And, most importantly, zombie blood splatters everywhere, including on you. One drop of their blood in your eye, your mouth, any open wounds, and you're infected yourself in around 24 hours.

      Also, decapitating a zombie does not kill them in the least. Sure, they are 90% less dangerous than when they had bodies, but all decapitating really does is leave a zombie head rolling around trying to bite your ankles.

      A "controlled fire" INSIDE a building during the zombie apocalypse is in and of itself an oxymoron. You cannot control a fire in a flammable structure. End of story.

      The fast running "type/breed" of zombies is not another "type/breed" of zombies, just as there are not "classic zombies". There are real zombies, and there are fictional zombies. And all zombies can run. It's only a matter of how fit they where in life, how old they were as humans, how old they are as zombies, and whether their legs are still functional or not.

      There is around a .5% chance of killing a zombie by smashing a vase over their head. It would be more effective to jam a shard of said vase through their eye.

      And the last paragraph is just plain stupid.

      By the way, in case you don't believe what I'm saying, I am simply quoting other 1%er zombie experts such as Max Brooks and Matt Mogk.

    • profile image

      sabrina 4 years ago

      I have a real ZOMBIE squade i have seen,heard and killed thousand's of real ZOMBIES.

    • carrie Lee Night profile image

      Kept private 4 years ago from Northeast United States

      Interesting article :)

    • Phamtastic profile image

      Phamtastic 4 years ago from Florida

      Awesome article. Just recently published a How to make your own zombie survival kit.

    • profile image

      jman 4 years ago

      i get a ak 47 flame thower and a uzi

    • profile image

      mefajf07300302 5 years ago

      LOVE this hub! I will now know how to kill them upcoming zombies!! Though I think I've watched enough zombie movies to know what NOT to do! Sharing your hub!!

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      gotta olive zombies lol!

    • profile image

      People 5 years ago

      I olive zombies

    • profile image

      isaac 5 years ago

      I like Zomies!!!

    • profile image

      zombie101 5 years ago

      we zombies are a peaceful beings the only reason we try to to eat you is cause(1)if we went shopping you would all be afraid of us and kill us in the store when we tried to buy something to eat(2)when we do eat anything else we end up throwing it back up and finally(3)your brains taste really good

      p.s bbbbrrrrraaaaaiiiiinnnnssss

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      ????. its called secret services

    • profile image

      ???? 5 years ago

      What do you mean zombies there are not real i mean nothing at night but where could zombies be? give me locations where and ill check with a cam. ill give credits to you

    • profile image

      cole mclean 5 years ago

      war wod you go to servive a zombie apoculips

    • experience days profile image

      Sarah Firmin 5 years ago from England, UK

      Useful information here. Especially in Hull!

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      hey new zombie plan. aa 12 shotgun dragons breath shells in it

    • profile image

      zomsuck 5 years ago

      zobies aint real if dey wer u'd use 115 ray and thunder

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      You'd still get eaten though lol!

    • profile image

      Brandowilson 5 years ago

      I would just shoot myself in the temple so i wont get bit and feel so much pain. This is a good idea cause a whole horde coming your way , pull out a pistol aim, and (boom) your not eaten.

    • profile image

      Dispatch Unit 7 5 years ago

      Zombies were once human too, show them the mercy you'd show a lame horse. Shoot it in the head to end it's suffering. Yeah it's gonna be fun, but it's the Humane thing to do... Wipe em all out, and may God Have Mercy On their souls. LMAO

    • zombiesurvival profile image

      zombiesurvival 5 years ago from St Louis

      Great stuff! Appears we have a common interest... :)

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      plus dude us werewolves would have your back on full moon's so yeah have to watch out for some werewolves cause they will probably attack you so be prepared when this day comes

    • profile image

      charity 5 years ago

      I think this game is so stupid cause i didn't play it so it's boring

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      okay here are tips. double tap. know your way out when in doubt and have lots and lots of ammo

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      plus screw guns fight fist cause melee is more effective. plus @waynet. no offense but have u even thought about berserker zombies

    • profile image

      zombiekiller 5 years ago

      i would get an ak 47 and a desert eagle or a baseball to swing their head off and make a home runn.............. or just piss on their eyes it burns........hahaahah zombies arent real guys but i wish their was..

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      ... just shoot a zombie with a spas 12 with slug shells so when ur in the trapped situation u can spray with the spas 12

    • wolf person profile image

      wolf person 5 years ago

      ... just shoot a zombie with spas 12 slug shells then the zombie is dead remember head and chest is where u would shoot a zombie

    • profile image

      the huntsman 5 years ago

      OK everyone listen to me. Zombies are just humans who have been subject to a virus that kills the brain then restarts it's basic motor functions. this virus uses the human body to feed itself and give it energy. to kill a zombie simply destroy the brain stem and cut off motor function. the virus will simply die. and when trying to slip past zombie hordes chop up zombie guts and act like a zombie. zombies sense you through sight,smell,and sound. so walk slowly, put zombie guts all over yourself, and try to avoid attention.remember to familiarize yourself with throwing knives and all of your basic crossbows,longbows,and other such long range weapons with REUSABLE ammo. If a zombie invasion does happen I will be in a place where the sun never sets. if you want to become part of the re birthing of the human race come find me. I will e waiting

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes blunt objects could dispatch those Zombies much quicker...a couple of hours a day doing this and you'll pile up the bodies of Zombies.

    • profile image

      Michael 5 years ago

      Well, in a real life situation, a zombie randomnly breaks through your front door and you still sitting on the couch horrified. Best thing to do: Run in the kitchen and get a friggin' frying pan or something that is blunt to you can easily kill it with one swipe to the head. I never liked Machettes they take to much out of you to be honest, only rely on knives and sharp objects if the zombie has you pinned down trying to bite you, or you can rely on your strength if you are blessed. Best way to kill a zombie up close? Blunt weapons. Knives are back ups. Guns are a so and so for me, I don't want all the zombies in the world coming to the noise of the gun, so guns are emergency uses: Blunt weapons are you primary, guns are your secondary, knives and sharp objects are you worst case senario weaps.

    • profile image

      Alex 5 years ago

      But if I would invent a anti-zombie-virus, how long time would it take before one of the zombies is dead?

    • profile image

      zombies 5 years ago

      i'm walker go away form meeeeee

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      There should be zombie animals as it just aint fair!

    • Swetankraj profile image

      Swetank Raj 5 years ago from India

      Now a zombie attack i should get ready with my weapons! -hahaha really nice hub made me laugh halfe on the way. Zombies are attacking.......runn.....!

    • profile image

      zombie destroyer 5 years ago

      i would get guns heaps i mean heaps of ammo for it than i would get an armored veircle like a tank or something and supplies and drive as for as far away i can than stay in the country for safty oh and is there such thing as zombie animal please tell me and save survivers as well

    • profile image

      naya 5 years ago

      Wow i may kill a zombe now

    • Deborah Demander profile image

      Deborah Demander 5 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

      Friday the 13th is coming three times this year. Beware the zombie apocalypse. Get your ammo now!

      Namaste.

    • profile image

      dead man 5 years ago

      oh wow my zombie neighbor was just on my computer i think hes dead now what should i do if hes not dead ahhhhhhhhhhhhelp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

    • profile image

      dead man 5 years ago

      we zombies have fellings we just cooe to not use them you should consider us a firend if you have a problem with zomies cuz our faces or how we rose from the grave withflesh peeling from our faces hen u should look at urselves in the morning trust e we never sleep and oe time when i was in this one guys house trying ot get a snack he lookedso ugly that i spit himback out when i really thought about how he lookd when i ate him while he was sleeping

      p.s i like brain jiuce with my macoroni n cheee

    • profile image

      sgt.Jordan 5 years ago

      don't forget about bows and arrows cross bows work better .... the ammo is reusable so if u stick a zombie pick your arrow back up

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Lol.....Yes them Government types always up to no good!

      We might as well blame the Government on everything!

      Down with the Zombies!!!!!!!

    • profile image

      John Red rod 5 years ago

      Zombies are Alive the government has them held underground that's how the outbreak will begin. then soon the zombies will evolve into quicker stealthier things its just a matter of time before someone slips up.

    • profile image

      choclate thunder 5 years ago

      hey does a thirteen year old girl want to go out with me

    • profile image

      Shadow Assassin 5 years ago

      If you're in a Juggernaught suit and in a tank would that keep you safe or if your just in a juggernaut suit would they still be able to kill you???

    • profile image

      Makeeyo 5 years ago

      What do you thers a zombie called a tank

    • profile image

      luis jurado 5 years ago

      i want to kill a zombie where do i go show me amap

    • profile image

      james m brown 5 years ago

      In the Nam, I shot plenty of zombies, you head shot them. Nowadays, these politicians we have can take a head shot and keep coming back stupid. Nukes might be the only way?

    • profile image

      matt 5 years ago

      i woud use something quiet but painfull

    • profile image

      cal 5 years ago

      is zombie flesh weak

    • profile image

      black and yellow (SONG) 5 years ago

      i made a book about zombies with 372 pages and i maite make it into a proper book and show yous and also publish it b the way i am only 8

    • profile image

      Noah 5 years ago

      Wow I would use a pistie

    • profile image

      Noah 5 years ago

      Awesome I would use a pistil

    • profile image

      xynga 5 years ago

      I would run around it and use a machete to slash at its legs until successfully crippled then pour some lighter fluid as the zombie crawls toward me. I light a match and drop it near its head where I concentrated the lighter fluid. Eventually the fire will burn through the skull and kill the zombie.

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Nice one! I'd go with the Molotov!

    • profile image

      DO YOU CARE 5 years ago

      I would say to chain them up and then bring them to my fireplace then get some kind of powerful fan and light them on fire either that or run them over with my lawn mower or chop them up with a weed whacker or get in my car and run them over with blood on the windshield

      or a Molotov

      Hooray!!!!!

    • profile image

      michel 5 years ago

      you can use a baseball bat to crack there heads

    • profile image

      logan 5 years ago

      Hey, don't burn 'em! The viral type zombies(disease or virus has reanimated them) will just get stronger, and the last thing you want is a flaming Spider(mutated zombie)

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      What if? what if? hells bells what if? ..........just shoot them!

    • profile image

      Rose 5 years ago

      How could you kill a zombie with a head-shot even know they really have a brain...Like on Black Ops 1st leval you just have to get a head shot then on many other levels its harder? What if it is harder in real life? They could run without a head....

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Then haul out the Barbecue!

    • profile image

      bre 5 years ago

      what if we have to eat zombies!!!!!!!!!?????

    • profile image

      ur mum 5 years ago

      Luke Skywalker, I choose you!!!

      I would hold a lightsaber, and spin around holding it in front of me. Or get a self charging generator, hook it up to a roundabout to make it spin and strap myself into the middle.

    • profile image

      yous all know 5 years ago

      kickass 124563 you are so foolish go eat some brains you don't even know how to kill a zombie oh this page is on how to kill a zombie

    • profile image

      kickass124563 5 years ago

      they are so esay to kill love to eat them

    • angeladale2 profile image

      Angela Dale 5 years ago from Columbus, Ohio

      thanks for the info we all just might need this one day!

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 5 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      That would be an ideal weapon as it wouldn't run out of bullets and you can quickly jab them through the brain and kill the zombies at a distance...ideally the Walking Dead comic book explains this method of killing a horde of Zombies through a large metal fence with gaps to poke the stick at the Zombies with a knife on the end.

    • Bladehero22 profile image

      Bladehero22 5 years ago

      Yo, waynet. If you could use any weapon against the zombies, what would it be? Mine would be a metal pole covered with blue duct tape. I could use some tools from my garage and duct tape to attach them to the pole and remove the tape when I want to change the desired weapon. And I'll have plenty of duct tape and tools at my disposal. They will probably be hardware tools, gardening tools, or maybe nail guns I could use too. And I'll even use rocks for throwing at them. What about you?

    • profile image

      David 5 years ago

      Well, her is a small list of weapons i have listed along with my emergency plan: Curtain rod, Spatula, Candle holder, Butcher knife, Rolling pin, Hatchet, Hammer, Pipe wrench, Baseball bat, Ice chipper, Saw blade frisby, Firearms(of course), some sort of wire as a last resort for decapitation, Sword( place to get one, mueseum, Rich family, Rich neighbors...), Machete, Crowbar, and a frying pan. Hope this helps you prepare for your zombie apoc!

    • profile image

      L Lawliet 5 years ago

      1. 95% of zombies can be killed by decapitation, so aim your improvised, desperate weapon for it's head and neck.

      2. Do not slip up! Somebody WILL get killed and the next person to see them will think "Oh. That's my friend. I'll just turn my back on him and OH GOODNESS WHY IS HE EATING MY BRAIN!"

      3. Do NOT set them on fire! The only thing worse than undead hordes trying to eat your brains are undead hordes trying to eat your brains WHILE on fire!

      EMERGENCY SUPPLIES:

      FOOD

      WATER

      GUN

      AMMO

      A HECK OF A LOT OF AMMO!

      Congratulations. You are now educated in the way of zombie hunting. Any questions? And remember not to die!

    • profile image

      kkdoom 5 years ago

      i have seen a "zombie" and there normal people

      if zombies are people who have died and come back to life

      theres quite a few of them

    • profile image

      ben 6 years ago

      If you want to kill a zombie just shoot it in the head twice because the number 1 rule is double shot.

    • profile image

      super fat man 6 years ago

      WHY BURN EM. they can't feel it what would it do except burn the flesh and it wont burn through the skull and sever the brain so there is no point.

      but.... if i were to kill a zombie i would just use a very heavy wieght and a very large drop!!!!

    • profile image

      Me 6 years ago

      Lol with a gun it's like cod black ops

    • Bladehero22 profile image

      Bladehero22 6 years ago

      You just have to hit them in the head? I got a metal broomstick covered with blue duct tape. I can probably use it to hit plenty of them in their heads. Course I have hammers and knives so I can use them too. But I'd mostly rely on the broomstick.

    • profile image

      caitlyn 6 years ago

      this is so gay anyone that is smart would know that zombies are not real!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • mcrawford76 profile image

      Matthew I Crawford 6 years ago from Greeley, Colorado

      Very entertaining hub. And by the way, World War Z was absolutely one of the best books i've ever read.

    • profile image

      joe 6 years ago

      a crowbar and a cheese grater would make the best zombie fighting tool.

      but i think that Thor's Mini gun would be boss

      (Thor's mini gun is like Thor's hammer except that it has infinite Tracer rounds, it shoots 50000 rounds a minute!!)

      THHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

      HA HA HA

      Zombie killing is fun with Thor's MiniGun!!

      Fnord!

    • profile image

      fdddddddddasbdfb 6 years ago

      i would get a trained zombie and make it eat other zombies

    • profile image

      bob 6 years ago

      i have every weapeon in the world so i will teach those zombies a lesson oh gosh a zombie stupid morons get loaded the zombie invasishon has started it amost ate me people every zombie created is in this brain eating group i live in alberta call the fbi or come here and help......................we have killed your friend he is now one of us and we are loaded perpare to die.bbbbbbbbrrrrrrrraaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnsssssss

    • lorddraven2000 profile image

      Sam Little 6 years ago from Wheelwright KY

      very entertaining. I think I would opt for a sword and a gun myself but than again who couldn't have some fun with a grenade or two?

    • profile image

      whatever 6 years ago

      yea, a headshot always works, but what if you shot it in the heart? if you are stuck with a semi-auto and 20 zombies, you don't have time to aim every time.

    • profile image

      slayem all 6 years ago

      u know u could use a molotov and a baseball bat or a motorbike or a car but chainsaw no 2 heavy i think the best way 2 survie the zombie apocalips is 2 stay at a milatary base or a gun shop

    • profile image

      Michael  6 years ago

      lots of different ways to kill a zombie and some realply useful , i would try a toy hellicopter to distract the zombie and try make it dizzy , the go full speed into its head to knock it out !! that's my idea lol but these idea's arre good to .

    • profile image

      starctraft 6 years ago

      get all supplies and a gun....that's way zombie will hard to kill us..if they were so many..

    • profile image

      belphegor 6 years ago

      hi my name is belphegor but people just say bael you may not believe me but im the 5th prince of hell the one who controls the sin vanity and sloth and i would just like to say i love the hubpage and i don't love to many things

    • profile image

      drunkpeopll 6 years ago

      thx when we get taken over i know what to do

    • profile image

      The undead 6 years ago

      How to kill a zombie well it would depend is it The Apocalyps or joust a small group are they the military kind or the run of the mill cuz each question gives a different answer think about it is it fast and smart like those in asian movies wich are like superman on steroids or slow and Dumm but in any case I would prefer a state of the art military super tank and a group of highly trained people

    • Granny's House profile image

      Granny's House 6 years ago from Older and Hopefully Wiser Time

      Great hub. I enjoyed reading it

    • profile image

      Al 6 years ago

      Diving chainmail, armoured vehicle, a bunch of guns and ammo, some machetes, and a lighter and hairspray. Also travelling with friends is a good idea :)

    • profile image

      Zombie Expert 6 years ago

      I must agree with all who dislike the chainsaw, one because they are ridiculously heavy,and two because they are ridiculously noisy. I would stick with my hand pump ten round shotgun if im facing under twenty zombies because im a crack shot. but if im facing more than twenty id have to go with a SCAR. Best wishes for the apocolypse,

      Zombie Expert Wayne Marcitello

    • DarkDisOrder profile image

      DarkDisOrder 6 years ago from B.A.D. (Beyond All Dimensions)

      Thinking...... What would i use to kill a zombie, hhmmmmm, a flamethrower seems good and some grenades, C4, acid. I would make a zombie trap since it would be the end of the world and people are dieing all around me anyway, I'll just find some people I really didn't like and befriend them, act like we're really cool and tell them I now a safe place and use these fools as bait, LMFAO!!!!!

    • What's News profile image

      What's News 6 years ago

      Some funny stuff here dude. Great hub.

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 6 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Oh, they are real, in fact just last week I had to fend off the undead hordes who smelled my beefy armpits, all I had in the house was a rusty screwdriver to poke in their heads.....

    • profile image

      Nadia 6 years ago

      um I actually heard dat zombies are real. but i dnt kno to believe it or not. great advice on killing zombies anyway. :)

    • profile image

      OhhhhYes!!!Zombies 6 years ago

      When You Put It That Way I Have Got To Agree With Ben But I Would Definitely Visit A Local Hardware Store. Or Just A Walmart or a Mall Would Definitely Help Too!

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Swords like katanas would work well on a few zombies, but just imagine be-heading a whole army of them, you'd eventually be ripped to pieces and then watch your intestines snapping like elastic!

    • profile image

      devon 7 years ago

      your forgetting the mutated ones and some woint die with ehad blow's and im with katanas and sword all theway

    • profile image

      Lachlan 7 years ago

      This is great information for all of us Kinemortophobics out there such as myself haha

    • MickS profile image

      MickS 7 years ago from March, Cambridgeshire, England

      Watcha Wayne

      :-)

      best

      Mick

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes cheers for that, extra ammo is always a good idea!

    • profile image

      zombiekiller 7 years ago

      if your going to kill tons of zombies make sure you have tons of amos and extra guns if run out of amos

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Hahaha lol sorry daydreaming can be a problem cheers now and yes the hardware store would be a great place to get some zombie killing tools!

    • miller200 profile image

      miller200 7 years ago

      i used to work in a hardware store, and whenever I saw an item which was new, i always thought would it be useful in a zombie attack? i lost my job due to daydreaming too much.

    • profile image

      Ben (zombie hunter) 7 years ago

      sorry robertsloan2 but a chainsaw is one of the worst weapons for fighting zombies. here's why:

      -They're heavy. A chainsaw can weigh up to, and in excess of ten pounds compared to a two pound machete

      -Their fuel supply is finite. Once drained they provide as much protection as a hand held radio

      -They're noisy. this noise will attract zombies

      if fighting zombies an experienced hunter like myself may recommend a crowbar, trench spike or shaolin spade

      if unsure ask yourself:

      1. can it crush or decapitate a skull in one blow?

      2. is it ligh?

      3. is it durable?

      Regards Ben

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      Ben (zombie hunter) 7 years ago

      Though not necessarily evil, zombies are creatures that need to be eradicated. Although there are rare exceptions, zombies exhibit no brain function due to necrosis or natural decomposition and therefore cannot feel emotions. much like a virus, they exist only to consume and nothing else.

      The exception i was talking about earlier was the 'nzumbe' this is where the word zombie originates. Nzumbe refers to the soul of the deceased and is the proper term for the voodoo zombie(perhaps the case with Xombie). although they may be similar, if you look closer they are different to true zombies:

      -They show emotion. they may show anger, sadness or even smile, unlike a true zombie

      -they feel pain. they may nurse a wound or even attemt to treat it, but unlike true zombies they wont ignore it

      - they recognise fire. though not necessarily afraid of it they will often avoid it, unlike a true zombie

      -they arent mindless killers.like a human, unless provoked, they don't show agression

      -and they can be reasoned with

      Basically if you are sure of a voodoo zombie, don't immediately kill it just let it pass.

      if you need more info Max Brooks(a fellow hunter) has written a detailed guide called 'The Zombie Survival Guide'

      regards Ben

      PS. sorry to be a butthole :(

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Cheers now!

      Zombies are everywhere!

    • Jim Strutzin profile image

      Jim Strutzin 7 years ago

      Useful information, you've definitely read the survival guide my friend.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes that'll do it kill the zombie!

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      nameless 7 years ago

      a more funnier way to kill a zombie if you live in an apartment building and u live on the top floor trow the tv out the window and hope you hit the fucker on the head haha

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Your welcome! spread the word!!

    • film critic profile image

      film critic 7 years ago

      Thanks for the list. It is very helpful. I will make a list and post on fridge just in case.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Er yes snake eyes...!

      I liked the Return of the Living Dead and the zombies were ace as they would say what they wanted and that was BRAINS!!!!!!!!

      Cheers Jellydonut25

    • jellydonut25 profile image

      jellydonut25 7 years ago from Buffalo, NY

      also, we need to hope that the zombies are not of the "Return of the Living Dead" variety since they were unkillable...still, at least they were pretty funny too...

    • Snake Eyes profile image

      Snake Eyes 7 years ago from Canada

      Lets not forget to belch/fart while doing your best Al bundy on the couch impersonation.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      I would chain them up and do some kinky stuff....ugh just kidding, no I would chain them up and do all the things they nagged me about in front of them, I'd throw my sockson the floor and leave them there for weeks,I'd leave hair in the sink,I'd eat my food whilst talking and I'd fart in their face and laugh!!!

    • Snake Eyes profile image

      Snake Eyes 7 years ago from Canada

      So here's a question for you, you have an ex girlfreind of boyfreind that turns into a zombie.....now do you still respectuflly be-head them in an honerable fashion. Or do you take you anger out on them for always nagging to take out the trash when that oh so important game is on.....usually at the most pivitol moments to boot.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Cheers now Richard!!

      Yes I've read your zombie survival guide, so cheers for the link back, I just think if we all know how to kill them, then we'll be ready for them when this Swine flu turns into a zombie virus!!

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      Richard Bivins 7 years ago from Charleston, SC

      Nice job Waynet, I think I'll link to it from my Zombie survival guide. In my guide I outline how to survice the attack and not how to kill the Zombies...

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Thanks Xomby for those common sense words of zombie killing wisdom...you heard it people, zombies are to be respected so chop off their heads with feeling!!!

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      Xomby 7 years ago

      This hub and the corrolating comments are rather offensive to us enslaved undead. It's not offensive due to the graphic nature by which you would dispose of said zombie (we do not fear death, we long for it), but rather because since death eludes us it dredges up feelings of isolated desperation. Loneliness is our only friend, and our Bokor will not allow us redemption. I therefore implore you, when killing your next zombie, do so with compassion and dignity because though we are not to be considered human, we were at one time. Sleep is wasted on the living.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Cheers now HC23!

      Zombies are everywhere, so lets stop them!!

    • HC23 profile image

      HC23 7 years ago

      Ah read the Zombie Survival Guide people. Chainsaws are a no no. I love this article. I never thought to think that household furniture could be used.

    • Cow Flipper profile image

      Sean Jankowski 7 years ago from Southern Oregon

      Awesome hub, fun and well written. Please check out mine Waynet http://hubpages.com/hub/Killing-Zombies. Keep it up and again your writing style is cool.

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      BChini 7 years ago

      nice post. you have to be you hit the right spot on the zombie. check it out.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes that's it sorted then, the marketing slogan is there!

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      bill yon 7 years ago from sourcewall

      glow in the dark zombie sticks sticks that move on their own arrrgghhrrr!!!

    • waynet profile image
      Author

      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yep that'll do it Bill, ground them into dust and make them into glue sticks and market them in a cool way, could be quite lucrative!

    • bill yon profile image

      bill yon 7 years ago from sourcewall

      how to kill a zombie?hmmmmmm?lets see lets see how would I kill a Zombie?I guess the only way to truly kill a zombie is to cremate them burn them down to ashe.total destruction of their bodies if not they will keep coming and coming and coming......

    • loveofnight profile image

      loveofnight 7 years ago from Baltimore, Maryland

      i am a sci-fi, horror,action movie fan but i just haven't been able to get past cannibalism to enjoy zombie movies....great hub none the less

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Light sabers would be cool if they actually had them, I'd be happily killing zombies with them all day and it would be great if as soon as you strike them down they just dissappear like obi wan kenobi after darth vader whacked him with a light saber!!

      Oh yes I liked that game...! killing zombies could turn into an actual olympic event!!

    • Mrvoodoo profile image

      Mrvoodoo 7 years ago from ?

      lol, great hub, I ran a poll on another site to determine the best weapon for zombie slaying and the most popular choice was a 'light-saber', not sure where you'd find one in the event of a zombie outbreak though.

      Not sure if you've played 'Left 4 Dead', but that's a great game for a bit of zombie slaying madness. =)

    • sibajar profile image

      sibajar 7 years ago

      Great Zombie hub, I gave it a rate up, I am a big zombie fan too. I got a Zombie Movie Hub https://hubpages.com/entertainment/Best-Zombie-Mov , check it out and leave a comment, I'd like to know what you think.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Thanks Val

      Current classics you have there and I call myself a horror film buff, especially the helicopter rotor blades slicing up some zombies or rage infected nutters, but the vinyl LP's and the winchester I should have remembered(but don't mention the Z word!)

      Script for a zombie project?

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yeah Chainsaws, how could I forget this, or even a lawn mower from that classicly funny movie Braindead(loved that film!) oh yeah Return of the living dead was the main films for body parts that wouldn't die. cheers Robert for the chainsaws, can't believe I forgot that one!!

    • Valerie F profile image

      Valerie F 7 years ago from Idaho Falls, ID

      I think it's rather happily ironic that you would post this the day I got a script for a zombie project approved. There are a couple anti-zombie weapons you forgot, however. Helicopter rotors and vinyl LP's have proven effective against zombies. As for guns, well the best to take them out would of course be a... Winchester!

    • robertsloan2 profile image

      robertsloan2 7 years ago from San Francisco, CA

      ROFLMAO!!! Love it. You forgot the ultimate classic though. Chainsaws are great against zombies, albeit leaving messy stinking rot splashing everywhere. Watch out for the kind where the pieces keep going after dismemberment too.

    • waynet profile image
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      Wayne Tully 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes we gotta prepare for zombie invasion and they'll have such reality show classics of their own like "I'm a zombie get me out of here" and "Zombies Kitchen"

      We have to end this when the time comes...zombies bah! we know how to stop you!

    • Uninvited Writer profile image

      Susan Keeping 7 years ago from Kitchener, Ontario

      Damn...that was on my list to write :)

      You did a much better job than I could have, this is must-have information!

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