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Eight Legged Freaks - Arachnophobia Meets Modern Chemistry for a Fantastic Creature Feature

Updated on September 10, 2014

Being a devout spider hater and just as avid creature feature lover, I had to see this. As per normal, the critics trashed it. I loved it.

It's so typical. Critics look for award winning acting, high toned drama, tear jerking knights saving the damsel in distress and so forth.

That's not the way of the beloved creature feature genre. It's campy, over the top, racy, witty and full of scary boo action. That's why we fans love it.

Follow along to check out just why I adore Eight Legged Freaks.

From stellar stunts to monster arachnids to a die hard conspiracy theorist that you just can't help but want to hug, it's got it all.


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Have you ever had a spider jump at you? On you? Chase you?

I have. Yuck doesn't even begin to describe it. I once had a spider get on my arm and freaked out so bad I literally jumped over the back of a couch. Just thinking about it gives me the skin crawling willies.

That's one reason I think creature features are so cool. We can explore those nasty things we really don't want to get near without ever leaving the couch or having one crawl on us. The one that freaked me out so bad years ago was the jumping kind. I remember vividly how he jumped just as I did. Gross!


Some people think bugs are cool.

Do you like spiders?

See results

Eight Legged Freaks has them all, jumpers, ones that shoot webbing, big ones, bigger ones, even a tarantula.

Just where, pray tell, did all these spiders come from? Seriously, this is sounding like a not believable at all plot. It is amazingly believable given the setting.

Think small town, desert type place in the great American no where. Just normal type run of the mill working class people live here. One guy, kind of nerdy, older, really nice, likes to collect spiders. Hey, everyone needs a hobby.


A face only a mother could love

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As usual, no one saw it coming but the kid. More typical, no one believed him.

Enter a super smart little boy with a healthy interest in insects and we have the vehicle that moves our plot forward once the modern chemicals man so loves to dump enter our unsuspecting town. In all fairness, in this situation, it really was an accident. All the better argument for banning them in my opinion. Just a thought.

Predictably, our stellar selection of exotic spiders become a mutant, megazoid, marching, arachnid army set upon attacking the townsfolk. Spiders have to eat too you know.


Watch spidy get smacked, or is it the other way around?

It just gets better and better.

While the spiders are escaping the outskirts heading into town, things get interesting on a personal level. It seems our town is going broke. The illustrious mayor has a solution to solve the problem while making himself a boatload. Politicians!

In typical political fashion, the mayor calls a meeting of the town's land owners to convince them all to sell. Enter our uber sexy, heart throb, David Arquette. His family owned the mine that used to be the town's main source of employment and he's not about to abandon it. He smells a rat.


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Does he save the day? I'm not telling but scope out the sheriff. She's no damsel, that's for sure.

Playing not only the voice of reason in a town about to go mad, but also loving mother to our super smart boy and one very young and rebellious Scarlett Johansson, this lady law dog is fantastic.

Check it out to see how her daughter takes after her more than one might think when confronted with the dreaded teen guy gets a bit too touchy feely pushy type scenario. It's a must see.


The action is awesome!

Do you like motorcycles? How about racing? This movie has the best sequence of guys racing through the dessert to escape the spiders you can imagine.

Just as good is the invasion of the town. From people to cars and businesses, nothing is safe. See how these normal Joe Americans react to a totally unprecedented aracknoid attack. Much of it is highly believable.


Is it all believable?

No. It isn't all believable but most of it is. One scene that I really love is totally and completely outside the realm of reason for me but only because I have worked with the material used.

Early on, our campy deputy sheriff, think a Barney Fife type character, has his kitty get trapped in the drywall he's replacing with one of the spiders. Of course, he has no idea the spider in question is there. Hilarious doesn't begin to describe it as the kitty and spider leave impressions on the Sheetrock throughout their fight.


Have a look at a few trailers, some of my favorite scenes and more arachnids than you can shake a stick at.

Originally released in 2002, directed by Ellory Elkayem and offering up some of the best spider induced scares around, be sure to scope on Eight Legged Freaks.


Eight Legged Freaks trailer

There are a few groupings of creatures that get done again and again. What are your favorites?

See results

Does anyone survive?

Not everyone, that's for sure but isn't that really what makes the best creature features rule?

If not one got eaten, where would be the scare?

Be sure to check out the most paranoid conspiracy theorist, Harlen, played by Doug E. Doug.

Check out what he does when confronted with the real deal, if you can see through the tears from laughing so much.

© 2014 Rhonda Lytle

Do you like creature features?  What are some of your favorites?

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    • Rhonda Lytle profile imageAUTHOR

      Rhonda Lytle 

      4 years ago from Deep in the heart of Dixie

      @tazzytamar: Me too, creep little things. Enjoy!

    • tazzytamar profile image

      Anna 

      4 years ago from chichester

      What a cool looking film! This would definitely give me the creeps as spiders scare me!

    • Rhonda Lytle profile imageAUTHOR

      Rhonda Lytle 

      4 years ago from Deep in the heart of Dixie

      @Heidi Vincent: I won't watch crazed ax murderer or satanic type horror films for the same nightmare reasons. I don't mind creature features I think because I know in the back of my head it's just a matter of killing it. Seems the ax murderers and satanists always come back! God bless and thanks for the cool comment. :)

    • Heidi Vincent profile image

      Heidi Vincent 

      4 years ago from GRENADA

      NO!!! :))) I hate the nightmares I get after watching them. Even the trailer here had me jumpy :) I read your review, though and would recommend it to any creature feature lover!

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