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Funniest Quotes of the Year

Updated on January 2, 2012

Funniest Quotations of the Year

As we say goodbye to 2011 and welcome 2012, let us review some of the funniest and wackiest things said by celebrities, politicians and world leaders. This lens has listed the funniest quotes from famous people in the foregone year.

This lens hopes to put a smile on your face as the world embrace 2012.

Chuck Nevitt
Chuck Nevitt

Funniest Quote on Family and Babies of the Year

"My sister is expecting a baby and I don't know if I am going to be an uncle or an aunt." [1]

- Chuck Nevitt (Former Basketball Player)

Funniest Political Gobbledygook

george w bush funny
george w bush funny

"I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right."

- George W. Bush (Former U.S. President) [2]

"A proof is a proof. What kind of proof? It's a proof. Proof is proof. And when you have a good proof, it's because it's proven."

- Jean Chretien (Former Prime Minister Of Canada) [3]

Funniest Quotes on Economy, US Dollar and Unemployment

Photo credit: thedraconian.com
Photo credit: thedraconian.com

"A true economist will tell you forecasting the currency is a random walk, which means you can't forecast it."

- Paul Bloxham (HSBC Chief Economist) [4]

"Continuing to own a currency that's going to be printed into oblivion - that's the official policy - is crazy."

- Robin Griffith (London Economic Strategist, on the US dollar) [5]

"In the end, we'll just ask the same questions. Where's the economy going, and what do various inflation indicator look like? We'll ask those questions."

- Ben Bernanke (Federal Reserve Chairman, on possibility of more economic recovery) [6]

"The Fed, like every other central bank, is powerless to prevent fluctuations in the cost of living and increases of individual prices. We do not produce oil. Nor do we grow food or provide health care."

- Dennis Lockhart (President of the Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta) [7]

"There is scope for reducing the unemployment through sensible monetary policy but that will leave probably a higher level of 'natural' unemployment than maybe we enjoyed before the recession."

- Dennis Lockhart (President of Atlanta Federal Reserve Bank) [8]

Funniest Quotes on Love, Marriage and Fidelity

Photo credit: thefablife
Photo credit: thefablife

"It's gotta be weird stuffing money into a stripper's bikini when every bill has a photo of your grandmother on it."

- Jimmy Fallon (Comedian, on Prince William's bucks party) [9]

"When you ASSUME to know that which you know nothing of you make an ASS out of U and ME."

- Ashton Kutcher (Actor, on cheating behind Demi Moore's back) [10]

'I once married 10 women in one year."

- Ziona Chana (a 66-year-old man in India that currently has 39 wives) [11]

"I carry condoms in my purse, even though I haven't had sex in a long time. I'm hoping for luck! And I carry them so I can give them to other people who might want or need them, or who might want to have a conversation."

- Sharon Stone (Actress) [12]

photo credit: commieblaster.com.
photo credit: commieblaster.com.

Funniest Quotes on Democracy and Unions Protests

"It is a sad fact that Western democracies provide less successful leadership than China."

- George Soros (Hungarian-American business magnate) [13]

"Every once in a while you need to get out on the streets and get a little bloody when necessary."

- Michael Capuano (U.S. Representative, on the Wisconsin union protests) [14]

Which quote above did you find funniest?

Jimmy Fallon
Jimmy Fallon

Which quote did you find funniest?

See results

Funniest Quotes of Debunked Leaders

Former Libyan President Muammar Gaddafi
Former Libyan President Muammar Gaddafi

"Our children have been manipulated by al Qaeda."

- Muammar Gaddafi (Former President of Libya) [15]

"We will fight until the last man, until the last woman, until the last bullet."

- Saif Al-Islam Gaddafi (Son of debunked Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi) [16]

"I am fed up. After 62 years in public service, I have had enough. I want to go."

- Hosni Mubarak (Debunked President of Egypt, after he has been forced to step down) [17]

"Get on, imbecile. All my life I've had to put up with your screw-ups."

- Leila Trabelsi (wife of deposed Tunisian president Zine el-Abidine Ben Ali, said to her husband as he hesitated to board the plane that would take them into exile) [18]

photo credit: iudexonline.com.
photo credit: iudexonline.com.

Funniest Quotes From Dirty Politicians

"I have diplomatic immunity."

- Dominique Strauss-Kahn (Former head of IMF, said to the police when charged with sexual assault of a maid in his suite). [19]

"I have always made it so that every woman feels, how should I say, special."

- Silvio Berlusconi (Former Italian Prime Minister) [20]

Which quote above did you find funniest?

Leila Trabelsi Ben Ali, the Lady Macbeth of Tunisia.
Leila Trabelsi Ben Ali, the Lady Macbeth of Tunisia.

Which quote did you find funniest?

See results

Funniest Quote On Being Smart

Photo credit: theblemish.com.
Photo credit: theblemish.com.

"I'm so smart now. Everyone is like "Take your top off." Sorry, No! They always want to get that money shot. I'm not stupid."

- Paris Hilton [21]

Funniest Quote on Taxes

cat taxes funny pictures
cat taxes funny pictures

"Opening the Tax Act is like opening the door to a parallel universe."

- Patrick Keane (Chief Justice of the Federal Court of Australia) [22]

Funniest Quote on Apocalypse

Apocalypse
Apocalypse

"The world would end on 21 May 2011, if not, then on 21 October 2011."

- Harold Camping (Preacher) [23]

Coach Bill Peterson
Coach Bill Peterson

Funniest Quote from Sport Coach

"You guys pair up in group of three, then line up in a circle."

Bill Peterson (Florida State Football Coach) [24]

Funniest Quote on World Hunger and Humanity

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those files and death and stuff."

- Mariah Carey (Singer) [25]

Barney Frank U.S. Representative Massachusetts.
Barney Frank U.S. Representative Massachusetts.

Did you think the people quoted here can be so clueless?

See results

Reference

[1]"Top 10 stupid quotes by celebrities", http://www.topyaps.com/top-10-stupid-quotes-by-cel...

[2] Ibid.

[3] Ibid.

[4] "Quotations of the Year", http://www.pierpont.com.au/article.php?Chameleon-h...

[5] Ibid.

[6] "The 31 Most Ridiculous Quotes Of 2011 So Far",http://www.endoftheamericandream.com/archives/the-...

[7] Ibid.

[8] Ibid.

[9] "Funny and Stupid Quotes by Celebrities", http://www.fun-zen.com/funny/funny-and-stupid-quot...

[10] Ashton Kutcher, http://www.facebook.com/Ashton/posts/1015029234855...

[11] See Note [4].

[12] "Top 50 stupid & crazy celebrity quotes", http://www.glamourvanity.com/celebrities/they-said...

[13] See Note [6].

[14] See Note [6].

[15] See Note [6].

[16] See Note [6].

[17] See Note [6].

[18] See Note [6].

[19] "Dominique Strauss-Kahn tried to claim diplomatic immunity" The Guardian, 17 June 2011, http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/jun/17/domini...

[20] See Note [6].

[21] "Funny (and dumb) celebrity quotes", http://funwithsmiley.blogspot.com/2011/03/funny-an...

[22] "Quotations of the Year", http://www.pierpont.com.au/article.php?Chameleon-h...

[23] Ibid.

[24] See Note [1].

[25] "Top 50 stupid & crazy celebrity quotes", http://www.glamourvanity.com/celebrities/they-said...

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    • greg2biz2 profile image

      greg2biz2 5 years ago

      great and funny.

    • profile image

      crazy4u2 5 years ago

      Some fabulous collection to share. I thoroughly enjoyed reading them.

    • profile image

      antoniow 5 years ago

      Fantastic lens, I like it! :)

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Very funny, what a great idea for a lens!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I got a kick out the quotes. :)

    • dumhaka profile image

      dumhaka 5 years ago

      It's very funny. I like the funny quotes

    • decvamlada profile image

      decvamlada 5 years ago

      Very fun lens!

    • beaworkathomemom profile image

      beaworkathomemom 5 years ago

      Funny.

    • JJNW profile image

      JJNW 5 years ago from USA

      Wow. Some of those are wild.

    • Fcuk Hub profile image

      Fcuk Hub 5 years ago

      funny staff you've got here :)

    • top101 profile image

      top101 5 years ago

      haha very cute!

    • TTMall profile image

      TTMall 5 years ago

      great lens!

    • TenPoundTenor profile image

      TenPoundTenor 5 years ago

      Brilliant lens. Quite a few good laughs

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I think politicians would make great comedians, but then they would have to know what they were talking about.

    • WebWriteGirl LM profile image

      WebWriteGirl LM 5 years ago

      Hilarious!

    • Rangoon House profile image

      AJ 5 years ago from Australia

      So funny!

    • greenmind profile image

      GreenMind 5 years ago from USA

      Lovely lens -- I spent a lot of time here -- had ton read them all...

    • TransplantedSoul profile image

      TransplantedSoul 5 years ago

      ... ha ha... more coming soon from the politicians as we continue through the primaries and the presidential election!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Cool lens

    • Dragon 40 profile image

      Ken McVay 5 years ago from Nanaimo, British Columbia

      Nicely done! Blessed for great content and presentation.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Haha. Cool lens

    • spanos50 lm profile image

      spanos50 lm 5 years ago

      Good and hard work . The results is obvious

    • profile image

      sherioz 5 years ago

      Out with the inanities of 2011 and in with the inanities of 2012!

    • Scarlettohairy profile image

      Peggy Hazelwood 5 years ago from Desert Southwest, U.S.A.

      Mariah Carey's is the dumbest. Duh.

    • PositiveChristi1 profile image

      PositiveChristi1 5 years ago

      Some funny quotes here, and some that are quite sad too.

    • tonyb65 profile image

      tonyb65 5 years ago

      I think it was George W Bush who said " The French don't have word for entrepreneur" although some attribute the comment to John Prescott

    • profile image

      edjenura 5 years ago

      LOL this is very entertaining, I enjoy reading it :)

    • profile image

      cupcakekitten20 5 years ago

      I liked this lense. It's nice to see a funny one =) and I loved the polls you put throughout. I love polls!

    • profile image

      ernad18 5 years ago

      verry nice inkhand.... good work

    • bharat01 profile image

      bharat01 5 years ago

      Fun lens......, and very nice work done by you..., good job.........:)

    • profile image

      poutine 5 years ago

      Cool quotes

    • profile image

      natandmarie 5 years ago

      Very funny! But the Mariah Carey one is a fake. We're friends with a devout Mariah Carey fan. Devout.

    • profile image

      travelerme 5 years ago

      I heard you had a 1k poll trophy and I was wondering if you wanted to do 100 more on my lens congrats

    • rangiiria profile image

      rangiiria 5 years ago

      Humour is good - thanks

    • profile image

      FishFearMe 5 years ago

      Very cool! I love to read about some of the stupid stuff well-known people spew. It reveals what kind of knuckleheads they really are.

      Yogi Berra was a quotable machine. For example Yogi once said, "90% of this game is half mental."

      Thanks for the laugh.

    • SecondHandJoe LM profile image

      SecondHandJoe LM 5 years ago

      Remember some- enjoyed all. great lens. 'liked' it!

    • Hypersapien2 profile image

      Hypersapien2 5 years ago from U.S.

      Enjoyed these.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      its very inspiring... lol

    • profile image

      drawnindigital 5 years ago

      Great lens, funny stuff!

    • Monstermom69 profile image

      Monstermom69 5 years ago

      Great page,thanks for sharing :)

    • CuAllaidh profile image

      Jeff Johnston 5 years ago from Alberta Canada

      great lens, kept me laughing

    • ernieplotter profile image

      ernieplotter 5 years ago

      Nice lens! You made me laugh badly!

    • SayGuddaycom profile image

      SayGuddaycom 5 years ago

      Very good idea for a lens

    • profile image

      julieannbrady 5 years ago

      Ah, the proof is in the pudding! And ... "A proof is a proof. What kind of proof? It's a proof. Proof is proof. And when you have a good proof, it's because it's proven."

    • profile image

      sheezie77 5 years ago

      Very nice lens great work! thumbs up

    • NorDac LM profile image

      NorDac LM 5 years ago

      Great collection!

    • flicker lm profile image

      flicker lm 5 years ago

      Nice collection of funny quotes! Thanks!

    • profile image

      rottenpixies 5 years ago

      Great reminders of quotes of 2012. Really nice lens! Thumbs up!

    • squid-pinkchic18 profile image

      squid-pinkchic18 5 years ago

      You've got some hilarious quotes here! Great idea for a lens.

    • WriterJanis2 profile image

      WriterJanis2 5 years ago

      Really funny quotes.

    • JK Sterling profile image

      Jim Sterling 5 years ago from Franklin, Tennessee

      That's funny, thanks for a great lens.

    • James20 profile image

      James20 5 years ago

      Funny

    • niceman91 lm profile image

      niceman91 lm 5 years ago

      Nice collection.Some of them really funny :)

    • sukkran trichy profile image

      sukkran trichy 5 years ago from Trichy/Tamil Nadu

      Really a lovely collection of funny quotes. enjoyed my visit. thanks

    • domain19 profile image

      domain19 5 years ago

      thanks for share this funny lens.... :D

    • Daphsam LM profile image

      Daphsam LM 5 years ago

      These are great!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Love these funnies!

    • DANCING COWGIRL profile image

      Dancing Cowgirl Design 5 years ago from Texas

      I'll bet some of these people are wishing for a do over! Fun stuff.

    • williemack58 profile image

      williemack58 5 years ago

      I have enjoyed this lens it has been fun and entertaining.

    • profile image

      acliff 5 years ago

      Great lens, I always love reading funny quotes!

    • ByQueenBy profile image

      ByQueenBy 5 years ago

      nice lens..i like some funny quotes you have here... :)

    • profile image

      jeremykim2011 5 years ago

      Some of these quotes are not funny. I am actually surprised that some people can be so clueless.

    • RUUnique profile image

      RUUnique 5 years ago

      Great. Thanks.

    • dogface lm profile image

      dogface lm 5 years ago

      Nice job on this lens!

      Btw, is Chuck Nevitt really that tall? Unbelievable!

    • kathysart profile image

      kathysart 5 years ago

      Wow.. you did a lot of research for this lens.. tons of quotes and subjects. Blessed.

    • pinkrenegade lm profile image

      pinkrenegade lm 5 years ago

      really good stuff, u really did your research. Thanks for sharing.

    • KimGiancaterino profile image

      KimGiancaterino 5 years ago

      Good stuff ... nice to see that Ms. Hilton is as eloquent as ever.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Lots of funny quotes, thanks for sharing!

    • AllPurposePapoon profile image

      AllPurposePapoon 5 years ago

      Thanks for the laughs. I'm still laughing on the Mariah Carey one. Great stuff!

    • profile image

      socialnetworksoft 5 years ago

      thanks for the laugh at the beginning of the day.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Loved it and it was a nice way to start the day

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      love the funnies, needed something like this tonight as I'm finishing up being on the computer tonight.

    • kimark421 profile image

      kimark421 5 years ago

      Wow, I didn't realize some of these people were that...umm...challenged between the ears. Great laughs here. Thanks!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Good lense. Gave me a much needed laught.

    • PlethoraReader profile image

      Matthew 5 years ago from Silicon Valley

      Thanks for the laughs!

    • Close2Art LM profile image

      Close2Art LM 5 years ago

      very funny, Blessed!

    • Deadicated LM profile image

      Deadicated LM 5 years ago

      Funny!

    • Coolboots profile image

      Coolboots 5 years ago

      This is cute, I had a few good chuckles!

    • BusyMOM LM profile image

      BusyMOM LM 5 years ago

      Some good laughs here!

    • mannasugar profile image

      mannasugar 5 years ago

      Very funny....

    • Loveyourshoes profile image

      Loveyourshoes 5 years ago

      brilliant!

    • Wbisbill LM profile image

      Barbara Isbill 5 years ago from New Market Tn 37820

      Funny. Thanks.

    • Virginia Allain profile image

      Virginia Allain 5 years ago from Central Florida

      It's amazing how goofy people can be.

    • profile image

      Bluecat555 5 years ago

      So funny, I love the Cat Tax photo...

    • profile image

      jrs5858 5 years ago

      very funny, thank you

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      some peoples are pretty stupid... you can search on youtube for "americans are idiots" and see what results you get... no offense, every nation have "smart" peoples...