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A Gift Guide: My Wishlist

Updated on October 22, 2014

Now it's easy to shop for me!

All my family and friends tell me I'm impossible to shop for. But I don't think that's true. I'm constantly talking about cool new gadgets I've seen online and I'm constantly thumbing through magazines marking all the cool stuff with little sticky notes. Plus when I'm at the store, I'm not shy about pointing something out to my husband. while giving him "the look".

So I can only assume that the reason I'm so hard to shop for is because nobody listens to me.

Although it's clearly not my fault, I feel the need to give some guidance. These are all the presents I'd like to receive this year. You don't have to get me everything at once. I'm fine with you spreading them out throughout the year. Heck, I'll even include the best dates for you to give me presents.

Mothers Day

May 8

What did you just say?

You think you don't have to get me anything because I'm not your mother?

Well, you can just turn around and march your little hind end right back to your room!

You can come out when you're ready to apologize and pay for my next gift.

Wacom Bamboo Pen Tablet

I refuse to take any part of the blame for wanting this tablet so badly. A couple months ago LadyLovelace wrote a very impressive review on this Wacom Bamboo Tablet. I knew before I had even finished reading it that I just had to have one. The only thing standing in my way is the fact that I'm so dang cheap. After thinking long and hard about it, I finally came to the conclusion that you should buy it for me. Okay?

It's settled then. I'll expect delivery by next Friday.

The coolest aquarium ever!

I'm scared to death of fish. Seriously, I can't swim in rivers, lakes or ponds because I'm so scared the fish are going to nibble my toes. The last time I touched a goldfish I screamed bloody murder and shook for an hour after they took him away. That right there should show you how serious I am about wanting this. I mean, I'm willing to risk life and limb just so I can showcase a ferocious Beta swimming around in the coolest fish tank ever!

If I'm willing to risk my life, the least you can do is pay for it.

My Wedding Anniversary

October 6

Yeah. I know.

John is the one who should be getting me a gift for our Anniversary.

But John sucks.

If it were up to him, he would see all these great gifts I picked out and still end up ordering a tackle box and a fly fishing pole.

So this year, it's on you.

I'll also take a Power Juicer

This isn't just any power juicer. This is the Jack LaLanne Power Juicer Juicing Machine! Top of the line; cream of the crop. I actually wanted this for Christmas last year. I spent 11 months thinking about it; 11 months planning all the different juices I would make; 11 months imagining how much thinner I would be once I started drinking fresh juice everyday. Then one day my Mother-in-Law said "Do you really want that? You'll never use it".

I know. I'm weak. All it took was one little question to make me give up on a year-long dream. But have no fear. I'm dreaming of juice again and this time I'm not going to let anything get in the way!

So could you put it in the cart?

And pay for it?

A Weight Bench

I don't just want this, I need this! We used to have one. But then my husband decided to take it to the scrap yard with all the other metal. So now I just have weights. I still use them, but it's just not the same. Have you ever tried to do leg lifts while sitting on a rather tall bed? It's really hard (and I know I look stupid when I do it). Plus it's pretty hard for my husband to spot me when there's a big metal headboard in the way.

Now quit complaining and just get it for me. It's not like I'm asking for a diamond ring!


December 24

Christmas is really important. It's not about what present you give me. It's about how many.

It's up to you to make sure I have more presents than John. If that means that you have to get every single gift on this page, go ahead and do it. I won't be upset.

Just let me know so I can make

you another list.

A Hammock - or a Hammock Chair

This gift idea is motivated by pure greed. You see, John's best friend has a really cool hammock chair hanging from his back porch. It's blue and it has some liquor label on it. Every time we go over there, I head straight for the hammock. It's just so comfortable! I mean, I could probably live in it the rest of my life and still be happy. Because I truly do want this Hammock, I offered to pay them what they paid for it.

No deal.

Seriously? It's not my fault they got it for free.

A Fluffy Wuffy Oh-My-Gosh Body Pillow

Can you just imagine being able to curl up in one of these every night when you go to bed? I actually got over my cheapness long enough to order one a couple months ago. Well, I didn't exactly order this exact one. There was a cheaper one and I figured it was the same thing so I went ahead and got that one. It didn't take me long to figure out that it wasn't the same one. When I got it, one of the seams was ripped. Plus it didn't even come with a pillowcase. So I sent it back. What can I say? I tried.

Now it's your turn. I would recommend not getting the cheap one.

My Birthday

December 28

For my birthday I would like yellow cake with chocolate frosting.

(homemade, of course)

You can get me anything on

this page. Just make sure to wrap

it up pretty. Go ahead and use

that shiny wrapping paper.

And don't forget the

ribbons and bows.

A Jewelry Box I actually like!

I am soooo picky when it comes to jewelry boxes. I hate those little side doors that open up to reveal a twirling hook to hang all your necklaces. They're never tall enough, so my necklaces end up dragging on the bottom of the box. I have a bunch of jewelry and right now it's all sitting in a cheesy little wooden box. My belly button rings are getting mixed up with my earrings. My necklaces are getting tangled with my bracelets. It's a complete zoo! If you were to get me this box, you would be my jewelry hero!

Well? What are you waiting for? Go be a hero!

Just so you know, an empty box is NOT my idea of a funny joke!

Just so you know, an empty box is NOT my idea of a funny joke!
Just so you know, an empty box is NOT my idea of a funny joke!

Please don't fight!

There's no need to fight over who gets to give me which present. There are enough presents so that you can each get me one. If I have to add more, I guess that's just something I'll have to do.

What present are you going to get me?

One last thing

Don't be cheap!

Ship it overnight delivery

© 2011 Othercatt

So.....Whatcha gettin me? lol

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    • SusannaDuffy profile image

      Susanna Duffy 4 years ago from Melbourne Australia

      Happy gift days to you!

    • victoriahaneveer profile image

      victoriahaneveer 5 years ago

      This made me laugh! I actually did an Amazon wishlist a while back and posted it on Facebook. And got a few of the items on it! (Not the 9999 dollar diamond necklace, just a couple of the cheaper things but it's the thought that counts... or so they say).

    • NYtoSCimjustme profile image

      NYtoSCimjustme 6 years ago

      OMG! I love your sense of humor! This was just what I needed this morning... And I might actually prefer SquidJail - I wouldn't have to do all this dad-gum house work and put up this tree.. (no it is STILL NOT UP!) Thanks for the giggles this morning! I hope Santa brings you everything on this list - I put in a good word for you...

    • KimGiancaterino profile image

      KimGiancaterino 6 years ago

      Oh, I like the fine print. Good luck on your wish list. I have found it easier to just buy gifts for myself.