ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is an Alien

Updated on July 22, 2018
This is what my boyfriend really looks like.
This is what my boyfriend really looks like. | Source

He would make me moan and squeal sounds that I thought I was never capable of.

This was some other stuff. Stuff so otherworldly that I had never experienced before. He knew all the right things to say and the right moves to make and all the right places to touch. It was almost as if he had studied the female species like no other human.

He was testing my humanly boundaries of pleasure to see how far I could go. Frankly, I went far, far away; almost into another galaxy.

Well, at least at first.

It’s only fair to say that at first our sex life was on another planet. But now, it’s all come crashing down to Earth. At first I tried rationalizing it saying most good things don’t last but then I realized that wasn’t the case here. I’ve come to suspect that my boyfriend is not who he claims to be.

Do you ever get the feeling that the man sleeping next to you has become a sudden stranger? That’s exactly how I feel right now. I suspect my boyfriend is an alien. Not the illegal kind but one with an “extra terrestrial” connect.

May be I’m being paranoid. It’s a tendency with us women: when things are going smooth we miss the upheaval, the chaos, and tend to find faults with what’s perfectly normal. But all said and done, there’s been some pretty hard to ignore “signs.”

Like the other day, I suggested that we watch the movie Signs. There’s nothing abnormal about watching an M. Night Shamayalan movie (well, at least once in a while, right?). I proposed it of course. Considering that my boyfriend’s fascination with sci-fi movies goes beyond the normal, I thought he would welcome the suggestion of watching it agan. But instead, he blew up. He took great personal offense to the portrayal of the alien race in that movie. “Why would aliens who are afraid of water come to a planet that’s 70% water?” He said it with such conviction that I was taken aback. This was surely a sign that something was off (but then again this one is apparent to most intelligent humans too). Well, now he loves playing it over and over again to point out the flaws in Signs.

So I told myself may be that’s not enough evidence to jump to such an outlandish conclusion: that my boyfriend is an alien from outer space. It was an attempt to pacify myself, but that didn’t work. Something in my gut told me… “The truth is out there” and there was only one thing left for me to do, dig it out!

I set up a bunch of hidden cameras in our apartment and started gathering evidence.There has been some obvious signs that confirm that I indeed cohabitate with an alien.

Here’s what I found, this might just help you figure if your boyfriend has the ET factor. The fact is that they are amongst us and many have made contact and penetrated the human race. So beware, before you know it you might be in a relationship of the third kind.


Here are the telling signs:

At times, he is incoherent. Couples often talk nonsense when they bicker. Many a times their speech seems alien, like a foreign dialect being tossed around. It doesn’t matter who provoked whom but something innocuous could lead to allegations thrown about, the past unearthed, and soon all that’s heard is gibberish. But when that gibberish sounds like no language you’ve ever heard before or you can’t comprehend what he’s saying, that’s an alarm bell.

Not just that, his voice often reaches a frequency that messes with your brain function. If this is a frequent feature with your boyfriend, beware you might have an alien on your hands.

He gets home sick a lot. When I say a lot, I mean all the time. I’m all for a man who loves his family, but the day he moved in with me I though our apartment would be home. There are nights where I’ve found him staring deep into space, looking up at the stars for hours. It’s as if he’s trying to find something. At first I thought this was a dreamy and enviable quality that I was lucky to find in my man. Now I know the he’s probably searching for his home planet.

He’s touchy about his cell phone. In the sense that he wants no one to ever touch it. He cares for it as if is a communication device from another planet. Once we were goofing around, I happened to snatch his phone and take it to the bathroom pretending to read his messages. Okay, even with a boyfriend who was Earth bound this would probably invoke some rage but this one just went berserk. He was on the verge of dislodging the bathroom door. Well I did cheat and check his cell phone out and what I found was itsy bitsy freaky. All his calls said ‘home.’ Now he lets me nowhere near it. He’s worried I might see his many calls ‘home.’ The cell phone’s now locked, bolted and password protected that even a spy couldn’t crack.

He colonizes your space. Now if he’s moved in with you, taken the next big step, and you are gloating with joy, don’t! Because he’s done this with an ulterior motive. Colonization is all that’s he has on his mind. If it’s not an entire planet then it’s your room. Watch out! He’ll slowly colonize the entire bed. Soon you’ll open the wardrobe to find his color coordinated shirts and pajamas. He’s taken over your space. Eaten into it!

Unsure of what his real intentions are? They could range from gradual mind control to anything up to enslaved labor. At one point, not only did my boyfriend take over my entire room but I remember I was running errands for him through the day. Every spare minute went in either picking up his dry cleaning or getting him cup cakes from his favorite patisserie.

He’s gifted. If he’s an alien he’s bound to have some gifts. So if you’ve found broken things mended all of a sudden better be alarmed. While this skill can probably come in handy, it’s still pretty creepy. So when he’s testing you, you can do a little testing of your own. Try to find out what other gifts he has. That’s a sure shot way of confirming your suspicion. I walked in on my boyfriend playing the violin with his legs one day. He said it was just one of his many talents. No really!

So if you see the signs, and suspect that your boyfriend is an alien, get ready to load up the mother-ship and send him back packing to his ‘home’ planet. Make sure you try a certain brain washing exercise once you get rid of him. Wipe out all memory of the time spent with your alien specimen. It’ll give you a better chance at striking a relationship with a species of your kind.

UFO: My boyfriend's ride
UFO: My boyfriend's ride | Source

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)