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Funny Star Wars Jokes n Quotes

Updated on June 1, 2014

Hilarious Star Wars Jokes, Quotes and Humor

A lens for Star Wars fans with a sense of humor!

We have funny Star Wars Quotes, Candid Pictures, Star Wars Parody Videos and the funniest Star Wars Jokes and Comics.

Discover the lighter side of all your favorite Star Wars characters such as Darth Vader, Storm Troopers, Han Solo, Chewbacca, Princess Leia, R2D2, C3-PO Jedis and more!

Darth Vader Plays Golf

Dagoba Pulp Fiction - Samuel L. Jackson tells it like it is.

Luke Skywalker's Biggest Fan?

Top 10 Reasons Anakin Skywalker Went to the Dark Side

1. Wanted cool voice like James Earl Jones'

2. Owed money to Jabba the Hutt, could refinance debt through the Empire

3. Wanted to use the Force to prop up Chrysler stock

4. Charmed by Emperor Palpatine's seductive after-shave

5. Misunderstood name, thought the "Dirk Side" was fan club for pretty-boy actor Dirk Benedict

6. Kicked in head by bantha

7. To impress the babes

8. To escape cruel taunting over dorky name

9. Sick and tired of mentor Obi-Wan Kenobi reciting lines from "Bridge over the River Kwai"

10. Generous Dark Lords of the Sith pension plan

Darth makes a tough call to the Emperor - Hiliarous Animated Emperor Parody

Choice quotes:

"what the hell is an aluminum falcon!?"

"death star was blown up by a bunch of ******* teenagers!"

Even Rebels make Excuses - These will sound familiar to video gamers...

Stormtrooper Regrets - Ever have one of those days?

Smartass Vader - Damn that Darth Vader can be a wanker!

A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master.

Bad Chewie!

This is a funny Star Wars cartoon from See Mike Draw.

The Jedi Gym - Stick with this video - it starts funny but builds to a surprise awesome.

Jedi Squirrels! - May your nuts be with you.

Darth Vader meets Hello Kitty

Instant Regrets, this girlie pink and white Hello Kitty Vader is not a good look.

Star Wars Jokes


Luke and Obi-Wan are in a Chinise restaurant and Luke's having trouble.

Finally, Obi-Wan says, "Use the forks, Luke."

Darth Vader and Luke.

Suddenly in the middle of the fight, Darth Vader pulls Luke to him, and whispers "I know what you're getting for Christmas!"

Luke exclaims "But how??!?"

"It's true Luke, *breath* I know what you're getting for Christmas."

Luke tries to ignore this, but tears himself free, screaming "How could you know this?!"

Vader replies, "I felt your presents."

"What's the difference between a lightsaber and a wookiee?"

"I don't know."

"You'd be a fine one to send after my lightsaber."

Yoda and Obi-Wan walked into a bar and bought a 5 dollar drink.

Yoda, seeing that he only had 4 dollars asked Obi-Wan, "Have a dollar do you? A little short I am."

Two droids were talking.

One says to the other, "Did you beat the Wookiee at Dejarikk?"

And the other answers, "Yes, but it cost me an arm and a leg."

MTV Star Wars Parody Sketch - Jimmy Fallon plays Anakin Skywalker at the 2005 MTV Movie Awards.

The Economy is Tough for Everyone - Kind of sad to see Darth Vader has hit Skid Row

Unemployed Trooper

R2D2 Serves Cake - R2d2 Rather work for Jabba the Hutt then suffer this indignity.

Q: Why is a droid mechanic never lonely?

A: Because he's always making new friends.

Question and Answer Star Wars Jokes

Funny Star Wars Jokes for Kids

Q: When did Anakin's Jedi teachers know he was going bad?

A: In the Sith Grade.

Q: What do you call a Sith who won't fight?

A: A Sithy.

Q: How is Ducktape like the Force?

A: It has a Dark Side, a Light side and it binds the galaxy together.

Q: What's the difference between an ATAT and a stormtrooper?

A: One's an Imperial walker and the other is a walking Imperial.

Q: What goes, "Ha, ha, ha, haaaa.... AGGGHHHH! Thump"?

A: An Imperial Officer laughing at Darth Vader.

Q: Why should you never tell jokes on the Falcon?

A: The ship might crack up.

Q: Which Star Wars character works at a restaurant?

A: Darth Waiter.

Q: Why do Doctors make the best Jedi?

A: Because a Jedi must have patience.

Q: What did the rancor say after he ate a Wookiee?

A: Chewie!

Check out these sweet sports cars Vader and the Stormtrooper drive on weekends off - which one is cooler? I believe Vader is cruising in an Ariel Atom and the Trooper is racing along in a Lotus Elise, both fine automobiles but you can only pick one!

Who's Got the Coolest Ride?

See results

Injured Stormtrooper - This is a funny and well made fan film.

Imperial Storm-Pooper

"I knew I shouldn't have drank the water on Tatooine..."

Like to Polish Your Helmet? - This could be the product for you!

Not for Kids Lightbulb Joke: How many Sith does it take to screw in a hyperdrive?

Two, but I don't know how they got in there!

Highlight black to see answer!

Jabba the Fat Kitteh - Star Wars LOL Cats

* You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

* Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

* You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

* At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

* You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

* You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

* The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

* Wookies are offended by your B.O.

* You have ever used the Force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

* You have ever used the Force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.

* Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side... it'll be a hoot."

* You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

* You have a Confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

* You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

* Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

* You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

* You were the only one drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

* Your business cards read "Billy Bob, Jedi Master".

* You know Ewoks squeal like pigs.

* You use your R-2 unit as a beer coaster.

* Your land-speeder had a light saber rack.

* If you hear ... "Billy Bob, I am your father ... AND your uncle!"

Popular Stop Wars anti-war shirts with Star Wars font.
Many colors and styles available for men, women, kids and babies.

Riff Trax vs The Phantom Menace - Kind of like MST3K with funny comments overdubbed on the movie.

Join the Darkside - Get a Cookie

Lens Length Poll - Did this page take longer than a Kessel Run to load?

Although the Millennium Falcon made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs this page may not load that fast. It keeps growing and growing like Jabbas gut with all the hilarious Star Wars geek humor out there.

Please vote and let me know what you think, is this lens too long?

See results

Awesome Lego Millennium Falcon - Great gift for kids or adults!

LEGO Star Wars Millennium Falcon 7965
LEGO Star Wars Millennium Falcon 7965

This replica of Han Solo's iconic starship is crafted from more than 1,200 LEGO pieces with great details including twin flick missiles, rotating laser cannons, and detachable cockpit cover, this Millennium Falcon set's got more than a few surprises left in it. This set includes LEGO mini-figures of Han Solo, Chewbacca, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia Organa, and Darth Vader, so you can replay your favorite scenes from the movie.


Boba Fett Baggage Claim

Do you have a funny Star Wars joke to add? A favorite line in the film or character you like the most? Why not let us know here in the guestbook.

If you enjoyed this lens don't forget toclick the stars or favorite us for later!

Sign the Guestbook - Hope you enjoyed the Star Wars Humor Lens!

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    • profile image


      4 years ago

      You are so incredible! I met you beucsae of Cameron And I'm a nerd like him jaja I loooooveeee photography I admire you so much I love how you edit Cameron's videos :B I wish to be as good as you someday! Good luck wish you the best!

    • profile image


      4 years ago

      It's always a relief when someone with obvious extpreise answers. Thanks!

    • blestman lm profile image

      blestman lm 

      5 years ago

      Fun lens. Thanks! It is hard to pick the best section because you had so many good things in here.

    • teelover profile image


      5 years ago

      Great lens! :D

    • Steve Dizmon profile image

      Steve Dizmon 

      5 years ago from Nashville, TN

      Great fun Lens. Thanks

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      Haha! That was very hilarious. You guys who made this have great sense of humor. I liked it!

    • kaseyrivenburgh profile image


      5 years ago

      Really awesome !!!!

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      I think the joke that is funniest is: "She must have hidden the plans in her pants,send a detatchment down to retrieve them."

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Yoda: Pants matters not. Look at me. Judge me by may pants, do you? Hmm?

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Interesting in a bizarre way - sort of like a car wreck on the side of the road.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      make jokes for the starwars episodes 7, 8, and 9

    • RedHairedRockHead profile image


      6 years ago


    • profile image


      6 years ago

      @anonymous: lol

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      I loved this (: it made my day. Long live Star Wars!

    • maceemiller123 profile image


      6 years ago

      Awesome!! Enough said i think - 10 out of 10

    • Zhana21 profile image


      6 years ago

      Sometimes you just need a laugh. Great lens.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      I HAVE to show this to my husband. He's a Star Wars fan and a golf nut, so he'll especially like the Darth Vador playing golf video. Love it!

    • Virginia Allain profile image

      Virginia Allain 

      6 years ago from Central Florida

      Great stuff and I'm featuring this on my Star Wars party lens.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      awesome designs starwars etc.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      haha! great distraction from studying for finals. thanks!

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Female Darth Vader:

      "Oh, Lukie Pookie, I'm your mother! Would you like some death by chocolate cookies? And I literally mean DEATH BY CHOCOLATE!!!!

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      What a great lens. My husband and I just discovered the Star Wars Lego cartoons and couldn't stop laughing. Worth checking out:)

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Your lens really made my day better. Great choices.

    • AstroGremlin profile image


      6 years ago

      Star Wars humor is the best kind.

    • tonybonura profile image

      Tony Bonura 

      6 years ago from Tickfaw, Louisiana

      Of course, I enjoyed it. I'm a Star Wars Fan. Too long? Maybe it should be longer--that's how much I liked it.


    • profile image


      6 years ago

      100% full of entertaining , I REALLY ENJOY A LOT Thanks WWW.JOKESFB.COM

    • eightieschild profile image


      6 years ago

      great lens, if a little long. lol at the storm-pooper! ;)

    • JaskeMann profile image


      6 years ago

      Great lens! Love the pix.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      This was some of the funniest stuff i ever read. gonna have to show this to my best friend.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Hi, your lens is really unique, I love star wars, thanks for the chuckles.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Hahahahahahaha, Redneck Jedi. My day SUCKED the first time I found this, I laughed for at least ten minutes straight, especially with the Jimmy Fallon bit and the Stormtrooper regrets.

    • Mikewrites LM profile image

      Mikewrites LM 

      6 years ago

      Some really funny stuff in here, nice work!

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      @enjoyecigs: star wars is to cool for geeks

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Loved the jokes. Had a bad day and this really helped!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Great jokes. May the farce be with you.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      this was good for a laugh to brighten my day. (geeky jokes are always fun for me :) thanks

    • Frednun1965 profile image

      Fred Alb 

      7 years ago from Uruguay

      Very cute and funny lens. I really had fun with the humor in this lens.

      I love starwars and is very funny to see these funny situations. congrats a very good job.

    • VeseliDan profile image


      7 years ago

      These jokes are really funny!

    • GypsyPirate LM profile image

      GypsyPirate LM 

      7 years ago

      "May the force be with y'all." Loved it!!

    • SandyDell profile image

      Sandy Dell 

      7 years ago from Lenore, Idaho

      Too funny! Thanks for sharing!!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Really Cool lens :>{)

    • firstcookbooklady profile image

      Char Milbrett 

      7 years ago from Minnesota

      Happy Star Wars Day to you! Now I have a 'warped' sense of humor... may the force be with you!

    • Jo11 profile image


      7 years ago

      Enjoyed this lens, great work - May the fourth be with you huh. Never heard of it 'til today - I must be from another galaxy, far, far away...

    • TLStahling profile image

      TL Stahling 

      7 years ago from US

      What a fun time. Thanks for taking the time to create this...non-stop laughing.

    • jeremecausing profile image

      Jereme Causing 

      7 years ago from Philippines

      Your lens really made me smile :) I had a great time here :)

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      OMFG, *LOVE* this lens!!!! thanks for putting it up for nerds like us :)

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Loved your lens. Super funny. Good Friday afternoon reading.

    • MartieG profile image

      MartieG aka 'survivoryea' 

      7 years ago from Jersey Shore

      Love the humor! Fun lens :>)

    • stacy mcdaniel profile image

      stacy mcdaniel 

      7 years ago

      Love It! Funny stuff!

    • ismeedee profile image


      7 years ago

      Wickedly funny lens! And I love the 'Stop wars'!!! Excellent!

    • BunnyFabulous profile image


      7 years ago from Central Florida

      These are hysterical! I like Jabba Kitteh. :)

    • KandDMarketing profile image


      7 years ago

    • Karli McClane profile image

      Karli McClane 

      7 years ago from USA

      Fun lens - great job!

    • KandH profile image


      7 years ago

      Lol - I'm not really a Star Wars fan but this is great, thanks!

    • HaleySchaeffer LM profile image

      HaleySchaeffer LM 

      7 years ago

      Great job! I got a few good laughs out of your lens.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Love this! Do they have "Squid Love"? No longer feeling like a scruffy nerf herder after getting together with my kind here! Indeed. May the farce be with you!

    • gardendesignsan profile image


      7 years ago

      LOL Much more fun than a barrel of ewaks

    • joannalynn lm profile image

      joannalynn lm 

      7 years ago

      Just went back and watched the Jedi Gym. Hilarious!

    • joannalynn lm profile image

      joannalynn lm 

      7 years ago

      Have you ever seen the Monty Python parody? It's a little too bloody to post here, but is really funny!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Very entertaining - thanks

    • livinglargeandh profile image


      7 years ago

      What an awesome piece of work. Funny, creative, and well-done.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      How funny, thanks for the laugh....

    • RedShoesGirl profile image


      7 years ago

      this really made me have done my day better.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      loved the smartass vader -

    • profile image


      7 years ago


    • Mistl profile image


      7 years ago

      A ton of fun Star Wars stuff here. I had some good laughs

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      hilarious!!! Join the dark side- and get a free cookie

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      this was a very awesome site! i really loved the MTV sketch

    • Steve Dizmon profile image

      Steve Dizmon 

      7 years ago from Nashville, TN

      Great Lens. My favorite of the entire page is Darth Vader in line with a Lightsaber to see Luke Skywalker. Smooth, Real Smooth. Lots of fun.

    • Cari Kay 11 profile image


      7 years ago

      Funny, funny, funny. My thirteen year old son loves Star Wars. He is really going to enjoy this page. Thank you!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Very amusing. The jedi gym cracked me up. Ah that Darth Vader.

    • agoofyidea profile image


      7 years ago

      I laughed and laughed. Great job on this lens.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      AWESOME site! Love it and keep up the good work :) And May the Force be with you ;)

    • LissaRhys profile image


      7 years ago

      It's been awhile since I've laughed out loud at a site - thanks. :) Great lens, and as a SW fan of many years, I must say: Bravo!

    • majorzolz profile image


      7 years ago

      Oh man this is great!

    • jstarley profile image


      7 years ago

      Ha ha! I absolutely loved this! I laughed the while reading the whole lens! Thanks!

    • CNelson01 profile image

      Chuck Nelson 

      7 years ago from California

      Well done!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Enjoyed seeing this article, funny and humorous and all in the name of star wars!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Mate, definitely not too long. I love Star Wars and appreciate a good read about it. Thank you very much!!

    • angelaedwards11 profile image


      7 years ago

      good lans and i love star wars

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      This is great. Love Star Wars... :)

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Awesome lens! Really funny! I love Star Wars...:)

    • WriterJanis2 profile image


      7 years ago

      Very fun lens. Great humor.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Not a big Star Wars fan but some of this is pretty funny!

    • goo2eyes lm profile image

      goo2eyes lm 

      7 years ago

      very humorous lens. you told them all.

    • fugeecat lm profile image

      fugeecat lm 

      7 years ago

      These are awesome! I'm a huge Star Wars fan and there were a couple jokes on here that I haven't seen before.

    • creativeinc lm profile image

      creativeinc lm 

      7 years ago

      Princess Lea!

      My all time favorite film character.Great fun here.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Really cool! Stop wars - start humor. :)

    • darciefrench lm profile image

      darciefrench lm 

      7 years ago

      I was thinking, this star wars humor never ends - but in a good way, thanks for the chuckles :)

    • chezchazz profile image


      7 years ago from New York

      Very funny. Blessed on the Squid Angel Labor Day Bus Tour.

    • brbrooks profile image


      7 years ago

      Great lens, my husband is still laughing

    • Close2Art LM profile image

      Close2Art LM 

      7 years ago

      awesome lens

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Great lens, made me laugh a lot!

      Nice work,

      Robin :)

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Hilarious! I never knew SW could be so funny. How did I miss all this interwebs stuff?

    • mountainstevo profile image


      7 years ago

      This is hilarious stuff!

    • Dianna206 profile image


      7 years ago

      Spaceballs. 'Nuff said. Loved this lens! Hilarious!

    • tvyps profile image

      Teri Villars 

      7 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      Always liked the movie "Hardware Wars"...saw it first time at a shorts festival. Cool lens.

    • ChrisDay LM profile image

      ChrisDay LM 

      8 years ago

      Great stuff! Fabulous. Have you seen the vid - deathstar canteen?

    • bkarsono profile image


      8 years ago

      Wow.... what awesome lens. I enjoyed it. I love how the economy has affected Darth Vedar. Poor sod.. :)

    • pheonix76 profile image


      8 years ago from WNY

      Great lens!!! I really liked the stormtrooper regrets poster, lol. That hello kitty Darth is just wrong!


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