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New Challenges for the New Father

Updated on May 07, 2016
MsDora profile image

MsDora, Certified Christian Counselor, specializes in women's issues. That includes appreciating and empowering the men in their lives.

Photo by Alex from Ithaca
Photo by Alex from Ithaca | Source

(1) Be Awe-Struck

Remember the first time you saw your child? Perhaps you stared with your mouth wide open, or you took a deep breath and whispered, “My Goodness!” You saw your special gift from God, “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) and you were amazed.

Your child will not remember that first response, but it would be great for him to see a repeat--several times over.

Continue to be excited when your eyes meet, when he utters baby gibberish, when he learns to wave good-bye. Throughout your lifetime, fill your child’s need to be loved and to feel special. Continue to be awe-struck at his accomplishments.


(2) Be Available

Your new life-as-usual is not the same as it was before the baby. Write him in on your schedule, which means you have to lessen time with someone or something else. Be available to share baby-care with your wife—to bottle feed, to change diapers, to teach him words, to play peek-a-boo, to show him that you are a part of his life. Create an early bond with your child, and discover early how to earn his trust. He has only one father and that is true for life.


(3) Be His Example

Demonstrate the kind of character you want your son to become. It is still likely that he will do less of what you say, and more of what you do, because children learn best by imitation. He will learn from you the habit of morning prayer, evening prayer, grace before meals, what to eat and drink, and how to relate to his mother. As he grows older, he will listen as you say where you’re going and how you can be reached, and he will copy your habit. He will learn his codes of conduct by watching you.


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(4) Be His Hero

You are your child’s first hero, not because of your achievements or your rank in society, but because you offered him the first image to look up to. You have an impact on how long you remain his hero. If he does not change his impression of you, you may be his superman for life. Your duty is not to be his only hero, but to remain on his list of heroes—heroes who steer him and support him on the path toward his God-given purpose, heroes who show him to overcome challenges with innate skill and talent, connected to a Supernatural power.


(5) Be Loving

Don’t only talk about your love; demonstrate it. The God kind of love includes patience, kindness, selflessness, humility, courtesy, forgiveness, fairness and trust. This kind of love reaps good results. If your dealings with your child are filtered through this mix of virtues, you child will know that he is loved, and will also learn how to love.

  • He will see love in your smiles.
  • He will feel love in your touch.
  • He will taste love when you spoon-feed him.
  • He will hear love through your tone of voice.
  • He will smell love in the scent of your embrace.
  • He will understand love the way you love his mother.


(6) Be Responsible

Without training, your child will grow wild; with training he will become a disciplined, productive citizen. Teach him good manners, obedience, cooperation and interpersonal skills necessary to get along with others. Teach him both to lead and to follow. Begin early to nurture his strengths and consider goals for his personal achievement. Help him discover his purpose and fuel his drive to pursue it. Take responsibility for his spiritual as well as his academic training. Commit to supporting him in every way you can, to become the Masterpiece that he was designed to be.


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(7) Be Consistent

You can judge how important a habit is by how consistently you do it. Feeding time, grocery shopping and health checkups usually happen as planned; so should play time, conversation time, prayer time, cleanup time and anything else that you want your child to consider important. The values, the habits, the activities that you want to form the basic structure of his life have to be taught repeatedly. Be clear about what is acceptable and what is not; and be consistent with your approval and disapproval.


(8) Be Forgiving

Forgiveness, though a by-product of love, needs special mention because without it the other by-products may not happen. You will not hold it against your son if at two months he soils his diaper as soon as you put him in the car seat. You will not call him names if at nine months he drops his sippy cup on the carpet. You forgive him with the knowledge that he needs to be trained, not to be punished.

Some of the mistakes that children make simply mean that the parent has more training to do. Create an atmosphere in which your child expects that his faults will receive your forgiveness, followed by your training. Also forgive yourself (i.e. accept God’s forgiveness) when you think you failed in any aspect of parenting.


(9) Be Happy

The stresses of life take their toll, and ill-feelings will pay their visits. Teach your child early that happiness is a choice, and that circumstances do not control us. Say when you’re tired; at the same time, show him that tired and grumpy are not synonyms. You may be hungry after the trip on a long road where there are no sandwich shops; still take the time to share a hi-five and a laugh. Let your home be the place where positive attitudes take precedence over the pressures of life. The smile you search for on his infant face is no more important than the smile you want to see him wear as a teenager or young adult.


(10) Be Prayerful

My Dear Son, these 10 challenges are for real. There are more challenges in reality than we can put in print. Your human strength and skill are not enough to maintain the Good Dad profile your child deserves to see. You need Supernatural help.

Live in an attitude of prayer concerning your child. Speak with God in your heart before you make your decisions, before you leave him and while you’re away.

Which do you consider the most important challenge for a new dad?

See results

Let God parent you, and rely on the wisdom He teaches you to parent your child effectively.

Be prayerful and confident that “He who has begun a good work in you will complete it ” (Philippians 1:6).


Summary of Challenges

  1. Be Awe-Struck
  2. Be Available
  3. Be His Example
  4. Be His Hero
  5. Be Loving
  6. Be Responsible
  7. Be Consistent
  8. Be Forgiving
  9. Be Happy
  10. Be Prayerful

To be most effective, qualify everyone of these challenges with the adverb continually.


© 2013 Dora Isaac Weithers

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    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 3 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Great Hub.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

      You had me grinning on number one...be awestruck! No kidding! That little child is a miracle and a father should be in awe. Great list of suggestions, MsDora!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks, Eric. Hope my son thinks so.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Billy, glad to make you smile--or grin. Being awestruck may not readily come to mind, but children love to see it.

    • samazi profile image

      Masimba Mukichi 3 years ago from United Kingdom

      Brilliant write, thanks for sharing. Indeed a daddy should be available for the precious gift - the baby.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Samazi, that's an important challenge, given the busy schedules that daddies have. Thanks for affirming how precious a gift the baby is.

    • profile image

      Vickiw 3 years ago

      MsDora, this is a delightful Hub, and I hope lots of Daddies read it and are inspired to be the best they can be!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks, Vicki. I have the same hope-first for my son, but also for all the young men who are serious about effective parenting.

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 3 years ago from Wales

      Interesting and useful.

      Voted up.

      Eddy.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thank you, Eiddwen, for your vote and your kind comment. I appreciate you.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 3 years ago from Shelton

      MsDora this is such a great idea for a hub and they are all of equal importance and of equal value voted awesome and useful!!!!

    • profile image

      Rayne123 3 years ago

      Great hub, funny I was led to this hub

      It sure makes a lot of sense that any dad/mother should know and teach

    • MsDora profile image
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      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Frank, thanks for your comment. We think alike on this one.

    • MsDora profile image
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      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Rayne, glad you were led to the hub, and also glad for you kind comment.

    • drmiddlebrook profile image

      Sallie B Middlebrook PhD 3 years ago from Texas, USA

      Great Hub, MsDora. If only all fathers, young and older, could see and read this. Mothers-to-be need to give these as a sort of "instruction manual" to fathers-to-be. What a great job you did in conceptualizing and executing this. Well written, beautifully phrased, well presented. Voted useful, awesome, and beautiful.

    • MsDora profile image
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      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks Dr. Middlebrook for your very kind and encouraging comments. An instruction manual sounds good to me.

    • khmazz profile image

      Kristen Mazzola 3 years ago from South Florida

      I have to say that this might be one of my favorite hubs I have ever read! All of it is so true! Thank you for writing and sharing something so heartfelt and true! LOVED IT!!

    • profile image

      ignugent17 3 years ago

      This is very helpful. I would surely share this hub with my friends. :-)

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Ignugent, thanks for commenting and sharing with your friends. I'm happy that you find my article helpful.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Khmazz, happy that you like this article so much. It is written from my heart to my son who has recently become a new father. I really want him to do a good job of parenting.

    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 3 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      Beautiful and useful write Ms Dora. Thanks. Voted up.

      that 1st picture reminds me of how I held him when he was born.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Rajan, glad to bring you a pleasant memory. Thanks for your support.

    • alocsin profile image

      alocsin 3 years ago from Orange County, CA

      A good friend of mine has just become a new dad. I'll give him this hub because he needs all the help he can get. Voting this Up and Useful.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks, alocsin. You're the good friend--to the new dad and to me. I appreciate you.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      A great dad is the one who spends time with his child and who won't forget the first time experiences you have chose n an interesting hub title voted up!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Yea, DDE. We think alike concerning the challenges for the new dad. Availability and the memories of the time they spend together are priceless.

    • Kasman profile image

      Kas 3 years ago from Bartlett, Tennessee

      Ms Dora, I'm hoping I can hit on all cylinders when I have my first sometime! I especially love the part where you talk about building character in them. I remember my grandfather bowing his head in silent grace before meals to The Lord growing up and it affected me. Helped me get to Jesus years later in life after living as a reprobate for a long time. Great hub! Voting this up!

    • MsDora profile image
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      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Kasman, so glad to meet someone like you here on HubPages! That's a wonderful tribute to your grandfather. You've got the right attitude toward parenting and I pray for your success.

    • Insightful Tiger profile image

      Insightful Tiger 3 years ago

      MsDora, you have put up a great hub with very good advice for fathers. If every father and mother followed this advice we'd all be a lot better for it! Thanks for sharing sister!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Insightful, thanks for your encouraging comment. I appreciate you.

    • sunkentreasure profile image

      BERNARD LEVINE 3 years ago from RUIMSIG, SOUTH AFRICA

      PRECIOUS CHILDREN By BERNARD LEVINE

      Bless your children with the power of prayer

      Celebrate their uniqueness

      Feed them encouragement and inspiration

      and let them feel they are greatly loved.

      Teach your children the beauty of kindness

      Enrich them with the wonders of nature

      Fill their hearts with joyful melody

      and always be their friend.

      Clothe your children in goodness

      Make their world full of nice surprises

      Help them to follow their dreams

      and thank God they came into your life.

      © Bernard Levine

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Sunken, thanks for your participation. This is good additional counsel for the new dad.

    • weestro profile image

      Weestro 3 years ago from Virginia

      Love this Ms Dora, and I will strive to follow. Do you mind if I post a link to this on my blog?

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Please do, Weestro. Thanks for the compliment.

    • ARUN KANTI profile image

      ARUN KANTI CHATTERJEE 3 years ago from KOLKATA

      Thanks for the helpful tips for the new father- a phase that combines happiness with lot of responsibility.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Arun, that's a meaningful way of saying it. Thanks for your input.

    • SAM ELDER profile image

      SAM ELDER 3 years ago from Home

      Great hub :)

    • Lady_E profile image

      Elena 3 years ago from London, UK

      Absolutely beautiful to read and many will find good advice from this. I will tweet it. For me the most important is prayer because through it, God will reveal how a father should do certain things (wisdom) and sometimes even reveal things that his son might be going through. (parents can't be around their kids 24/7)

      I love this.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Lady E, you have some very good ideas. I appreciate your input.

    • profile image

      Photographer 3 years ago

      Dear MS Dora, I am the photographer and creator of the first image on your blog post on this site, this is a copyrighted image that you are using without a permission; furthermore the baby and daddy represented in this picture have not authorized this kind of use so you also do not have the permission to use it from the people in the photo as well. Please remove it.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Done! I apologize.

    • profile image

      Photographer 3 years ago

      Thanks!

    • Hezekiah profile image

      Hezekiah 3 years ago from Japan

      Thank you very much for the advice.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thank you for reading and commenting. I wrote it specifically for my son who is a new father; and happy that other men find it useful.

    • pstraubie48 profile image

      Patricia Scott 22 months ago from sunny Florida

      Awesome awesome and awesome....such a well organized and thoughtfully expressed hub...fathers every where should read this.

      Angels are on the way to you. ps

      Voted up++++

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 22 months ago from The Caribbean

      Patricia, thank you for your very encouraging comment. Thanks always for the angels; I need them today.

    • profile image

      samazi 22 months ago

      Brilliant piece,a must have manual for all aspiring parents,you have nailed it.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 22 months ago from The Caribbean

      Samazi, you're very kind. Hope you own writing is doing well. Happy Father's Day (if it applies).

    • word55 profile image

      Word 22 months ago from Chicago

      Very, very nice Dora, that 1st son and daughter will always be special. Your hub is right on the money. I shall have another blessed Father's Day this year! Thank you for acknowledging dads so well!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 22 months ago from The Caribbean

      Well, Word since you already decided that your Fathers Day will be special, I can only wish you many more celebrations of the day. Thanks so much for reading and giving your feedback.

    • Lady_E profile image

      Elena 21 months ago from London, UK

      I stopped by to read this again. It's Fathers Day in UK this weekend. I am tweeting it and believe it will inspire many Fathers and Fathers to be.

      Have a lovely weekend. :-)

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 21 months ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks, Lady E. Hope your Fathers Day celebration is lots of fun!

    • VioletteRose profile image

      VioletteRose 21 months ago from Chicago

      This is really very helpful, especially for new parents. Thanks so much for sharing!

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 21 months ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks Violette. Happy that someone could be helped. I appreciate your comment.

    • suraj punjabi profile image

      suraj punjabi 9 months ago from jakarta

      Beautiful hub, I can relate to all your points quite well. I am a father of a 2 year old girl. And I find all that you have written to be so true. I think I am going to bookmark it for future reference. Thank you.

    • MsDora profile image
      Author

      Dora Isaac Weithers 9 months ago from The Caribbean

      Thank you and Happy Fathers Day, Suraj. You encourage me.

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 9 months ago from Dubai

      A great hub for things that a new father should do. "Some of the mistakes that children make simply mean that the parent has more training to do" - so important and many times as parents we forget this

    • MsDora profile image
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      Dora Isaac Weithers 9 months ago from The Caribbean

      Vellur, thanks for your input. Hope fathers won't forget just because fathers day is gone.

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