8 Kind and Effective Tips for Parenting a Fussy Baby
Being the proud mommy of two, I know just how unique each baby of mine was from their sibling. Every parent knows that babies ( especially newborns ) cry. be often consoled by a bottle or being held. When our little ones don't feel well they will scream louder and cry longer, just like adults will. As time goes by our "special bundles of joy" will begin to relax more, ultimately giving us some much needed relief. But as parents we can't help but notice the baby that seems to wail and complain constantly, and secretly feel sorry for their unfortunate parents. I admit openly that my second child ( who happens to be the apple of my eye ) was this type of child. There were times when our days felt like weeks and I began to question myself and if I was even fit to be a parent. My anxiety began to grow as did my anger, and I felt like the world's walls were slowly closing in on me. At this point I knew the time had arrived to find solutions I could actively implement into our routine together.
Eliminate Any Health Problems
All new parents want to make sure their newborn is healthy.There are many problems that could contribute to a child's physical or emotional discomfort. Personally, I would never forgive myself for not tending to a health issue or not taking the proper measures in prevention. There are a variety of remedies that are available to help this baby, and if administered properly and as directed, there is a good chance this fussy baby could become a joyful one!
Possible medical causes for fussy baby
Cow's milk intolerance
Urinary tract infection
Foreign body in the eye
Hair tourniquet syndrome
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The most efficient way to relieve my own tension was to give in and ask for help. I am blessed to have a partner (In our case, my husband) that I could lean on for relief. We would often pass him back and forth until he was fast asleep. There were times when I felt like I was a failure for doing this, just because my husband worked a lot. However, after I learned to be humble and accepted that I couldn't do it all myself, I discovered that going to my husband was the direction I should have taken from the beginning. I have a couple close friends that are single parents that have used this method also, but in a different way. In order to get himself through tough child-rearing times, a friend of mine would stay with his mother for weeks at a time, allowing himself time to rest when he was at his limit. I kept telling myself over and over , that asking for help did not make me a failure, and that my baby's well-being took precedence over my own pride in every situation.
The easiest way to quiet the screaming baby is to go to another location different from the one you and your child have been in. I frequently observed that when my baby's crying spells would persist, we seemed to almost be stuck in the same room where the crying had begun. Taking him into the hallway of my tiny apartment complex ,or out on our deck, would actually distract him and his tears would turn into a curiosity about the "outside" world.
Take a Car Ride
Taking the baby for a car ride is almost the same as changing scenery, but I understand that not everyone has a vehicle, so using a stroller to take a walk will frequently work as well .My own mother would tell me that she often did this with me a baby and toddler. There is something about the motion of a car or a stroller that will usually put a baby to sleep or relax them.
Listen to Music or Read to Your Little One
My son loves music! Most people that agree that music soothes and speaks to the soul, and is believe that it is "the universal language." Understanding the words to a song is a part of what some of enjoy music, but there are millions of songs in which just the instruments or sounds make it special. By playing the radio or listening to our favorite playlist, I watch my boy's mood improve immediately. Reading to your child can provide similar results quickly, I feel the intimate act of reading will seem to make a child happy. The attention paid to the the little one makes them feel special, almost like there is no one in the world other than the two of you.
Put Yourself in Your Baby's Place
Empathy is something very hard to truly practice. From listening to child psychologists, I know that babies cry not only because they are unhappy or in need of something, but that they have no language to verbalize these concerns. There pitch and volume varies with each set of tears. Being able to indentify each demand your baby throws at you. By doing that it well determine your sense of urgency. Also I remind myself that my child came from me, and their pain is like mine. I attempt to refrain from saying things like , "what is wrong ?" and "Why won't you just let up?" When I hear myself out loud I realize my tone of voice sounds judgemental and mean. The last thing in the world I to be is a mean mommy.
I will admit without arguing, that not everyone agrees with this method. However, there is enough professional advice that confirms this won't scar or damage your baby once they reach a certain age. I must make it clear that I am NOT suggesting neglecting a baby. Tantrums are normal, we as adults exhibit these behaviors as well, and taking a minute by ourselves will sometimes do the trick. This can be done by going into another room where the child is in a safe atmosphere, letting her cry for five minutes at time, and then checking in to let her know that she hasn't been abandoned. After doing this for awhile, my baby would eventually fall asleep and stay asleep for a much longer than normal nap. This would confirm my thoughts that maybe exhaustion played a role in his tears.
Crying it Out Alone
Would you let your baby( over 6 months ) "cry it out" for short spans of time?
A negative action draws a negative reaction, just like a positivity attracts more of the same. This is tied into using a happy tone of voice or not showing frustration in things that are natural habits of a young one. Babies make messes, they obviously cry and of course do things daily that drive us insane. But reminding ourselves of this and actively attempt to stay positive is extremely important in a happy family and baby. Loud noises and yelling, anger and fighting can make for a sad atmosphere, putting stress on a child.
- I know this is by far easier said than done.There is a lot involved with being a new mom, and suffering from postpartum depression or "the baby blues". This is a real and serious issue, not to be taken lightly. From my own experience with post partum depression, I found that being positive took time and much more. In my unbearable moments I would try to pray, and really believed that I could find serenity. I just kept reminding myself of how I couldn't possibly be doing my new baby any good but showing my rotten mood. When I was upset, inevitably so was baby. I made prayer a daily habit and with that came a change for the better. (For a person who doesn't pray, meditation has a similar result) As cliche as this may sound, what harm can be done?
Help with Postpartum Depression
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For more on Postpartum view this site. If you need resources for help with understanding exactly what PPD is, this a good place to start. There are symptoms, treatment options, a PPD quiz, and contact info for help.