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A Day in the Life of Emily 2 - Choices - Abortion or the Gift of Life
Abortion or the Gift of Life
It is my belief that abortion and the gift of life should not be entwined in the same sentence but that is exactly what I have done. I don't know how to voice the sentiments I feel. No doubt what I am about to write will offend and upset some people. But I have to put it out there - for Emily.
All of us are given choices at various stages along the path that represents our life. There are different roads we can follow at any step of the way. What is important to understand at the beginning of the journey is that those first crucial steps toward one way or another may represent outcomes that will ultimately lead to significant repercussions that come about because of those decisions.
Eleven Week Ultrasound
This is the Beginning of my Journey
It was a few weeks after the eleven week ultrasound that I was told my baby had a chromosome abnormality. This left me with choices. I could proceed with the pregnancy and hope that all may turn out well or, and this was the point that was stressed, I could, no should terminate the pregnancy.
There are possibly as many women who feel as I do about abortion as there are those who have a strong view toward the opposite option or opinion. While I accept that it is a divided issue I cannot accept flippant reasons for ending a possible life. But it is not for me to judge or determine what is a flippant excuse. All I know is I am pregnant. I have given birth before and not only know but fully appreciate the wonder of introducing another life into this world.
My doctor had advised strongly in favour of having an amniocentesis test after the ultrasound. He couldn't say for sure but thought our baby may have Down Syndrome. Did we need to know for sure? We already knew there was every chance of this baby having a chromosome abnormality. What difference could it make knowing what it was? Because of the risks of termination I chose not to have this test.
Not everyone agreed with my decision and put forward a number of questions before the next doctor’s appointment. I was confronted with questions that perhaps for someone else may have changed their decision. But it was as my sister had stated on that first day, abortion is not an option, for me.
“Have you really thought this through?
“Let’s say the baby is born with Down syndrome. What happens as it gets older and you two both get older?”
“How are you going to manage looking after a child with a disability?"
“It’s one thing to carry a baby around, what about when that baby develops into a child or even a young adult? You would be looking at things like feeding, changing nappies for years.”
My only response to all the questions had to be, “I know, I’ve thought about all of that. To me, that’s just what you do as a parent isn’t it?”
What is the Doppler Flow?
- Doppler Flow Studies
Doppler flow is a type of ultrasound that uses sound waves to measure the flow of blood through a blood vessel.
There is no Guarantee For the Perfect Child
In a perfect world, babies are born without any abnormalities. We don’t have the luxury of that with this pregnancy, so, what, we’re supposed to say, well we didn’t get the perfect baby we’ll just throw this one out and try again? This line of thinking does not sit well with me.
We are at the hospital and two weeks before the baby is due and the Doppler Flow is of concern. I am told to report to the maternity ward where a midwife hooks me up to an ECG to get a better look at the baby's heartbeat. After an hour several doctors have come and gone before a decision is made. This baby needs to be born. There is distress. I am distressed. The baby's father is distressed but most important of all, the baby is stressed.
I have always been such a supporter of natural child birth, but now I am being faced with the prospect of this, my third baby needing to be delivered by way of Caesarian Section. We have an emergency situation. If I want my baby born alive I have to hand the controls over to the medical profession.
- A Day in the Life of Emily 1 - The Pregnancy
Follow the pregnancy of a woman as she unfolds the dilemnas, risks and uncertainties of being pregnant in her forties. From first trimester to final trimester she is faced with the possibilites of having a baby born with chromosome abnormalities.
- A Day in the Life of Emily 2 - Choices - Abortion or the Gift of Life
It is my belief that abortion and the gift of life should not be entwined in the same sentence but that is exactly what I have done. I don't know how to voice the sentiments I feel. No doubt what I am about to...
- A Day in the Life of Emily 3 - The Birth Day - Natural Delivery or Caesarean
After having given birth by way of natural delivery on two previous occasions, the thought of a Caesarean delivery was not only alien to me but abhorrent. But with my third pregnancy this was to be considered,...
- A Day in the Life of Emily 4 - The Intensive Care Unit
All the anxious months of waiting for a baby to arrive in normal circumstances are hard enough. For my third pregnancy there were so many trips to the hospital for extra tests, that I now felt the place was...
- A Day in the Life of Emily 5 - The Special Care Nursery and Babies with Special Needs
It can be heartwrenching for any parent having to visit their newborn baby in the Special Care Nursery but the staff make the experience less frightening. Their expertise is in looking after babies with special needs.
- A Day in the Life of Emily 6 - The Diagnosis, not Down Syndrome
Following a pregnancy fraught with every possibility of having a baby born with a chromosomal abnormality, the diagnosis has finally arrived. The good news; our baby does not have down Syndrome – the bad news is something much worse. Edwards Syndrome
Emily's Story Available on Amazon
© 2010 Karen Wilton