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A Diary Of A Teenage-Mother
A Poem: A Little D.I.A.R.Y
This little book was Designed to hold Information Acquired by it's writers.
Most likely their words would be transpired into their innermost desires that they have inquired but sometimes it takes a little Reminder to devote more notes into it daily, monthly & Yearly binders.
I Want My Diary To Be An Open Book For Young & New Moms To Look Into
Dear Young & New Moms, I would like for you as the reader to take the message, that I'm given to you today as a token of love. I want you to know that, I've once walked in your same shoes but I had to take different steps to get where I wanted to go and where I needed to be. Please look at your motherly struggles as an obstacle that you will be able to overcome and face with honor and gratitude. You're not alone, please be open minded when you read my story.
I Am Not Advocating Teen Pregnancy
My story is meant to help teens or new moms. I'll repeat it again so you know that my story is told for the sole purpose to help others.
#1 Obstacle: What Kind Of Judgement Was I Faced With?
In the Summer of 1991, I met a young man from New York City. We met at a corner store near my apartment. He was here visiting his family for a few months or so. Our relationship started-off very quick and strong when I was a high-school. He was the one who stole my heart from the very start. It seem like our relationship became inseparable after several months of dating. My mother wasn't on board with our relationship from the very beginning but once she got word of my pregnancy things immediately changed.
I knew that I was selfish at the time by not being upfront with my mother. I knew that I seriously hurt her feelings by not saying anything to her in the very beginning of my pregnancy. I hid my pregnancy out of shame.
My pregnancy was perceived as a huge disappointment in the eye's of my mother and my other family members. It was a heartbreaking time for me. I remember it like it was yesterday but let's get back to my story in the 90s it was considered to be a norm for young ladies to become pregnant. Mostly all the girls would dropped out of school while others went to school without any judgments.
But, however, I didn't see it that way. I saw judgment lurking in the eye's of my peers, teachers, friends, and anyone who loved me. I, always thought whenever any women became pregnant it was supposed to be a time of celebration not a time of judgement, but judgement found me. Throughout my pregnancy, I was hit with so much negativity, but those words somehow gave me strength to prove people wrong and how they perceived a young pregnant women.
Negative Words That Flooded My Mind Daily:
You'll never become a good mom?
A child can't raise a child?
You and your children will never finish high school?
Positive Words I Repeated Daily:
I will be the best mom that I can be.
I'd prove that a young women like myself will be able to raise a child.
I will make sure that me and my children will finish school.
#10 Questions That Ran Through My Head At The Time?
#1.What kind of judgement will I face? #2. How would my mother and family react? #3. How will I raise this child? #4. What can I offer another life? #5. What job will hire a teenage mother?#6. Will I have to put my future plans on hold for the sake of my child? #7. Did I just throw away my dreams?#8. Will I be able to finish high school? #9. Am I ready to face the unknown? #10 All the sports I'd played will I be able to still play them?
Understanding The Importances Of Getting The Right Help
Becoming pregnant in high school was the hardest thing for me to face but I knew that I had to put my education first without any doubt. One day, me and my boyfriend were talking about what kind of self-improvements we needed to accomplish so we can help ourselves and better our futures.
Our conversation went so well, that I decided the following day to go see my counsel at my school and see what type of classes the high school had offered. She suggested, for me to take some free parenting classes and she said that those hourly sessions would show me how to be a nurturing mother.
I agree and took the parenting classes which workout great for me, I saw things in a different light with the advices of so many wonderful counselors that were given to me in the program.The program offered an on-going support and that extra support gave me, the confidences that I was looking for. Plus the hands-on and day-to-day help from my mother, and other family support. Please know that these is support out there for you.. you just have to go and find it.
Make Your Vote Count
Have You Ever Been Faced With Some Of These Struggles Or Obstacles?
#2 Obstacles: Going Into Labor Early
By the time, I made it into my seventh month. I was having bad contraction and I didn't even know how that felt. I had a lot of back pains at the time, so I took a hot bath twice until I couldn't stand the pain. In no time, I was rushed into the emergency room and found out that I was in labor and that I was seven centimeters open.
Even my doctors at the time did not have the proper equipment to receive a premature baby, they told me before I start pushing or bearing down. That they might have to air-lifted me to a different hospital that had the right equipment for me and my baby. But, that didn't happen because the baby was coming to fast so they had to do whatever they can to help me and my child. When my son was born he was immediately put into an incubator and the doctors gave out strict orders that only our immediate family were able to see him.
My Mother suggested, that I breastfeed the baby, so he would gain his weight faster and become stronger with the mother's milk, which is considered the most healthiest milk on the planet. His father and I, were at the hospital day-in and night-out making sure that our new baby got the attention and care he desperately needed. When the doctors were saying that he will be coming home within a month. We spend longer days and nights with him and that helped our baby gain his weight faster.
He was released from the care of the hospital sooner than they expected. He was home within a week. My dear readers, if you're going through this type of struggle as of now, I understand the pain and I wish could be there to hold your hand but a little word of encouragement is all I have (don't cry but dry your weeping eyes because in time... everything is going be just fine) and for those of you that aren't, be glad because it's a tough battle to face.
Do You Know A New Mom That Could Use Some Good Motherly Advice?
A Poem: Who Could It Effect?
Baby blues isn't something new, it's something that new mom's go through but I though you knew how it could affect you and your baby too.
Don't cry and believe those ridiculous lies that are hidden way deep down inside but know those ties that have been bind way deep down inside to create new life wants you to stay alive.
#3 Obstacle: The Baby-Blues
The week that my baby was in the hospital. I would come home crying because I felted such unbelievable guilt that I had left him at the hospital by himself.
It was definitely, the baby-blues because I thought that my baby was lonely and that I had abandoned him. My dear readers, please know that baby blues and post-depression are considered the same thing and it can effect any women at anytime. So, becareful and know the symptoms and how to find the proper help whenever it occurs. History as shown that women that have gone through this type of situation have either killed themselves or the children. Here's my suggestions:
- Talk about it to someone you trust
- Gain some understanding about the symptoms
- Get professional help if you don't know how to deal with it
- Touch-bases with someone who went through it and overcame it
#4 Obstacle: Birth-Control Pills
I was introduced to birth control pills by my primary doctor and started taking them daily but it's a known fact that it doesn't always work. I found that out the hard way with two pregnancies after that the fact. I had my daughter and a year later, I had my son.
After back-to-back pregnancies, I talked to my doctors to tie my tubes but their policy didn't allowed it go through because they said, I was too young for that to happen. I had to wait, until I was in my thirties to get it done. So, please make better choices when it comes to protecting yourself. My dear friend, make sure if your taking birth control pills that you know all the side-effects.
#5 Obstacle: Juggling School, Work, And Motherhood
Whatever decisions I've made throughout my life, I made sure that it involved school, work, and raising my children. While I juggled those three things for years it taught me valuable lessons and kept me ground it.
It took dedication and time, but I graduated from high school and decided to get into the workforce full-time instead of heading off to college. It wasn't easy for me but I'm thankful that mostly all of my employers gave me a chance to prove my work ethic. I've been in the customer services industry from my teenage years until now. I'm glad that the companies I came to gave me a shot and help me establish a better lifestyle for me and my family.
#6 Obstacle: I Wasn't Able To Do The Things I Used To Do
I couldn't do what an average teenage girl could do anymore. But, however, I wasn't an average teenage girl. I was considered a tomboy because I had the ability to play any sport better than any boy on my block or neighborhood. What hurt me the most was not being able to play the sports that I fell in love with as a child, which was softball, football, tennis, and any type of full-contact sports. Most of the average teens I knew would hangout with friends after school or on the weekends and but not me. My time was spent on the field playing football or softball after school and the weekends, if I wasn't working.
Most Teenage Moms Or New Moms Are Single Ones
I was blessed to have a good man by my side every step of the way. For those of you who are single and battling parenthood on your own I commend you. I know it's a hard task because I am a by product of a single parent household and I know the battles single mom's have to face.
A Message: Extra-Support
Don't underestimate your motherhood just learn from your mistakes and work on improving yourselves. I want you to know that I'm your biggest supporter. That's why I wrote this article for you and others that need that extra-add support.
#7 Obstacle: I Had To Become Their Number One Teacher
Being a mother is no easy task but it's well-worth it. I had the pleasure of teaching my kids, how to walk, talk, and how to use the potty. Many parents don't get rewarded those kind of privileges to watch their children go through those growing stages, but I other hand, I'm grateful that I had the chance to witness all of those's precious moments.
I found myself being their number one teacher showing them things that I've learned as a child. We've had mountains of ups and downs but that's apart of learning anything. I had fun showing them how to play games, read, write, and how to behave in public.
At times, when I saw their little problems being my big problems and I've tried as hard as I could to give them the right outlets. I remember one time when one of my kids couldn't read very well for more than half the school year or so. I quickly made some adjustments and decided to teach all of them something new by combining traditional games with their school work, it had some learning curves, but it work. I also had to get some professional help to teach them different skills.
My husband and I, provided them with the best learning tools they needed for school, sports, and any extra activities they wanted to be apart of.
Dear readers, if you see signs of struggles in their school work get them the extra-add help they need and it will work out for you and them in the long run.
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