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Love: A Mother-Daughter Legacy

Updated on February 23, 2015
CrisSp profile image

CrisSp is your Emergency Specialist at 37 thousand feet. A writer without a niche. Wonderwoman consumed by wanderlust!

Before you start reading, I strongly recommend that you watch this feel good (true story) clip ~

There's nothing like a mama-hug -A. Radici
There's nothing like a mama-hug -A. Radici | Source

“An older mother who is tired of mothering has the right to retire, but not withdraw, from the job.” -

Motherhood-it is a timeless calling, a lifelong mission that requires a lot of patience and flexibility. It is one incredible role that will certainly change a woman's life forever.

A mother and daughter relationship could be complex and at times, there is a roller coaster of emotions in between but once built is all worth the ride and once achieved will create a rich and loving real relationship that can last a lifetime.

How often do we ignore the beautiful presence of our mother because of peer pressure and judgment or plain and simple, selfish desire? How often do we doubt our daughter not because we don’t really trust them but mother instinct tell us otherwise? So, there goes some frictions in the relationship.

Because of their tough role as a mother, we tend to completely miss the forest for the trees and often resent them for providing us life, instead of thanking them for the gift of life.

It is a painful thing to know that despite being raised with as much love as our mother’s can give, we still put them as our scapegoat for everything that is wrong in our lives and sometimes even call them, “the monster” or “bloody dramatic mother”. More often than not, they are misunderstood and seldom get what they need and deserve as a mother, for they tend to give than to receive. However, it is also painful to see that there are abused children, abandoned children and children longing for mother's love.

It is fulfilling to have a great mother and daughter relationship. The journey though is not always smooth and never without hurdles. Mothers and daughters are human beings, capable of making mistakes and the relationship just like any other relationships will never be perfect. There could be hurt, disappointment, disconnection, anger and resentment but there’s always love from the mother’s heart and love sadly comes in the end from the daughter’s heart when all there is but a memory.

~H. Johnson
~H. Johnson
Mama did it!
Mama did it! | Source
Mother-Daughter chain of love
Mother-Daughter chain of love

Give it a chance for the relationship to flourish and grow~

There's a hundred and maybe thousands of reasons why we owe our mothers a debt of gratitude. For simply being a solid rock to whom we all look up to, for helping us and teaching us the lessons of love, peace and joy. She's there to comfort us and dry our tears. A mother’s devotion never wanes, no room for breeding bitterness because they are the enduring ones. However, we don't see this because of our stubbornness and biases blinds us. And, after all the nine months of unbearable displeasure, aren’t we supposed to honor thy mother (and father)?

"Women grow up and our energy is largely turned toward men, but the original love relationship is with a mother. If we as daughters don't acknowledge that, we're closing ourselves off from a great source of power and fulfillment and understanding of ourselves." - Lee Sharkey

It is normal for mothers to be controlling though not to the extent for obvious reason that you care about your daughter and that your intention is only to protect her. But, no matter how you control it, life is full of surprises and it’s going to surprise you. Giving up control over life is not easy, yet when you do you are able to release both yourselves to the confinement of the circumstances, resulting into a more balance mother-daughter relationship.

Having a daughter is a wonderful treasure and mothers and daughters can be best friends. It can definitely be acquired, if not innate. A mother and daughter love is one of the strongest forms of love relationships there is. If we only let it flourish and grow.

Mother's love is majestic~
Mother's love is majestic~ | Source

Mother knows best~

There’s no manual, no formula to be a good mother except to gently bring your mind to the here and now and simply experience the wonders of motherhood and appreciate the beauty of the relationship you have with your daughters, which in turn will deepen your daughters relationship with you -mothers.

Mothers do it all - they are the ultimate multi-taskers, very versatile, resilient and they do it all with a sense of joy. A mother's heart always accepts and understands in a deep and profound way. However, that doesn't mean you accept what is unhealthy, unethical and unwise. That's why, it is your responsibility to guide your daughters and scold them, if necessary just so they learn and hopefully absorb what was said that will impact their future choices in life. Mothers guide, support and protect their daughters solely because they love them to and beyond infinity. They try to maintain the connection to enhance the bond and uncut the beauty and essence of the relationship. Ultimately and hopefully, daughters will live out their destinies with God's presence working through them.

The challenges and the challengers~

It is very challenging to be a mother from the ephemeral moments of conceiving through the seemingly forever labor pain, infancy through adolescence and young adulthood through completely mature adult. I know so. I am a mother myself and have experienced the cult of motherhood. The experience is of my own because I wanted to give my daughters the very best in life. I wanted to see my daughters fulfill a successful life, earn a decent living, be God fearing and intact with their values-good values in life. I know too that society is a big factor in shaping up their character and one of my biggest fears is that my daughters will fall prey to the wrong crowd, to the wrong path, the bad influences of the society and end up being hurt or I will end up being hurt.

But then again, it is also challenging to be a daughter. I know so because I am one too. The very first-born, I was the fruit of love, the bundle of happiness for my parents. I brought pleasure and pride to my family (so they say). Although I can be willful at times, I know how to obey and be considerate to others. I willingly submit to my parents' expectations. I obeyed, I showed respect and did what I think was right as a daughter.

~Anne Frank
~Anne Frank

Pray~

And so for mothers when a conflict arise, sometimes you just need to be silent and wait, be ready to pick up the pieces and pray they know that you do things in love.

'Stop your crying and wipe away your tears.
All that you have done for your children will not go unrewarded.
They will return from the enemy's land.
There is hope for your future.
Your children will come back home.
I, the Lord, have spoken'.

(Jer 31: 16,17) Good News Bible

In the end, when all is said and done, then it is simply a restful celebration of the life and the relationship you have with your mother as a daughter and vice-versa.

Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God ~Author Unknown
Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God ~Author Unknown | Source
Hugs & Kisses
Hugs & Kisses | Source
A Mother's Day card from my daughter
A Mother's Day card from my daughter | Source

Poem: Relationship of Mother and Daughter

You can see it in their eyes,
in tender hugs and long good-byes,
a love that only moms and daughters know.
You can see it in their smiles,
through passing years and changing styles,
a friendship that continually seems to grow.
You can see it in their lives,
the joy each one of them derives,
in just knowing that the other one is there...
To care and to understand,
lend an ear or hold a hand,
and to celebrate the memories they share.
- Anonymous

However you reverse the role, it is very challenging to strengthen a mother-daughter relationship. Motherhood in general is tough. It is a gift of perfect madness but surely worth the journey.

Mother-daughter stories, we all have that. Maybe you are the mother, maybe you are the daughter. It could be a happy one, a sad one, a bitter story but in the long run, we all have to tell the stories we have in our bones. You pass that story along in the hope that others may be given out a sense of knowing and belonging. This mother’s day, as it resonates from my heart all the words and wisdom that my mother had told me when I was young, I'm summing them up here and passing along to my daughters.

Mother-Daughter Legacy:

I know in time you’ll have to be on your own but when that time comes, I want you to be ready to face the world with courage and dignity, respect to your self and to others as well. Most importantly, wherever you go and whatever decisions you make in life, keep in mind that family comes first and that when things go wrong as they sometimes will, it will be a pleasure to have you back. Do not falter because you’re never too old to sit on mommy’s lap. As you go face this beautiful yet sometimes cruel world, remember this:

-Slow down, don’t be in such a hurry. It doesn’t do any good to run if you’re headed down the wrong way.

-Don’t tarnish yourself with arrogance. Be proud of yourself but don’t get so big that you forget where you came from.

-Honesty is the best policy. No one was ever ruined to tell the truth.

-You are not alone in this world and you are responsible for more than yourself. Be considerate of other people.

-On bad days, remember that it will only get better and your day will come.

-Do not forget your devotion to your family.

-And lastly, believe. Have faith. Pray.

On my 18th birthday, my mom gave me a lovely birthday card and in a missive, it says: “I am so blessed to have you in my life and never will I be far.” In time for Mother’s day, it’s time I say this back to her: “I am so blessed to have you in my life and never will I be far”.

May the legacy and love continue to flourish in our hearts, mother-daughter, daughter-mother.

I love you everyday.

Copyright@CrisSp -05/10/12~ Read me: "The heart of my soul speaks to the soul of my heart by writing." ~

For "K & KC"~

© 2012 CrisSp

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    • CrisSp profile image
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      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Of course, bravewarrior. Nothing compares to the magnitude of motherhood. Salute!

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 4 years ago from Central Florida

      Cris, I wouldn't trade it for any other job in the world!

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      teaches: You honor me with your visit. Thank you.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      This is beautiful and holds a lot of truth I can relate to from my growing years. Moms are such selfless people who mold our character in love. Thank you.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Galley Queen: You intrigued me. Someday, I'll find out who you are. :) Meanwhile, thank you for your readership and effort in leaving such wonderful comments. I wish you peace and pleasure in the spirit of motherhood.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Shauna, my bravewarrior- thank you for reading and for sharing your experiences and views on motherhood. Indeed, it is a thankless job and never ending but it's paramount. Have a great Mother's Day.

      Love from the sky~

    • profile image

      Galley Queen 4 years ago

      This is a wonderful article Cris. It touched my heart as I am a mother myself who's hurting...quite a story to tell (we all have a story to tell) but I enjoyed your article. It's very enlightening. Happy Mother's Day to you and may you continue to live with the beautiful legacy that your mother' has given you and that you've passed to your own children. Love and light, GQ

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 4 years ago from Central Florida

      Cris, my mother and I had our differences - and a lot of them - when I was growing up. Now we are the greatest of friends. I have one child, a son who is rapidly reaching the age of 21. We, too have had our trials and tribulations. We love each other but sometimes he acts selfishly and says hurtful things. Yet, I continue to give and be Mom. A woman changes when she takes on the role of Mom. At least most of us do. It is a never-ending job because we always put our children first, no matter how old they are.

      Motherhood is often a thankless job but it is the most important job in the world and I'm honored that God has deemed me worthy of the honor.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Hello girishpuri! Thank you for your readership. As a woman, I strongly believed that a mother-daughter relationship is the most beautiful relationship of all and so, I very much treasure it.

      I sincerely appreciate your nice comments and for voting up. I'll see you around HP. Again, thanks a lot.

    • girishpuri profile image

      Girish puri 5 years ago from NCR , INDIA

      very important relationship between daughter and mother, very nicely written hub, voted up.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Hello Carly! I appreciate you stopping by and thank you for your comments. (:

    • CarlySullens profile image

      CarlySullens 5 years ago from St. Louis, Missouri

      This hub was painful to read... I don't know of the mother you speak of. But I hope, and pray I am that mother to my daughter.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      @Melovy & Mmargie1966 - thank you ladies for dropping by. Your readership and comments are very much appreciated. Love from the sky~

    • Mmargie1966 profile image

      Mmargie1966 5 years ago from Gainesville, GA

      Melovy, I love you and what your stand for! You seem to be an incredible mother!

    • Melovy profile image

      Yvonne Spence 5 years ago from UK

      This is a very balanced look at the mother daughter relationship. Like you, I have daughters so have seen it from both sides. I had my differences with my mother and am very glad that I resolved them some time ago. I think it has meant my relationship with my own children has been much freer as a result.

      This is a lovely tribute to all mothers and daughters, and it's great to read such thought provoking words on a Sunday morning! Thank you for writing them!

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Thank you for your readership Ian. I hope none of my hubs disappoint you.

    • Ian Dabasori Hetr profile image

      Ian D Hetri 5 years ago from Papua New Guinea

      Enjoying your hubs is what I do now. As a matter of fact, Im looking forward to reading more of your hubs.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      You flatter me with your kind words IDH! You certainly know how to make people smile. I write what I know best from my heart. Thanks again for your readership and brightening my day! I hope this Monday treats you well.

    • Ian Dabasori Hetr profile image

      Ian D Hetri 5 years ago from Papua New Guinea

      CrisSP,

      You said it so well. What a memory you recounted so well. Such a strong legacy to pass on to your daughter.

      You are energetic, adventurous, romantic and woh! out of description. Oh! a writer. Good writer. You have all it takes my friend. I admire your personality.

      Forgive me but if you were single, I would ask you out on the spot...If this bold statement makes you smile, than I'm glad I put a smile on your face and brightened your heart in so far as good karma is concern.

      Voted up and sharing this hub. Will read your others hubs.

    • Ian Dabasori Hetr profile image

      Ian D Hetri 5 years ago from Papua New Guinea

      CrisSP,

      You said it so well. What a memory you recounted so well. Such a strong legacy to pass on to your daughter.

      You are energetic, adventurous, romantic and woh! out of description. Oh! a writer. Good writer. You have all it takes my friend. I admire your personality.

      Forgive me but if you were single, I would ask you out on the spot...If this bold statement makes you smile, than I'm glad I put a smile on your face and brightened your heart in so far as good karma is concern.

      Voted up and sharing this hub. Will read your others hubs.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Thank you fjpteach for visiting, for commenting and for sharing this hub. Peace and love to you and your mom.

    • fjpteach profile image

      fjpteach 5 years ago from Humble, TX

      Great hub Cris! I love everything about this hub, especially the scripture. I plan on sharing that with my mother as that is exactly what she does for me everyday! Happy Writing!

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Thank you billybuc. I'm honored by your visit. Best Regards-

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      That was a lovely piece of writing my new friend.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      I'm glad you enjoyed it Angela! Thank you for your visit and leaving a comment. Appreciate it and welcome to HP! Happy hubbing!

    • Angela Brummer profile image

      Angela Brummer 5 years ago from Lincoln, Nebraska

      I really enjoyed this! This is such an important realtionship!

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Greetings to you oceansider (Helen)! Thank you for reading and for voting up. I'm glad that you can relate and that you found my hub inspirational. There's no other love greater than mother's love, no matter what. And, I am forever grateful for my mom and for my daughters love in return. Welcome to HP!

    • profile image

      oceansider 5 years ago

      Beautiful hub about the mother-daughter relationship. I also am a mom of three beautiful daughters and we do have very strong bonds between us! I am blessed by God, to be given three lovely daughters, who I am so thankful to say, all love me as much as I love them! ...And I also have a wonderful son & we also have a strong bond & love eachother so much too.

      Thanks for this inspirational article...I vote it up!

      Helen

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Hello and thank you donnaisabella. I speak based on experience and hoping to pass on the legacy to my daughters. You're right, we only completely understand a mother's perspective when we become a mother ourselves. Yours in Motherhood.

    • donnaisabella profile image

      Donaisabella 5 years ago from Fort Myers

      I loved reading this and you speak so well for mothers and for daughters. I have never really had a fractured relationship with my mother but there was a time when there was a misunderstanding between us and it could have damaged our relationship. I am thankful to God that He mended it, I love my mom very much. Now that I am a mother myself, I understand a lot more. Thanks for sharing.

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Thank you Mslofton! I'm glad you like it. Cheers!

    • MsLofton profile image

      MsLofton 5 years ago from IL

      wow, this is excellent! Great Hub!

    • CrisSp profile image
      Author

      CrisSp 5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Greetings from the Universe of Love & Peace to you fellow hubbers: Coffeegginmyrice & CJ Sledgehammer--thank you for voting up and for your wonderful comments as always. I hope all is well with you and yours.

    • profile image

      CJ Sledgehammer 5 years ago

      Wow, Crissp, nicely done!!!

      I don't think there is anything left to add other than to say, "Happy Mother's Day".

      Thank you for such a lovely tribute to mothers everywhere. I cannot imagine how I would have turned out without my mother's love and dedication. :0)

      May God bless you and yours - C.J. Sledgehammer

      P.S. Voted up and away!!!

    • coffeegginmyrice profile image

      Marites Mabugat-Simbajon 5 years ago from Toronto, Ontario

      This hub is so awesome, Cris! I wish our daughters will stumble upon our hubs, feel its contents expressed truly upon a mother-daughter relationship. Hoping our children will feel connected to our feelings for them. They are good and we understand that at their age right now, they are asking for independence. We give them some space but deep in our hearts we worry. Of course, what are mothers for? We seek that they'd be guided and kept safe through our little prayers for them. I tell my girls, "Talk to your guardian angel every day. Say hello." Voted up!